Ancient Modern Murim

Chapter 9: Swearing

"Uwah!Bad bald bull,very bad, if only I had a red carpet, it would be more entertaining"

"Oh well! The die has been rolled"

"I better check the things he has, maybe not."

He didn't go back to the illusion array to loot on his stuff.

The Distance he flew was so far, Xiang Monji was too lazy to go back,to be more precise his stamina is already minuscule,he decided not to take  a risk. and forget about looting his stuff, so he decided to return to his vassals.

But before that Xiang takes the stuff of the assassin he amputated, still he isn't dead yet, he's unconscious, with a broken spiritual pool.

When he checked his stuff, what he saw were a cultivation book that was shattered, a crumbled tag, pills that were crushed and a cheap dagger that has a visible crack at the tip of the edge.

"I can't read what's on the tag, the cultivation book and dagger are useless, the pills are crushed into powder, I have gone too far."

"Oh! well if I met another meanie onii....chan..!, I'll ask him to hand over his stuff in a *gentle way. "

(*gentle way in sarcasm)

["This bastard is more cruel than I imagine, If I am a bastard, he's a bastard to all bastards, I'm no longer surprise"]

Xiang Monji smile in facade,

"Spermy were you talking behind my back, I can feel a tingling sensation behind my back."

"hahaha! no way!"

"Really?"

"Alright your name is Bastard, starting today"

Spermy show a pitiful impression in front of his master, while shedding *crocodile tears,

(*crying fake tears)

"Master your cruel! Boho boho boho boho!"

"Bastard", "Jerk", "bitch"

"You want me to name you these names?"

"Nononono! Master, I am a Bartard, hehehehe"

Xiang Monji turn his back,

["Wait for me bitch! I'll spank your buns, once I have a physical body, hehehehe!

I am a supreme being out of all those billions of sperm I stand at the top,

I am a look a like tadpole transform into a powerful  2 leg being,

blah..blah...blah...blah....]

Xiang Monji looks for a thick succulent vine, cuts it into 10 meters long, then wraps it on the neck of the amputated assassin.

"Hey! Bastard drag this body for me"

"Drag the body, that I may hear the friction of his body and ground colliding."

"Master, I don't have a physical body, my existence is intangible"

Spermy act prideful, a prop of golden light shine in his body,

"But fear not master if you convert your life points to me, I can use psychokinesis to move objects without touching"

"Now praise the great me, huhuhuhuhu!

"Oh crap!, I wasn't supposed to help him"

Spermy's facial expression isn't good

"Oh dear!"

Xiang Monji smile like an angel,

"Good job! Spermy your very convenient, "

Vitality left 1, 1second later 1,500 life points available, 2 second later 3,000 life points available. 3 second later 4,500 life points available, so on and so forth.

Spermy is crying in his mind, while showing a poker face.

["Master, don't flatter me, you make me waver on my decision, whether I take my vengeance or not, waaah.....!]

Spermy drags the body using psychokinesis, while Xiang Monji is on top sitting cross-legged, of an unconscious assassin.

"¡Vamos! rapido! rapido!"

Xiang Monji was watching Dora the Explorer when he was young in his previous life.

He knows how to speak Spanish, words only spoken by dora.

And most of all Xiang Monji tend to swear a lot towards  Dora for pretending to be dumb.

{Flash back when Xiang Monji was a kid in his previous life,}

"Ola! amigos soy Dora,"

"Yeah, yeah your Dora, how many times do you introduce yourself"

The moment Dora ask for help,

"Did you see a big tree, where?"

Instead of using the pointy finger to point at the big tree, Xiang Monji uses his middle finger to point at the big tree.

Xiang Monji ask in return,

"Did you see where my middle finger was?

His hand was formed into fist, then suddenly his middle finger was raised.

"Fuck you"

"Hahahahahaha!"

Back to the current situation,

Xiang Monji Sang again, feat Spermy

Come on, vámonos🎶

Everybody let's go🎶

Come on, let's get to it🎶

I know that we can do it🎶

Where are we going?🎶

To the  carriage 🎶

Where are we going?🎶

To the Carriage🎶

Where are we going?🎶

To the Carriage🎶

Where are we going?🎶

To the Carriage🎶

"Haha"

"Haha"

"Carriage, Oh shit!"

Xiang Monji almost arrived, he saw the carriage visible away from him, by concentrating his spiritual ki on the eye.

Xiang Monji, talk to himself,

"Hey Dora, did you see my carriage?"

"Dora, did you see it?"

"Oops....I'm sorry your to dumb to see anything on sight in front of you."

Spermy was silent,

["I better not say anything, probably he is in his period, like girls do."]

Xiang Monji asks Spermy to retreat and drag the unconscious body to himself.

When he arrive, his vassals were worried sick about him,

"Young Master, were you alright? Did something bad happen to you?

Elianor his personal handmaid went out from the carriage and suddenly jump towards him and hug him tightly.

"Young Master thank goodness you're safe, I thought you were killed by those suspicious looking guys."

Maoyi was relief,

"good thing I told them the wrong direction, if not young master's life will be in danger"

"By the way, young master, who is that guy you were dragging along?"

"Oh this, just a passerby that I just met along the way, if you're asking what I'm doing right now, better not ask it's kinda complicated"

"Don't tell me, where do you save by a blonde woman?"

"Um...yeah, I saw her fighting with this guy at my back, He got amputated, his hands, legs and dick were cut by that woman"

"I also saw a guy same cloth wear as him, He was dead when I saw him, I only saw a glimpse of this guy being cut, the girl went somewhere after what happen, as for his wound I look at his pocket, took the pill and let him consume a rank 3 elixir into his mouth"

["everything is a lie, this should cover what happen."]

"Uwah, young master did you saw the beautiful blonde girl"

"Well, yeah!"

Her eyes were dilated and shining,

"If I remember her name was Alexandria Voin Vivalde, in short his name is Xandria, she was so cool, I want to be like her someday"

"Yes, yes you will become like her someday"

[Alexandria, I'll remember that name]

At night, the tent is set, the campfire is ready, after eating and talking, they go to sleep using the same procedure and protocol as observed.

By 7 am they went straight to their journey, while on their journey heading to Ming City they heard the sound of a loud cry.

"Ugh!, what kind of a problem are we facing again"

"Halt"

"two people will stay to guard, while one of you will come with me to search for it's source"

"Hike"

Xiang Monji was also curious, judging by its sound like a human, It must be a humanoid plant in those cultivation stories that shout very loud.

"Xiang Monji went out to the carriage to look to its source, as for those that were left behind the carriage they weren't able to react, he was gone before they could react."

He went to a waterfall, below the waterfall he could feel the sound vibrating beneath it, he went in to take a look.

He sees a plant, he plucks it out like a carrot, and consumes it, since his hunch was correct.

Geris and Shindi arrive at Xiang Monji's spot.

Geris ask,

"Young Master why are you here, and why can I feel that your spiritual ki is unstable at the same time a strong energy gushes out from your body"

silent..... Xiang was meditating

Geris speculate,

"Did you consume something without our knowledge?"

Open his eyes,

"Hehehe, I ate a ginseng and it was glowing, I was amaze so I eat it"

"Young Master, you were eating a 100 old ginseng."

"It can amplify your power and raise your cultivation"

"But it must be consumed carefully, if it's not managed and handled well, your body will explode."

"Well help you young master circulate the excessive energy"

a few moments later,

Xiang Monji was able to cultivate the spiritual ki smoothly thanks to their help and to his skill called aura/magic manipulation.

Xiang Monji was staying in the waterfall and meditating, Geris and Shindi went back to the carriage and waited for him to fully consume the energy.

The next day early in the morning they have breakfast.

A creature charges so fast in their direction while they're eating.