Serenity | After
“What do you think of… Leo?” Natalia asks as we move through the dining hall in House.
“Which one’s he?” I ask.
“The dark one with the Edgar Allen Poe.” She jerks her head to a boy reading while systematically putting forkfuls of pasta into his mouth.
“He’s cute,” I giggle. “Let me guess, he’s claimed by some crazy boarding school girl.”
“Naw, we don’t do that,” she laughs. “But he is sorta off limits. Anyway, you get to meet Zaire tonight. He’s the one with Fall Out Boy.”
Sitting at the table I’ve eaten breakfast and lunch at today is a boy with dark hair and headphones. He’s one of the guys who was sitting on the stage with the rest of the important people in assembly this morning. If my memory serves right, he’s the youngest prefect in history.
“How come he wasn’t at breakfast or lunch?”
“Because he has all these prefect duties which means he gets to have lunch with the Fantastic Four.” She sits down. “He also got to miss form, the lucky bastard.”
“Who are the Fantastic Four?” I ask, sitting at the seat that I think is now mine.
“Denny’s Reed Richards, Ali’s Johnny Storm, Zoe’s Sue Storm and Freddie’s Ben Grimm,” Zaire answers, looking up. “I’m Scott Lang, by the way.”
Natalia snorts. “Keely’s doing?”
He nods. “Who’s this?”
“Serenity,” I reply.
“I’m Zaire,” he says. “And no matter what lies Natalia, Hawk and Raffiel have filled your Californian head with, I’m not insane.”
“You are insane,” Raffiel says as he sits. “You got up earlier than everyone today. I’m pretty sure you broke a record.”
“I’m not insane,” Zaire repeats. “If anyone’s insane, it’s Dr Maria Luna. Where’s Hawk? I need to discuss this lunatic with him.”
“He’s right here.” Hawk slams a tray down and slides into the seat next to me. “God, this stuff is a disgrace.” He pokes a fork at his plate, making a face.
“It’s pasta, Hawk.” Natalia rolls her eyes. “And not everyone is a culinary genius.”
“Remember when you did those interviews in last year at the start of spring?” Zaire interrupts. “For the school therapist? Yeah, well I met her today at lunch. Properly.”
“Ooh!” Hawk drops his fork. “Who was it? I hope it was F—“
He cuts himself off and takes a long sip of water to draw attention away from himself.
“It’s some woman named Luna,” Zaire explains. “She called me Diego.”
“What, like Dora’s brother?” Raffiel asks.
“Yeah. She came into the room where we were to say hi to everyone and we were supposed to say our names.”
“Let me guess, you skipped and held hands afterwards,” Raffiel snickers, causing Zaire to roll his eyes.
“No. When it comes to me, she says ‘Hi, Diego.’ She played it off all casual and just pretended that I looked like some guy at her university.”
“So?” Hawk asked. “I saw this one girl during the summer who looked exactly like Raelynn, but with loads of braids.”
“Come on, Hawk, how many people except my father and grandmother do you know who have eyes like mine?”
Out of curiosity, I glance at his eyes. He’s right, that isn’t a common colour. Blue? Sure. Brown? Definitely. Green? Yes. Grey? I’ve seen quite a few. But I have hardly ever seen anyone with eyes that are all those colours at once. Blue and green and grey with a hint of hazel.
“Maybe she didn’t see your eyes.”
“It was creepy,” he says. “So, did she mention anything in the interview about herself?”
“I can’t tell you that,” Hawk says. He sees the look Zaire gives him. “Alright. I won’t tell you anything important, but she went to Claire.”
“Hawk, have I ever told you how much I freaking love you?”
“Shut up and eat this monstrosity,” Hawk answers before turning to me. “Serenity, how was your first day?”
“Fine,” I answer. “I think I might need to get a Maths tutor. My old one in San Diego offered to do it over video call, but time zones and all that.”
“I can tutor you,” Raffiel offers. “Saturday night okay?”
“Yeah, sure.”
It’s not like I’ll have any plans anyway. I must have less of a social life here than I did in San Diego. At home, or at Everly House. God, that’s pathetic.
“Serenity, can I ask you another question?” Zaire asks.
“Okay.”
“Have you seen a scrapbook in your dorm?” he questions. “It’s black, not very big. There’s a scrap of paper stuck on the front with Charlotte written on it. Seen it anywhere?”
“I don’t think so.” I turn to Natalia. “Have you?”
“No,” she says. “It’s just something Zaire is a little weird over. If you want to look at pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio and the Peaky Blinders, I suggest taking a look in Brooklyn’s locker.”
I leave dinner earlier than everyone else to go back to the room Natalia and I now share and to avoid more conversations about Leonardo DiCaprio scrapbooks. Despite her initial freak out about the whole room sharing thing, she’s been really nice about the whole situation. She even asked what time I usually wake up to set the alarm to a time that would suit us both.
I still hate it.
It reminds me of Everly. The single beds with small, regular chests of drawers and closets. It shouldn’t remind me of that place. The view is different. Instead of seeing the outskirts of the city, all I can see from the window is an English beach. It’s nothing compared to the golden brown sand and blue-green sea at the beach I’m used to. But here the sand is more pebble than sand and the sea is more grey than blue.
“Hi,” a soft voice says behind me.
Behind me is a girl. Not just any girl. The girl from the painting in assembly. The girl who made Natalia, Hawk and Raffiel practically jump out of their skin. The girl whose pictures have been spammed on the statuses and Instagrams and Snapchat Stories of everyone who have shared their online accounts with me. I rack my brains to find her name.
Charlotte. Charlotte Cezanne.
“I’m Charlotte,” she says. “You’re Serenity, right? The new girl from San Diego?”
“I am.” My voice is barely a whisper.
This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening. This was meant to stop. This had stopped. I’m not meant to do this anymore. Not since Naomi. Not since Neo. Not since I killed her. Not since they locked me up and diagnosed me.
“Well, Serenity, sit down.” Charlotte gestures to my bed. “I like to think I’m a good hostess.”
“What do you want?”
“Serenity, I want you to do me a favour.” She smiles, flashing her perfect white teeth. God, even in death the girl looks amazing. “It’s a big favour.”
“What? To hold a séance so you can contact your boyfriend?”
“Leo wasn’t—” she stops herself. “I don’t want you to hold a séance. I want you do something much bigger.”
“What? What the hell do you want me to do?” I demand. “Because I’m not supposed to do anything like this anymore.”
“I want you to solve my murder.”
Zaire | BeforeThey look like us. Mr Oriel, Mr Cezanne, Mr Forrest and Mr Salvatore all sit together and they look like us. I don’t know where the women are, Natalia took them off about an hour ago and they are a no-show for lunch. My father is still in Paris, arriving in two days. It’s the earliest he could arrange the trip for. I try not to resent the fact that the parents of all my friends got here within twenty-four hours of her death and mine couldn’t. His absence is abundantly obvious to me, a gap between Nick Cezanne and Matteo Salvatore.“This is creepy,” Leo says, also staring at the table of fathers. “Is he still carving that headstone?”Matteo Salvatore arrived while carving Charlotte’s details into a slab of stone with a marble angle on the top. Raffiel gets the talent with woodwork from him. Mr and Mrs Cezanne insisted he didn’t have to, but he insisted that he did.“If I could do this when I was eighteen, I can do this now,” he said stubbornly. “The workshop still here?
Serenity | AfterThe days begin to become more bearable. A routine is established and I follow it like everyone else. Wake up, get ready for school, eat breakfast, go to school, eat lunch, finish school, do homework, do some kind of activity, go to bed, do it all again.So it’s a shock when Saturday comes and the alarm stays silent. Natalia is awake too, on her phone in bed. Her dark hair is fanned out across the pillow, black against the white and pink of the pillowcase.“Cool,” I answer. “Um, I kind of wanted to ask you something.”“Shoot.” She shuts up and runs a hand through her hair like a comb.“Remember that girl you told me about? Your old roommate? Was her name Charlotte?” The words tumble out quickly.“Yeah,” she says. “Her name was Charlotte. Why?”“Just wondering. She’s very popular online.”Natalia doesn’t reply for a minute. “Serenity, I kind of don’t want to talk about this anymore. Can you ask someone else if you want to know more?”“Of course,” I say quickly. “Anyone
Zaire | BeforeIt doesn’t take long for me to stop thinking of her as Charlotte and start thinking of her as Charlotte’s body.Charlotte’s body is laid out on a long table in the Assembly Hall, flat on her back. She looks exactly as she had on the beach when we had found her about four hours ago. Back when she was Charlotte and not Charlotte’s body.She had been lying half in the sea and half out. Her hair was swaying in the water as the waves lapped around her. Sand clung to her damp legs, something she would never have allowed. She was always the image of perfection, like a model in a glossy magazine. She was on her front but her head was tilted to one side, her lips tinged an unnatural blue.It had taken me only a second to realise what had happened. She had drowned. Charlotte, the star swimmer who had taught me to swim when we were five, had drowned.Everyone else who had been there is asleep now. Only I had refused to go to sleep, not wanting the image of Charlotte’s tangled hair
Serenity | AfterI might be able to drown in all this rain.It taps relentlessly on the windows and the sound makes me cringe though nobody else seems to be bothered. Nobody else in this hall seems to be bothered by the thundering rain or the fact that everyone is tracking water and mud into the hall. They’re used to it. But I see rain so rarely that it’s shocking to see so much so fast.I’ve been sat here for about half an hour where the teacher told me to, ignored by everyone else. Younger kids are brought in by exhausted looking teachers and older kids, older students stroll in and yell to their friends. Even the youngest class have already made alliances— the girls with the shiniest shoes and the most innocent looks are trailed by several wannabes. It’s the same with the boys, except they value different things in their role model.“Hi,” a voice says suddenly to my left. “So sorry for leaving you here for so long. Raelynn just happened to lose the goddamn list.”The voice belongs
Zaire | AfterExactly six weeks and one day ago, Charlotte Brooklyn Cezanne died. Exactly six weeks and one day ago, my life fell to pieces. Exactly six weeks and one day ago, Zaire Denzel Sullivan officially went mad.But thank God (and science) for letting me keep my good looks. For not having me look like the spiralling madman I am. Or— as Raffiel would say— mad teenager because I’m not eighteen yet. For now, I still look like Zaire. Perfect hair, not too perfect uniform, perfectly blank expression. I stand in front of the mirror in our bathroom, examining myself.Outside, rosy streaks have coloured the skies and a pale, watery sun shines through the glass of the window in a traditional English fashion. It’s way too early for hardly anyone else to be up. At Claire Hall, you learn to cherish every minute of sleep you get. We’re not like most boarding schools which keep you so busy you can’t get a free minute to be homesick. At Claire, you cherish every moment of sleep because it’s a
Serenity | BeforeI sit in the middle of my bedroom, in the centre of a circle of thirteen scented candles in pretty glass jars. They’re all vanilla, Mom’s favourite scent. Technically, they are hers. Dad bought them as their twentieth wedding anniversary gift. But I need them tonight.“How long will it take?” Naomi asks nervously, fiddling with her hair.She sits opposite me, her auburn hair sitting in her shoulder, pulled away from the flames. Her hair reaches to her waist in long, natural waves most girls have to achieve with curlers. In the recent weeks, her slender frame has become dangerously skinny and her dark eyes are shadowed with exhaust.I shrug. “Depends on what you give me.”On her lap sits a blue football jersey with the number sixty-eight printed on the back. His parents gave in his second jersey for the school to put on display, giving his first one to Naomi. It’s soft and still smells like grass and soap.“So are you, like, a witch?”I shrug once again. “I’m not real
Zaire | AfterWe sit in Room Seven, an empty classroom. It’s not a room I particularly like to be in. It was our Year Seven and Eight Maths classroom, so immediately associated with bad memories. Usually, I strangely love Maths. But the teacher I had those two years made me want to drive a knife through the subject. I have similar feelings towards Shakespeare. Only, I want to resurrect him with Charlotte’s coven of witchcraft practicing highlighters just to kill him all over again.“How did you become friends?” he asks. “If you remember.”“Dad thought I was lonely. Her mum thought she was lonely. They brought us together for a play date and we were stuck with each other, I guess.”“Just best friends?” Davidson raises an eyebrow.“Boys and girls can be friends, you know,” I snap. “It’s the twenty-first century.”“Did she have a boyfriend?”“As far as I know, she didn’t.”“Did she want to have one?” he questions. “Anyone she was interested in?”“Leo Forrest. He’s in our class.” I pause.