Logan shook his head and summoned red Magicfire into his hands. "I always hated this trope," he muttered to himself.“How big is Logan’s dick?” Ira asked out of the blue.Logan shot her a raised eyebrow, and the elves shrugged.“What?” she shrugged. “The real Kelda would know, wouldn’t she?”“Oh, it’s huge,” the blonde on the left mused.The other one looked Logan right in the eye and slowly began to pull down the waistband of her pants. “Yes, it’s much, much bigger than Azar’s,” she continued, “and Earl’s.”“Earl was an asshole,” the other Kelda continued. “He wasn’t as kind or as loving as you are, Logan. Can’t you see it’s me?”The elves on the right lowered her waistband down just far enough that her left thigh was exposed. There, right below her tiny waist, sat the scar from one of Earl’s torture sessions.It was her.“Honey,” the real Kelda hissed, “you don’t even know the half of it. Earl left his mark on me, in more ways than one.”“I know,” the “other Kelda” mused. “He to
"What happened?" Logan demanded. "Where the hell did they go?""I don't know, Logan," Abina sighed. "There were so many of them and only two of us.""I know, I know," Logan said and held out a comforting hand. "It's not your fault. We didn't know we were going to have company, especially not so many of them.""Do you think they were cultists?" Abina asked her sisters."I'm sure of it," Ira nodded. "They travel in packs, know how to cast powerful Magicfire magic, and they knew who we all were. They're definitely part of some demon-worshipping cult. The only question is, whose?"Logan stood back to his feet and tightened his fist. "I know exactly who can tell us," he growled and stomped back toward the door.The five of them ran back through the remnants of the club, back to where Aruna was still waiting patiently."Alright, Aruna, who were those people helping you?" Logan asked. "They were mortals. Are they part of some demon's cult?"Aruna chuckled. "You thought the Cult of Azar
"Come on," Logan tried to lighten the mood. "I'm a mortal going around killing demon lords and stealing their elves. There's no way he can hate you more than he hates me.""I wouldn't count on it," the fit elves responded. "It got so bad at one point, she was contemplating a coup. It would have been guaranteed suicide, a elves or two going up against a mighty Demon King, but at least she wouldn't have to tolerate that fucker's abuse anymore.""So Lucifer eventually moved her over to Azar's kingdom?" Logan continued."More or less," Kelda nodded. "At that point, though, it was just going from an awful situation to a slightly less awful one.""So like, thinking you're going to a crunkcore concert and then finding out you're really going to a nu-crunk one?" Rafe suggested."I don't know what either of those is," Kelda admitted."Good," the goblin shuddered. "Let's keep it that way.""Word was that it was a 'business decision,'" Abina added. "Lucifer was supposedly afraid Beelzebub wa
“I think he sees where Logan is going with this,” Logan nodded. “He thinks those guys they killed may have left their, uh, DNA inside some of the surviving members.”“Exactly,” Abina confirmed. “He knows. He's much smarter than he looks.”“So how do they cast this spell?” Logan asked the elves.“We need Rafe’s book,” Kelda explained. “The one that originally summoned Abina and Logan to Earth. Does Rafe still have it?”The goblin pondered for a moment and then grinned. “You of all people should know I treat that shit like a credit card,” the goblin snickered. “Never leave home without it. It’s back in Stella’s trunk.”“Excellent,” the elves nodded. “Then they need to get back to the vehicle immediately.”“They can’t just fly back over to where they parked,” Logan warned and pointed down at the commotion below. “There’s a ton of people down there. Cops, news crews, you name it. They can’t risk blowing their cover that badly.”“So what is he suggesting?” Rafe asked. “Does he want th
“Traveling with a demonic GPS,” Logan mused as they sped down the road. “I don’t know about you guys, but this is definitely a first for me.”“I’ve done tracking spells before,” Kelda admitted, “but they were never quite like this.”The piece of glowing fabric was floating in the air directly in front of their vehicle, dead-set on finding its target. The only issue was that it was speeding through the night like a bullet train, and they had to push their Maserati to the limits just to keep up. They whipped around a turn, and for a split second, Logan swore he felt the vehicle go up on two wheels.“This is so awesome!” Rafe exclaimed from Ira’s lap. “I feel like a super-spy, driving through the city at breakneck speeds late at night, off to save two damsels in distress. All I’m missing is my tuxedo.”“It looks like we’re headed toward the headquarters of the Servi Domini Nostri and the Pearly Gates,” Ira said as she studied a map on her screen.“Of course the one with the Latin nam
Logan couldn’t help but grin at the goblin's enthusiasm. “Lookin’ good, Rafe. Now get in there and whip us up a distraction. They’re probably hiding out in the basement.”“If only I had a jukebox to punch …” the goblin pondered as he opened the front doors and strutted inside.“Follow me,” Logan commanded the elves. “There’s got to be a back door we can use. We’ll wait for Rafe to distract the cultists and the demon, and then we’ll sneak in and set your sisters free.”They slunk back behind the yellowish-brown brick building, toward the entrance in the rear. The double glass doors were locked, but it was gonna take a lot more than that to keep out Logan Ralston.Logan closed his eyes, cast a quick spell of emerald over the elves and himself, and teleported them inside.The interior of the former church was laid out much like you’d expect of a local community center. These particular doors led them directly into the open stairwell of the building, and they were greeted with pale, c
"Civil?" Logan nodded cautiously. "Right. You must be Ukobach.""In the flesh." The demon sighed. "Look, Ralston, they can do this one of two ways. You and your friends can walk away, and all will be forgiven, or they can stay, and they'll be killed.""Tough words coming from a demon that looks like a bobblehead," Logan growled. "I'm not letting you kill Tris and Gula.""When will you mortals learn?" Ukobach said as he shook his head sadly. "They're going to drain those two elves of their power one way or another. In fact, adding five more deliciously powerful casualties to this endeavor would please their master greatly. He'd become more powerful than Azar could ever imagine!""I'm the one who needs to learn a lesson?" Logan scoffed. "Name one demon who's figured out how to beat me. Go ahead, I'll wait."The short demon snickered and shook his head. "You're just as cocky as Aruna warned us," he mused. "Where is the Rakshasi, anyways? Not dead, I hope. She was quite a lovely woman
His attack struck Ukobach directly in the stomach, and the small demon was thrown backward into the wall with a crash. Logan dashed across the room and slid to a stop right beside Rafe. “You alright, bro?” he asked the injured goblin.“Never better,” Rafe lied. “Although I did learn the Stone Cold Stunner isn’t as effective as it looks on TV.”Ukobach hopped back to his feet and readied his weapon.“What the heck is that, anyway?” Rafe asked. “Is that a fire poker? Who the heck uses a fire poker as their weapon of choice?”“If you must know,” the demon hissed, “it’s used to stoke the fires of Hell themselves. My trusty sidearm has served me well for centuries, and it will look simply marvelous with both of your heads mounted on top of it!”Ukobach let out a weak roar as he propelled himself through the air and swung at Logan with his red-hot iron. The little demon was quick, but Logan was much quicker. He caught the blow of the demon with a burst of violet fire, and then he blas