“We’ve been over this, Raph,” he spat. “According to the Light-Dark Accords of 1344, a warrant obtained from a mortal by a dark elve or other beings is valid. It’s no different than if he had invited me inside.” “That’s where you’re wrong, Azar.” The Light elve shook his head. “The Light realm-Dark realm Bilateral Amendments of 1561 clearly states that a warrant taken from a mortal via threat of violence constitutes extortion of the soul and is therefore non-binding!” “There was no threat of violence, was there, Beth?” the dark elve tried to argue. “You literally ripped the man in half and fed him to your demon horde.” Raph crossed his arms, not convinced. “Listen here, light man.” Azar pointed his clawed finger at the dark-haired man. “This mortal stole from me and then murdered my men. If that wasn’t bad enough, he had to go and make it personal. I’m going into this church, warrant or not!” “Bro,” Rafe whispered to Logan. “This is just like th
“It looks like they can all be horny together now!” Logan joked as he took out another cluster of monsters with his Magicfire. “That’s the Logan we know and love!” Abina smiled widely as she slammed a dark elve into the wall with her telekinesis and snapped his neck. A blast of what sounded like a trombone rang out, and the dark elves who were swarming the church froze. Without warning, the creatures left alive turned around and retreated back towards their master. Kelda and Abina flew up out of the missing ceiling to see what was going on while Rafe and Logan rushed out the front door. Raph had apparently recovered and made quick work of the dark elves, and he and Azar were locked in an epic duel on the outskirts of the church property. The LightDuke had ditched his robe. Now he wore a slick, white SWAT-like armor set complete with a bulletproof vest and weapons galore. Raph soared through the sky, borne by wings of brilliant, angelic white.
“I assumed you had a death wish when they told me you’d defeated Voidmoth,” Azar chuckled. “But I didn’t realize that you were this much of a masochist. I am the Master of Witchcraft and the Father of Warfare, and you are nothing more than another mortal who will soon be crushed under my foot!” Logan sneered, his voice dripping with contempt. “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, you Diablo fuck,” he retorted. “Voidmoth and Gallu said the exact same thing to me, and look where they are now.” The elve, Azar, let out a laugh, his eyes glowing a menacing red. “You amuse me, mortal,” he taunted. “It’s a shame that you’ll be nothing more than ashes in a few moments.” Without wasting any time, Logan conjured a ball of magicfire and hurled it directly at Azar’s face. The attack made contact with his left shoulder but failed to inflict any damage whatsoever. Amused, the demon clicked his tongue. He summoned his own massive fiery projectile and launched it toward Logan. Ju
“We?” Logan questioned. “The elves, the goblin, and myself,” he confirmed. “Raph, you have no idea how much I’d appreciate that right now!” Logan grunted as he tried to push back against the walls. His body was now in a near-fetal position. His temples began to throb, and he could feel a surge of newfound energy coursing through him. The shimmer of the white flame solidified into a sort of protective forcefield, and there was a deafening beating in his ears as it intensified. The energy shield expanded outwards, shattering Azar’s purple prison into a million pieces. “Round two, motherfucker!” Logan exclaimed as he fired off a blast of the white-hot energy. Azar threw up his sword to block, but the attack was too powerful. The demon cried out as he was tossed backward into the line of trees, downing nearly a dozen of them. Logan cast an emerald flame and transported himself over to Azar position before he could recover. As he appeared
“How are you feeling, Logan?” Beth asked as she put her hands behind her back bashfully. “I'm feels like a million bucks!” Logan exclaimed as he wrapped his arms around the short elve. Beth’s scent was incredibly sweet, filling his nostrils with a distinct cupcake-like aroma as he hovered over her hair. Despite her small size, he was cautious not to hug her too tightly, fearing she might break. He could feel the sensation of her erect nipples rubbing against his pectorals, causing a throbbing sensation down south. He knew it was time to end the hug before things escalated further.There would be plenty of time for that later. “Darn. Here I thought I was going to get to see the massive member that the other two were telling me all about,” Beth frowned and crossed her arms. “You elves are quite a strange breed,” Raph observed as he wiped dried demon blood off his knife. “Always with sin in your thoughts and on your minds.” “Don’t act like you don’t want
“Bro, I can’t believe we’re going to meet Lucas Lum,” the voice of Rafe the goblin snickered from behind the white tablecloth. “I love his movies! They’re some of the most fucked-up things I’ve ever seen. Over-the-top violence, sex, full-frontal nudity… It’s like a wishlist ripped straight out of my own mind.” “Enjoy his work while you can,” Logan replied with a chuckle as he gently leaned against the room service cart. “He’s dark elve and we’re going to drive him into an early retirement.” “Uh, Logan?” Rafe’s tiny paws brushed the tablecloth aside. “Are we going to poison his dinner or something? Why am I hiding in a room service cart? And what’s up with your fancy outfit?” For this occasion, Logan wore a white dress shirt with a black tie and black dress pants. It was simple, but it was the same uniform worn by employees of the Royal Palms Resort, so it made for the perfect disguise. Nobody had even tried to stop him when he waltzed into the kitchen area and
“That’s our cue,” Logan nodded to Rafe, reached up, and then grabbed a silver platter. “Ready to put on your disguise?” “Dude, playing food?” he said as he climbed up onto the top layer of the cart. “This is the role of a lifetime. Contrary to popular belief, Logan didn’t just sit backstage and smoke pot his entire time in Drama Club.” “Of course not, he also was back there eating anything edible,” Logan laughed as he opened the tray and the goblin hopped in. “Guilty as charged.” Rafe’s voice was cut off as Logan placed the lid over his small body. Logan took a deep breath and then began to push Rafe’s makeshift chariot toward Lum’s room. The wheels of the room service cart squealed as they rolled through the bowels of the resort. The concrete hallways were littered with trash, broken glassware, and more carts than one could ever possibly need. Then there was the smell, a mixture of sweet, discarded desserts from the function the night bef
“Of course I do.” Beth crossed her arms in annoyance. “I was—It’s just—” “I found it!” Rafe exclaimed as he came running back to their side with what Logan assumed was Lucas Lum’s cell phone in his hand. His actions brought everyone’s attention off Beth and onto the newfound clue. The goblin handed the device to Logan and he clicked the button on the side. “Damn, it’s locked,” Logan sighed. “Any ideas on what his password could be?” “That’s easy,” Rafe said, placing both hands on his hips. “Try ‘696969.’” “There is no way his password is ‘696969,’” Logan laughed as he punched in the numbers. “See? It’s—” The password was accepted, and he now had access to the phone of one of Hollywood’s biggest movie producers. “You can thank me later, bro,” Rafe chuckled. “Preferably with nachos.” “I guess pervs all think alike,” Kelda joked with an eye roll. “Seriously, I probably would have taken that asshole out even if he wasn’t a demon. Cr