Even my friend Edward Ramirez helped me without any boundaries. I released the very core of my existence to the people who loved me. Edward and Ayah were the two human beings that always lifted me up for whatever problems I was entangled with my vices.
Edward Ramirez and Ayah Isabel Gonzales nursed my soul to be back again. Knowing that I can revive my spirit and resume the ambition I have had. They stayed for a while and encouraged me all the way.
"Best friend, are you alright now? I'm very happy about the changes...I mean, the changes in you. Glad to know that you can work again. I'll tell our manager about your comeback... You know, he's asking about you and I lied, knowing that I want you to work there again. Yes, my friend?" Edward asked me one day.
"Yes my friend, now I realized... how foolish I was...how weak," I answered crying.
I started to concentrate on my studies for two consecutive years through which I gave real meaning to them. The vital things that matter most to me were the ones that triggered my motivation to grow. The development that I almost conquered was reeling to be mine; for I excelled in all my subjects, extra-curricular activities, and friends. It's nonetheless a revival!
I joined the college publication to explore the possibilities of motivating my inner self to reveal what's inside of me. A written form of expressing my thoughts and feelings; poetry, short stories, and drama guild, healed it gradually. Most of my time, I spent with these activities, not knowing that I was changing the values of my life.
My life now was the reverse of what I experienced during my first year in the city.
The first free verse poem that I constructed was entitled: "Closer to Me"
Your beauty captures my heart; your soul surrounds me wherever I am. Perhaps, you are the Goddess of beauty? I feel you are endless.
I feast my vision on you and turn towards the light. Perhaps by chance but definite in direction.
I am drawn by the deepest awareness of you which probes my heart to think of you and feel your soul throughout my life.
I know so very little yet feel so much, Oh, it's a great feeling to see your soul! Unable to gaze at your beauty, my soul provides to my heart, a vision...Unable to touch you.
Our soul's touch sends us to pleasure and our bodies shiver with ecstasy in the oneness of perfection!
I am amazed by you, as you are, you are not far...you are close...
And I held you so tenderly, closer each moment, closer to you!
XXX
The changes took their toll when I met someone who can turn the tide. I was in my fourth year in college when I met Danielle Gustilo at another university. She was a beautiful; business-minded kind of person, a classy type, and came from a well-to-do family. My flamboyant character attracted her when we were together. She did not know that I was only baiting her for a refuge; investment and money. I courted her for three months. She was totally in love with me. I learned to love her the way she wanted it to be. I am a person who can play things with to perfection if I wanted to. I was incorporating myself into her dreams. She knew my meager standing and offered to help me; with my college tuition fees, for my daily undertaking, and even for sex. I accepted her offer that I even asked for more. I tasted her beauty to the fullest. I cannot fathom my insatiable desires that even the mountains mourned for my soul. The greedy ambition confronts my being to continue living in the craziness of man.
She gave me what I wanted for her, the satisfaction, the heaven...but, let me set the scene, just for your total information.
Imagine.... the night's cool, brisk, quiet, and heavy with the fresh rain. A small breeze swayed through the bottom of the slightly open windows, bringing in the scent of the sweet fresh rain. It mingled scantily with the fragrance of fruity-sweet-apple emanating from the several candles strategically placed around the room that flickers slowly in the breeze. The pale blue curtains danced and tickled in the skimming breeze.
The cool breeze touched the thick blue carpet, mingling the scent of the beautiful rain with the fragrance already placed into the weaves. A candle sits nestled in one corner of the room on a black wrought iron glass top table, illuminating the pale blue behind it.
A candle sits on the two windows across the room from each other, the flames dancing tightly in time and in tune with one another, but never going out. Two more candles sit at the center of two end tables snuggled close to either side of the bed. The faintest music of wind chimes that hang in the last window behind me can be heard over the sweet tinker and echo of the rain. Our king-sized bed sits in the center of the room, draped in glossy red satin sheets, topped with a thick red feather blanket, with several plush feather pillows lining the cherry wood headboard. The light was so very dim, but even so, I can see everything clearly in the muted glow.
I can see Danielle sitting on the bed, head resting comfortably on the plush pillows. She's wearing a red silk nightgown with her body curve drawn from inside. Her feet are crossed and propped up on the folded-down blanket. Her arms are crossed over her soft breasts pulling tightly against the taut fabric.
I was standing naked in front of the bed looking at her.
I wore the crooked sexy smile that she had always found so dreamy on me and it always made her weak at the knees. I stretched my muscular body, arms raised over my head and her feet reaching towards me. My body relaxed again and scooted down a little, still looking at her.
Her eyes slowly slide down my body, then even more leisurely back up. Again, her gaze lingered on my muscular body.
I stepped up towards the high bed and put one leg up on the blanket and painstakingly slowly I raised myself up from the floor to stand before her on the bed. I slowly rocked side to side; grinding my hips down slowly towards the bed until my knees were touching the feather blanket, then leaned down forward on my hands until I was on all fours before her. I came forward a little, and with my one hand, I began to untie the little satin ribbon that was holding the top of her nightgown. I let my greedy eyes get even hungrier at the sight of her supple breasts."Do you like what you see?" she said in a husky whisper.
Just the sight of licking my dry lips makes her know that I do.
The music slows down a little to another song, and now I know what I want to do. Somehow it was there inside me all along; I just didn't know how to get it out.
That animal passion that I wanted to use when teasing her all night long was finally coming out in me.
With the beat of the music, I explored her body with ardent pleasure starting from her collarbone, gently nipping and biting her as I slowly began to kiss her body.
The music changes again and I can't hold on any longer. I reached her head pulling close to me and kiss her while in a kneeling position. I gently bite her lip as I kiss her and feel the passionate searing pain of her nails on my back. I draw in a sharp breath, not from the pain from exploring. She arched her back up into my hands, feeling her nails lingering on my lower back. I looked at her and she barely nods back to me, but it is enough for her to know I'll finally let us into this dance.
Her arms are around my shoulders now as she feels me move more on top of her, feeling every curve of her body welding with mine. Our breaths get shallow and quickened, but neither of those things matters right now. All that matters in this one moment is Danielle and me. She began to close her eyes when I begin to enter her lovely heaven. I whisper to her to open her eyes and look into my eyes, and my first blow made her totally energized.
We rock back and forth in this sensual dance. I hugged her so tight and kissed her so hard. We collapsed together, our passions spent, and gave her a silver ring as an engagement. She rested in my arms breathing slowly and contentedly. We soon fall asleep in each other's arms, knowing to myself that I captured her, like a prisoner in a cage!
XXX
Danielle and I enjoyed every moment of our lives without any recourse for anybody, anywhere, anything that could stop us from becoming lovers. We had done so many nights together, exploring our most precious gift from heaven. The remnants of our past didn't hinder an inch for which Danielle played her part so well. And, even my soul didn't bother to collide with my greedy ambition from wanting it.Both of us developed something beautiful within our hearts, according to the dictates of our minds. For each of us, there's some kind of understanding that we wouldn't have to be spoken about, our actions were the prime movers of our future.We were together all the time and found ourselves at the rooftop bar of the hotel. She held my hands, squeezed them tightly on the table, and said, "Marc, I like this moment so much, with you, having dinner in the Skylight. Bar. It reminds me, when I first saw you, for the first time I felt very different from myself. I knew too well, deep in my heart th
"Okay, it's okay. What more...what he said to you?" I asked her in a higher tone. "He said to try to visit him at the Riviera Café & Restaurant."I lowered my voice, "Okay Ayah, thank you. How's your life in the boarding house? How's your family?""In my boarding house... it's quite problematic but I can manage. And my family...they're fine.""Take care always Ayah." I started to leave when I remembered something inside my pocket, "By the way, take these drugs and read the prescription first before taking the pill, I think you knew this...." Ayah looked at me squarely, smiled, and said, "Okay love, bye!"The next day I visited Edward Ramirez at the restaurant where he's working. He excused himself from his duty asking his Manager to have a day off instead. We got a taxi cab going to One Springfield Complex, a beautiful night spot outside the city. We played bowling for about an hour and seated ourselves in a restaurant in an open place. I ordered a case of beer, sliced cucumber, and
We arrived early at the Golden Dragon Restaurant located in front of Bacolod City Hall. It's located in the heart of the city, five minutes ride from our place. The ambiance is totally Chinese; the intricate golden dragon motif with a red background, the music, the waitress uniform, and the lantern hang beautifully in each partition with silk curtains as a facade. The aroma of Chinese food triggered my voracious appetite. I composed myself and gazed at Ayah Isabel walking separately from me. She's nervous, I thought, but she's calm, calmer than me. We are seated at the corner of the restaurant so that I can see who's coming inside the restaurant. I ordered two glasses of coca-cola soft drinks for a start and we waited.Danielle Gustilo came ten minutes past eleven in the morning. She's wearing a sleeveless red dress that suits her milky white skin, and a red leather clutch bag that blends with our environment. She looked at me first, then, shifted to Ayah Isabel, then sit down in fron
Let me tell you what I worked for temporarily...where I started my first job...for the past months after my graduation. An amazing story indeed!I am a Chemistry graduate, right? But I was accepted as an extra news reporter for the newly founded TV station. At the end of my shift one Monday morning, Arthur Jimenez, the sports director at News TV 717, said, "Marco, this Friday night there's a boxing championship fight in the Paglaum Astrodome. You've been bugging me for a break, so here's your chance. Today, around noon, I need you to get me a three-minute interview with Billy the Kid. If you do a good job, that interview will be fed to all TV stations locally and nationwide. Getting to be heard countrywide amounts to decent exposure, wouldn't you agree?"How could I not? Man, talk about excitement! After some time, I had finally landed a weekend-only, graveyard shift job at what, with a great payment check. Hopefully, this job would provide opportunities to climb further up the ladder
Even Lydia Leynes, a beautiful lady from the north of Negros Occidental became my live-in partner, which gave me terrible problems with my job. I was out of the job instantly; I was totally broke when things got better which brought hope to my life.Edward was the one I enjoyed being with, for it gave me the freedom to reveal something deep down in my heart. He was there for me to listen to whatever I wanted to say, whatever I wanted to do with my life at the moment. He suggested working again in the restaurant. I hesitated at first, but my hopeless situation told me to accept the job.I felt down and out I missed her...them...her...XXXDanielle's father invited me to the Sugarlandia Hotel to talk about his daughter's status in life. I went directly to the place, asked for information on the counter, and sat in the lounge. I felt some doubts within me, that I couldn't explain. Is it I am afraid, afraid of what? Fear..? Fear of rejection? Or I was not ready to meet him face to face?M
I saw Edward approaching where I stood, pulling my arm, and taking me to our table."Hey Marco Fernando, what are you doing? People are looking at you. Behave my friend okay?"I only nodded and started to pour a shot of tequila, with salt and sliced lemon, and three slices of beef steak. Then, I ate the kinilaw and gulped a bowl of soup. I was satisfied and contented that I asked Edward to order more."What? Slowly, Marco, I'm not rich enough to order for more...""Hey...hey Edward my best friend...next week, I'm rich...a rich man!! We will paint the town red!! We'll go shopping, swimming, drinking...until the end of the world!!!...and...and..we'll buy everything...as in anything!!! I shouted."Hey, Marco!! Stop it...stop!! What's your problem, my friend?" Edward angrily asked. "What happened to you? Are you crazy? You don't have money in your pocket... Okay, let's go!"" Joel, bill please...how much?""One thousand and five hundred pesos sir," Joel answered."Here, two thousand pesos
I edged a little to clear the monotonous tone of the atmosphere glanced at Ayah Isabel, started to taste my coffee, put a little sugar, and tasted it. I looked around again, seated comfortably ready for any issue that befalls me. I saw Mr. Gonzales scrutinize me by the way he looked into my eyes. He started the conversation, "Marco, I have been able to raise my children the proper way of conduct with themselves ever since they're young, three of them. We loved them...truly, that we gave the best of everything to them. Now, I must tell this personally, what Bryan said to us. That you and Ayah are living in without the sanctity of marriage...do you truly love my daughter?" His question made me squirm and uncomfortable.Again, I glanced at Ayah Isabel but she was not looking at me. I can see tears falling down her cheeks. "Yes, yes I do Mr. Gonzales," I said quickly without hesitation."Since you loved each other, I decided that your marriage be consummated at once. We will organize this
"Okay, stay there for a while; I'll check the surroundings first." I headed to move slowly at first, inspecting the nearby place if it was safe for us. The scorching sun bit my flesh like a scorpion's sting. I went back to where Ayah's waiting told her to move fast and held her left hand towards the rocky side of the beach. We took off our clothes totally, our naked bodies shone in the light of the sun like gems. We washed our clothes and underwear, tightly squeezed it, and spread it open on the boulder. We remained in the water for a few minutes, waited for our clothes to dry, and dressed up. Ayah and I looked for any residents along the shore or anybody who can help us. But, nothing...no one...it's a remote area. I looked at Ayah Isabel and said sarcastically, "Ayah, you're wearing heels? We're going to walk for a few kilometers away...look at you?""Yes, my feet hurt while running in the fields....," while grimacing her face."Give it to me." She handed her heels, I looked for a st