The elves and Logan cuddled close in bed for another few hours. The four of them woke up around ten thirty in the morning, still groggy as heck. They could have easily slept another four or five hours, but unfortunately, checkout was at eleven. They hadn’t brought anything up to the room, so getting ready to leave was as simple as tossing on their original clothes and making sure Logan had his phone, wallet, and keys.Once they were all ready to go, they went to check on Rafe.The goblin looked like death when he opened the door. There were gigantic bags under his bloodshot eyes, and his entire body was twitching involuntarily.“Uh, are you okay?” Logan asked curiously.“N--never better,” Rafe responded.“It’s almost time to check out,” Logan continued. “How’d you sleep last night?”The goblin raised a trembling hand to his chin and pondered the question for a moment. Then, he looked up at Logan and shrugged.“I didn’t,” he said as he smiled. “I beat the game at around six in th
Logan patted the steering wheel jovially and smiled. “She might be a little banged up,” he joked, “but she’s still purring like a kitten.”“Yeah,” Rafe snickered, “a mangy kitten. The kind you’d see in a Sarah McLachlan commercial.”“She still runs,” Logan retorted. “As long as Shadow can get us from point A to point B, that’s all that matters.”“I dunno, bro,” Rafe continued. “I’d say once Beth gets the Velvet Lips back up and running and Ira starts collecting her politician’s salary, they should trade in ol’ faithful and get a Lambo.”“Orrrrr … ” Logan tried to plead with the goblin. “They could just have Beth fix up Shadow with her healing powers and keep using their Jeep.”“Where’s the fun in that?” Rafe sighed. “I’m sure everybody in this vehicle right now would rather have a sexy red Lamborghini than a soccer-mom Jeep.”“Again,” Logan reminded the goblin, “soccer moms drive vans. Jeeps are for rugged off-roaders which is much closer to what we are.”“A Lambo would be really sexy
My friends and I studied the menu for a bit, and then a perky blonde waitress appeared at our table with a tray full of waters.“Hi, guys!” She grinned. “Do you think you’re ready to order?”“It’s a tough call,” Logan pondered aloud. “Do you recommend the ribeye steak or the swordfish?”The waitress thought for a moment. “Marty’s is famous for our steaks, so I’d say that one. I’ve heard great things about the swordfish, though.”“Screw it.” Logan shrugged. “I’ll take the ribeye. Medium, if you don’t mind.”The waitress scribbled down Logan's order and then turned to the rest of the group.“I want a T-bone,” Ira said without missing a beat. “As rare as you can legally make it.”“I second that.” Kelda nodded.“Two steaks, still mooing,” the blonde server joked. “Got it. And for you two?”“I want to try the pork chops,” Abina explained. “I’ve never had those, but they sound delicious.”Now it was Rafe’s turn. “This might sound crazy,” the goblin warned. “I want a medium rare steak, but c
"Harmless?" Logan mused. "Is he really so far down the rabbit hole that 'selling your soul' is considered harmless?""It's better than the alternative of death or eternal damnation," Ira countered."Fair enough," Logan conceded, then cut off a piece of his steak. He took a moment to admire the morsel resting on his fork.It was perfectly-seared with small black grill markings all across it. Small ripples of sleek fat ran along the outer edge of the cut, creating that marbling effect every butcher knows and loves. There were bits of herbs and spices pounded into the tender meat, remnants of what the menu assured was a three-hour marinade, and the entire thing was still sopping in its own juices.If this thing tasted half as good as it looked, his taste buds were about to be in Heaven.Logan placed the piece of meat into his mouth, and he instantly wanted another bite. Not only was the steak cooked to perfection, but the marinade and seasoning they used were out of this world. What
"He's glad Logan's having a good time," Logan winked at Ira through the rearview mirror. "He enjoyed himself, too.""It certainly sounded like it!" Ira giggled. "Logan ran him so hard, he thinks Logan may have given him bruises."Logan started to apologize. "He's sorry," he began. "I--""It's all part of the game, sweetie," Ira playfully explained. "He loves it."Rafe made another gagging sound and tossed his hand over his mouth. "Bro," he heaved, "he really enjoyed his steak. Please don't make it part of Shadow's interior.""Alright," Logan rolled his eyes at the goblin's words. "They can ease up on the sex talk for now.""Hell," Ira added, "he doesn't need to talk about it at all. It's all saved right up here in his noggin. Plus, he has plenty of mementos of last night all over his body."Rafe dry-heaved at the succubus's words, took a gulp, and then looked over at Logan again. "Ew," he gagged. "They say it tastes better going down the second time, but that is not true at all
Logan walked into his own dwelling and instantly began to undress. As he headed toward the walk-in closet at the far end of the room, he peeled off his shirt, pants, underwear, and socks, and tossed them one-by-one at the hamper on the other side of the room. Most of the articles of clothing were right on target, but he had to use his green Hellfire to redirect the flying pair of socks into the basket.“Three out of four isn’t bad,” he said aloud, even though there was nobody around to hear him.Logan rustled around in his oaken dresser for a moment, pulled out a pair of socks and underwear, and slid them onto his body. Once those were on, he waltzed over to the closet and admired his options.Luckily for him, the former owner of this mansion wore the same size as he did, and he was wealthy beyond imagination. All throughout the closet were articles of clothing that looked fairly normal upon first glance. However, knowing Robert Quinn, most of these outfits probably cost more t
“This thing is so badass!” Rafe was on the verge of tears as we sped down the highway. “So much better than that beat-up old rust bucket we used to call a vehicle.”“Lola?” Logan said in surprise. “I’m surprised you’d ever say a bad word about her.”“How dare you?” the goblin gasped. “Lola was the greatest sex wagon in the history of the planet Earth! I’m talking about Shadow.”“Right … ” Logan sighed.“Seriously, bro,” Rafe continued. “Why didn’t we take this thing out sooner?”“Because,” Logan explained and motioned to the backseat, “there’s barely any room in here. Look at how cramped it is with just the five of us.”Abina and Kelda were sitting in the back seat of the red Maserati GT with their legs nearly up to their chests. Meanwhile, Ira sat in the passenger seat, and Rafe sat on her lap.“You can’t tell me this is comfortable,” he pushed back at the goblin.“It’s not,” Rafe shook his head, “but it’s worth it. The chicks are gonna be all over the Rafester when we roll up in thi
“It was about time they got another vehicle,” Logan announced over Rafe’s theatrics. “With Beth taking over the Velvet Lips and Ira going to be on the campaign trail all the time, they can’t all rely on Shadow.”“What about us?” Kelda questioned sadly. “Will we have to go off on our own, too?”“Only if you want to,” Logan said with a soft smile into the rearview mirror. “Unlike their previous masters, he doesn’t give a damn what they decide to do. If they want to go off and have a career on their own, be his guest. If they want to hang around him for all of eternity, also be his guest. His elves are always free to do what they want!”“I want to stay around him,” Liby confirmed. “I’ll leave all these Earthly pleasures to my sisters.”“Glad to hear.” Logan nodded. “And who knows? Maybe after Azar is defeated once and for all, they can go retire to some quiet tropical island somewhere and spend the rest of their lives partying and soaking up the sun on the beach.”“That sounds mo