A Cat's Tale (The Secret Desires of Hotaru Nyanko)

One: 不思議な日 (Mysterious Day)

1997

(Hotaru’s P.O.V.)

My ooasan once told me that no matter how you choose your own destiny, fate will still come to your life and by chance make it good or destroy it.

Well at first, I don't understand, for she said that to me a couple of years ago, when I was six and she usually brushed my hair at night in front of the mirror.

“Do you want to hear a story?"

"Yes, Mama"

As she brushed my hair I stare at my mama's reflection in the mirror. I wish I was like her. Fair, beautiful. That night I made a pact to myself that when I grow up, I would be like her.

“There were these four generations in a family"

What are their names? I think.

But I just listen.

"...named Hon, Sok, Tu, and Nyan."

Guess that just answered it.

"They say that on the third generation- which is Tu, a baby girl will be born and the woman who gave birth to it will die on the child's eighteenth birthday, whether it's the cause of the child or by accident."

My ooasan tells me I need not know what happened, for I was too young to understand. But I guess she wants to say these things to me to instill in my mind that when I grow up, I would be curious and attempt to discover the truth.

I was born in Japan, but we moved to Florida five years ago, just to say. My mother is an apprehensive woman, so decidedly she moved into a place where she thinks there is "more freedom, and to forget the bad memories."

Five years ago, we had bad memories in Japan. I was twelve back then. I was in school and when I got home mama was crying saying papa got killed by two people. It was a murder case we can never forget. My brother, Kai was already in college at that time. Soon as he got home from his work, he would terribly weep in front of us. "We don't deserve this!" He told us. None of us do.

Papa was rich and is seven years older than my mama. They married when Kai was little, and I wasn't born yet.

When he died ooasan was deeply depressed for three months. We forced her to eat and prayed to the gods for her.

But then in the fourth month, she talked to her, and papa's lawyer fixed some things, and we left Japan. I still do not know why he died, I kept my mouth shut unless I want to see my mama fall to tears again, and Kai and I talked that we would never say anything about how his death happened again. But then again, curiosity kills sometimes, nudging me to the bone. "Why?" That's what I ask before I sleep.

"Why hadn't I at least had a father to be with me now?" Or at least he'd have time for me because he was always busy at work before.

We left our two-story house in Japan and sold it to another Japanese businessman that is a friend of my father.

**

The good thing about Florida is the sunsets. I love the sunset in the mornings, so I can bask in the sun. My friend, Courtney taught me how to speak English. But I also got a tutor, too.

My mama then enrolled us to Florida State University and soon I became accustomed to the people here and their beliefs. I guess I just learned not to sneak up on other’s business and I’m happy to worry about my own.

I soon learned how to socialize with other people, despite the lonely fact that I should be doing all this in Japan and because I'm Asian with a different culture unlike them.

But the thing is I felt freer here after the incident, and Kai and I always go to beaches to swim, surf, and unwind.

Kai is a good swimmer. Sometimes I wanted to be like him, freer than ever. Flexible and good-spirited. Not like me. I had certain opposite qualities. I can't get over things, and although I feel free here, some things just always bother me.

I have this inner beastly attitude, cursing people when I don't like them, and I whisper words they cannot hear behind their backs. "You're seventeen; try to act like an adult." Kai doesn't know that I'm mature enough, but I just can't help it.

And sometimes I'm kind to other people for what they kindly do to me, but that's it. I leave them as soon as possible if I don't want anything about them. And this is the worst part: my guilty pleasures. I feel my hormones rising to a high level when I am attracted to a boy, and all I wanted is to have sex with the guy. I would think about it all day, nonstop. And then I'll get over it and find someone else to appeal to my senses.

As soon as my last English Class is over, I knew it was time to go home. I bid Courtney goodbye and hurriedly shoved my notebooks inside my bag. Stepping outside the door, I heard raindrops starting to fall. A guy quickly came inside, leaving his umbrella beside the door. He was wearing the bad boy look I made in my head- the usual black leather jacket, but this time the style felt different as soon as he gazed at me for about 10 seconds with those deep, honey brown almost gold-shade set of eyes. "Hotaru!" A voice far from my side shouted. Oh, come on, not now Calvin. Yes, and he is my close friend aside from my best friend Courtney. The guy then quickly walked inside, and his arm touched mine as if he accidentally made his way through for me to notice him and I too walked my way out before Calvin reached me. "Uh-oh, nope. No time for movies now, Calvin. I said to myself." I just pretended not to notice him. Ha-ha. I'm so mean. I'll just text him later.

I always walk home alone. Sometimes I'm too lazy to drive because our house is just three blocks away from the school. Besides, it’s good exercise. Carrying my umbrella close, I still thought about the guy in the jacket with his brown hair and gold eyes- and his tall figure and broad shoulders. Whew, what am I thinking? I guess he could be in his senior year.

It is raining heavily by now. The wind is blowing harder, and my long black hair is flying in front of my face. I can hear footsteps coming close. As I looked up, I saw an old Asian lady- the kind of old witch you saw in Disney's Snow White. But this time she was wearing these pieces of a long necklace of different kinds of beads- tarnished and brown. She was also wearing a long black dress that goes below the knee. And I overheard her spitting some words- like they were spells or curses. Looking towards the ground, she kept on repeating those words and went about like it was not even raining at all. How could she go out like this? I am so frightened I heard myself let out a tiny squeak, and as soon as I did, she come up to me as if she was there because she had to talk to me. I almost tried to run away, but her hand-controlled mine. Her eyes looked red from not blinking and let out a huge gasp. And then she spoke. “Anata wa dai desu’’she muttered with her head down. Before she could finish her sentence, “I-I... have to go" I said.

"It's time." It's time. She repeated this for about five seconds, and then a black cat passed by, and she looked to me and the cat and then to the sky and me then to the ground back again. I noticed that there was no one else in that area besides me and that old lady. I wanted to scream for help, but only tears came out of my eyes.

“What is she talking about?”

“Hello?”

“Hello!”

 I screamed at the top of my lungs as I wandered about the corner. Usually, when I come home there are lots of other students like me passing by to even encounter this kind of situation, but right now it is oddly quiet-just me and the old lady.

She kept murmuring and spitting words as if she is in a dazed ritual, repeating words I don’t understand, and when I finally jolted and released my hand from her, I sprinted my way out.

I wanted to look back for a few seconds, but I couldn’t.

And when I realized that I am already too far away from her, I turned, and she was gone.

When I was home, I gasped for air until I could breathe properly again. I unbuttoned my shirt quickly as I went to my room. I dragged myself to the bed. Downstairs, I could hear my mom whistling as she cooked my favorite ramen. I changed into my sweatpants and oversized shirt and brought all my weight to the bed. I tried to keep the old lady off my mind, and then for ten minutes straight I kept thinking and thinking until I couldn't hold it in and pushed my body to get up and take a shower.

I tried to feel the water pouring out as if cleansing my body and soul. I hummed and sang until I get the old lady off my mind. 

As soon as I went downstairs, I saw mom and Kai chewing their food happily at the table. “You better come here, or I’ll eat all these noodles, he said as he opened up his mouth to another huge bite. I sat at the table and talked about school. “How’s your friend, Courtney?” my mom asked. “She’s okay; we are heading to Bonita’s this week.” Bonita’s Diner is a Mexican restaurant Courtney and I always go to because we love their strawberry chocolate milkshakes and fries. “Oh, and did she ask about me?” Kai asked as his eyes get all large and excited like he won a big prize for another swimming competition. “No, Kura.” I said which means that he was crazy, knowing that he has a disturbing crush on Courtney. While we finish our food Kai and I began fighting about who is going to wash the dishes for the evening. And as I got up, the doorbell rang. I’ll take it, my mom said. I unwillingly lost the rock-paper-scissors battle with Kai when I went to the sink and began washing the dishes.

“Ah-who is it now?’’ muttered Kai. My brother always says that when another delivery man would come to our doorstep and hand over my mom the books she ordered from an online Japanese store. She also loved comics and vintage record players, like they never got old. Somehow, I suspected that it was her old sweetheart from high school, Mike whom Kai and I called “The Giant Man” who recently moved into our town who at one time arrived drunk and told my mom he never forgot about her even if his wife passed away three years ago. I guess at some point in our lives fate just happens. My mom would always have a smile on her face as Mike comes to visit. He is so tall compared to my five-foot mom that his head would almost touch our ceiling.

To my surprise, I turned around and found a white envelope in my mother’s hands. She stood there looking at me, her eyebrows raised. “Well, crazy, seems like you have a secret admirer,’’ my mom said. “Oh, wow.” I hurriedly went for the envelope which has my name on it. “Hotaru” is marked with slurred handwriting in it, like the writer does not have much time to give it much thought.

I suspected that it was Calvin, yet he gave me another prank joke. I texted him to see a movie tomorrow to tell him about the creepy thing that happened, but he didn’t reply. I suspected that he could be mad at me for ignoring him at school a while ago, but I shoved out my thoughts thinking that he was just probably busy hanging out with Ash, his new girlfriend.

Hmmm.

 This day is a heck lot stranger than I think it would be. As I finished the dishes, I am glad Kai was busy enough to ask me questions because he went upstairs to talk to his girlfriend who suddenly called before he even got curious about the letter.

Dear Hotaru:

And by dawn, we become one, as you shall rise.

Let the closest to you be known, but of others: hide.

For if you do not, there will be great sorrow on my part...

I did not know that much time has passed after reading the letter over ten times, still pondering what it means. I check the clock- 12:01 am.

As I remember, my mama just handed me the letter and told me it was just there at the doorstep when she found it.

My mind slowly drifted into deep thoughts, carried away by the things that occurred during the day. What does it mean, “The time has come”?

Slowly, as I gathered my senses, I fell asleep…