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2024-10-29 19:42:56“Can Elves even get drunk?” Logan asked the two women across from him as his vision started to blur. The two women both shrugged before Abina spoke up. “Well, don’t you want to find out? I’m sure you’ve been with a million drunken mortals. Can you imagine what it would be like to be with two drunken, horny elves?”
They had fond their bar alright, and they had make use of the opportunity to get as close to drunk as they could. The humans anyway.
“Oh, I can imagine it alright,” Logan smirked as a hundred different images raced through his mind. “My only concern would be that you’d accidentally let loose your powers while we were in the middle of it.
‘Death by Orgasm’ isn’t exactly what I want on my tombstone.”
“That doesn’t happen,” Abina quipped. “Often.”
“Fuck it, it’s a risk I’m willing to take.” Logan slurred.
The bartender returned with another round of beers, and Logan don’t even remember finishing them. His senses started to feel like they were blending together. He could feel the loud music pounding in his head and he could nearly taste the cigarette smoke that wafted through the room. Maybe he just needed to get something in his stomach to counteract the alcohol.
He reached down to pull out his wallet so he could order us up some nachos and realized that seven dollar tortilla chips with cheese were a luxury he couldn’t afford. A sigh left my mouth as he grumpily tossed his wallet on the table.
“Perhaps we could be of assistance?” Keida suggested when she saw his frustration, and she motioned for the bartender to come over.
“There are… other ways of paying for things where we come from.”
“What can I do you for, doll?” the man asked Keida.
“Two orders of nachos, please. The saltier, the better,” she smirked.
“Sure thing! Do you want me to put this on his tab, or--” the man started to say.
Abina's violet eyes began to glow intensely as she leaned across the table and stared deeply into our server’s baby blues. “It would be very kind of you to give us those nachos free of charge.”
The bartender’s eyes narrowed into pinpricks as the dark-haired succubus’ spell washed over him. His entire body tensed up as Abina's words seemed to echo through his brain. The bartender’s eyes returned to normal, and he rubbed his head in confusion.
“I, uh…” he tripped over his words. “I’ll go get you those nachos.”
As he walked away, Keida gave me a devilish grin. “See? My sisters and I are quite persuasive.”
“Damn,” Logan laughed. “I should have asked you to order us a couple bottles of the high-end stuff!”
“Whoa, whoa!” Rafe's voice called up from below. “You got the party started without me?”
Logan stared down at his friend. “That must have been the longest leak in history. What were you doing in there? You know it counts as playing with yourself if you touch it more than twice, right?”
“If only!” the goblin laughed. “No, I just ran into some dude in there who wanted to ask me a bunch of questions. Really classy looking guy. He was far too sophisticated for this place. Anyways, I think he was totally jealous of my tan.”
In a buzzed movement, Logan swiped Rafe off the ground with both of his hands and held him in the air like he was showing him off.
“Who wouldn’t want to marvel at you? You magnificent little goblin!”
“Let’s play a game!” Abina said, and the four of them stumbled over to the dart board and tried our damnedest to get a game in.
Most of their throws ended up going completely off the mark and punched holes into the wooden wall. Rafe struggled particularly hard as he had to launch his darts at an upward angle. Even so, he was the only one that was landing any on the target. He wound up his next throw, pulled back, and released. Just as the dart was about to hit the second-to-last ring, Logan threw up a magic barrier and laughed ecstatically.
“One of these days, Logan. Straight to the moon!” he laughed as he shook his tiny fist at him.
They sauntered over to the pool table. Though the effects of the alcohol were now wearing off, Logan was still a bit too drunk to line up his shots. Keida and Abina didn’t seem buzzed though, and they each took turns caressing the pool cues and bending over the table suggestively before they made their shots. Pretty much every single patron in the bar was watching them play, and Logan felt a surge of pride in his chest when a pair of hard looking biker dudes raised their beer mugs to toast him across the room.
The food arrived after the women finished their first game, and we all scarfed down the salty nachos before playing again. The food helped with the buzz a bit, so Logan set up the pool table for another round.
Then Logan saw Keida and Abina both freeze in terror and dropped their pool cues when a well-dressed man walked toward us.
The man cast a long shadow that stretched across the bar from the setting sun. He walked with a peculiar gait, nearly hobbling as his shiny black shoes clunked across the sticky wooden floor. The figure looked like your average businessman, a gray suit on his body and sleek blond hair that appeared to have far too much product in it. What gave him away were his eyes, which shined a bright purple as they pierced into Logan's very soul.
“Hey,” Rafe said in a drunken stupor, “that’s the guy from the bathroom earlier.”
“Hello, Mr. Logan,” the man nodded calmly. “I am Lord Voidmoth, and I’m here to take back my elves.”
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“Ah, you’re the asshole that Abina and Keida don’t like,” Logan growled, taking an aggressive step forward. “What kinda name is Voidmoth, anyway?” Rafe slurred. “Is he gonna make me a sandwich?” “It’s an old Dark Elves house name, word for a warrior, if you must know,” the man, Voidmoth said. Eyes gleaming. “It’s super gayyy,” Rafe droned. “Gaaaaayyyyyyyy.” “But my name is irrelevant now,” Voidmoth hissed as he ran his hands through his perfect blonde hair and turned to Logan. “The thing is, Mr. Ralston, you have two of my dark Elves. Two of my best ones, I might add. They were supposed to fulfill their duties to you and your friend and then return to us. Thousands of people out there ask for their services by the hour, you know. What kind of businessman would I be if I denied them their wishes?” “Abina and Keida want to stay here with me,” Logan said flatly, making his face expressionless. He was trying to act cool,
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Logan's flames began to glow with purple light even though he was readying an attack. That was odd, but he didn’t have time to think about it because Voidmoth was already starting to recover. Logan flung his hands out and unleashed a blast of purple-tinged fire that completely engulfed the demonic pimp. “It’s going to take a lot more than that to kill the Servant of dark realm!” Voidmoth’s voice boomed as he stepped forth from the raging inferno Logan unleashed. His clothes were singed, and his flesh looked a bit charbroiled, but as he paused to straighten his tie, Logan realized the wounds were already starting to heal. Before he had a chance to react, Voidmoth flung another one of his fireballs at them. A shot of purple flame sprang from Keida and Abina as wings sprouted from their backs. “We have to run!” Keida cried as she grabbed Logan by the scruff of the neck and hauled him out of the way. The ceiling of the bar was fairly low, but she was able to fly
Dark Elves Harem Chapter 9
Straight from the bar, they boarded the subway and took it to the most run-down part of the city that they could think of. This place might have been a sprawling metropolis, but it still had its hardships. Logan lived in one of the more run-down parts of town, but their current location made his home look like a luxury resort. This part of the city used to be the home of dozens of factories that employed thousands of people, but once those companies began to outsource for cheaper labor, the people here were left jobless and hopeless. The sight made Logan appreciate what little he had even more. A few blocks down from the subway station stood an old house that looked like it had been abandoned for decades. Pieces of its original brick exterior had fallen off and were now laying in the overgrown grass of the lawn. Several of the windows were boarded shut, and the ones that weren’t probably should have been, considering they were now broken beyond repair. As they w
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Logan hesitated to open his eyes. The sounds of harrowed screams pounded in his eardrums in the distance, and he was now even more wary to see what he had done. His eyes popped open. The scene was surreal, like something out of a Dali painting. He was still in the house with Kelda, Abina, and Rafe, but the entire world appeared to be distorted and staticky. The images of his three friends were frozen in place. Rafe looked like he was seeing him in a funhouse mirror as the normally three-foot tall goblin towered above him. Kelda’s athletic frame was widened to the extreme, and Abina’s face looked like it was melting. Was this purgatory? “Logan…” an unseen voice whispered through the sounds of the screaming. “Who’s there?” Logan called out though he figured it was probably in vain. “Come with us, Logan…” The voice was distinctly female, but he still couldn’t see anybody. Then he saw it. Out of the corner of his eye, the figure of a woman dashed past his pos
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“You probably won’t be surprised by this whatsoever,” Keida said as she helped pack a few of Logan’s belongings into the suitcase he’d had since he was in fifth grade, “but it’s a common place for us elve to be summoned. Sin City and all.” “That actually does surprise me,” Logan questioned the elve with a raised eyebrow. “Prostitution is totally legal there. A sex partner isn’t exactly hard to come by.” Abina bit her lip seductively. “Mortal women don’t fulfill the same desires as we can, but you already know all about that, don’t you?” “You’ll hear no argument from me,” Logan chuckled in agreement. Keida, Abina, and Logan had a pretty simple relationship. They were happy as long as he was happy, and he was happy as long as they were happy. The only issue was that their former master, a elve lord who could summon literal Magicfire, wanted them back, and wanted Logan dead. And he wasn’t going to let that happen. Once t
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“This is nothing like our home. The dark realm of the dark elves doesn’t have these beautiful stars in the sky or those cute looking spiny plants along the side of the road. Or those adorable animals we keep passing. Our wildlife is a little more… Intimidating, to say the least,” she smiled as she pointed at a pronghorn in their headlights. Logan asked, somewhat afraid of what she would answer, “So… what does Hell look like, have you been to the the realm?” “Let’s hope you never find out,” Kelda warned. According to the videos he had seen, the people who had died and come back to life all described it as something different, like it was tailor-made to their darkest fears or whatever, the imp spoke as he rolled another joint.“That’s just for the people who are sent there for judgment. Demons and people of power see it for what it really is…” Kelda’s words trailed off. “How about some music?” Logan mused as he tried to change the subject. It was already
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“I can’t believe it. I hope we have this sort of luck in Vegas,” he said, shaking his head in disbelief. Rafe joked, “Who’s we? It was my idea to get the tickets.” Logan’s entire body shook with excitement as he imagined the possibilities. “No more stale cornflakes for us, that’s for sure! Maybe we won’t even need to use Liby’s mind control powers as much. If we win big, we’ll actually be able to afford to pay for the top-quality shit.” Abina pouted playfully, “That would be a shame. I actually like using my influence to help you get what you want. I’d do anything for my new master.” “As would I,” Kelda chimed in happily. Logan glanced down at his watch. “We’re about two hours out from Vegas. Once we get there, we’re going to get completely wrapped up in all the gambling and bright lights and cool shit that happens there, but we can’t forget about Voidmoth. It’s t-minus forty-five hours until he makes his appearance again. We should at least go into th
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The goblin giggled as he urinated onto the embers, turning them into smoking charcoal. All Logan could do was roll his eyes and turn back towards the car. Hopefully, the goblin would be done in a second or two. Goblin bladders couldn’t be that full. Logan carefully opened the door of Lola and slid down in front of the dash. The two naked elves were still huddled up together where they had been making love, and Logan cringed as he twisted the key, hoping the sound wouldn’t wake them. Once Lola’s start-up noises had died down to a dull purr, and his two lovers still hadn’t awoken, he let out a sigh of relief. Rafe, on the other hand, was not so quiet. From across the way, the goblin took off at full speed towards the vehicle. Once he was about four feet from the Volvo, he leapt up into the air. The goblin slid through the open window of Lola and plopped down into the seat beside them. “I’ve always wanted to do that, but my mushy mortal man-body wouldn’t let
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The moderator completely ignored the politician’s words and nodded for Ira to continue. “Thanks, Jim,” she retorted. Ira grabbed the mic off the podium and began to walk around the stage gingerly. “My fellow Arizonians,” she explained. “The reason I bring this up here, in front of you, is because I don’t want my opponent to weasel his way out of these accusations behind a PR team. There’s far too much of that in the political world. No, Bill, I want you to face the music here, in front of our constituents.”“About what?” Hoggins chuckled awkwardly. “So I was a male prostitute? So what? As you said, all of my clients were consenting adults.”Ira shot the man an angry look and tightened her grip on the microphone. “That’s not what I’m talking about, and you know it. You see, being the businessman that he is, Mr. Hoggins just had to have his cake and eat it too. He was much more than a prostitute, my friends. He built an entire sex worker empire up there in Vegas.”“Lies!
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“Political Dominatrix?” Logan questioned. “Do I even want to know?” “Yeah, bro,” Rafe explained. “It’s totally the standard outfit of politicians. I call it that because the people that wear it like to put it on while they fuck us senseless.”“Is that what being a politician is?” Tris asked, surprised. “No wonder Ira was always so engaged with Marvin Franklin’s campaign.”“It’s a metaphor,” Logan sighed. “Like, the politicians are fucking over the people.”“I’m not using a metaphor,” Rafe argued. “They’re literally fucking us in a bareback, raw-dog, ‘bite the pillow’ sort of way.”“That sounds right up Ira’s alley.” Tris nodded in agreement.“And now, Mr. Hoggins’ opponent,” the moderator interrupted. “Former wife of Marvin Franklin, the man who used to represent the seventh district, Maggie Franklin!”The crowd applauded for Ira but not nearly as much as they had for Hoggins. To make up for the lack of enthuBethsm, Rafe, the elves, and Logan all made sure to hoot and holler as lou
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Wearing a tuxedo generally went a long way in improving Logan's mood, and tonight was no different. He sat there at the massive round table, decked out in a jet-black tux complete with its own vest and bowtie. This was a black-tie affair, and Logan was never one to come underdressed.Luckily for him, neither were any of his friends.Logan's friend Libidine sat directly next to him at the round table, and it was taking everything in his power to keep from gawking at her perfect and massive breasts. The succubus wore a sparkly silver dress that had a wide, plunging neckline. If it weren't for the dress's halter top, her delicious boobs would have been flopping out all over the place.Of course, Logan wouldn't have complained if they were.Then there was Cupi. Surprisingly, the Sister of Greed had little to no interest in fashion, but she was still dressed to the nines. The fit succubus wore a tight red dress with an off-shoulder neckline that ran all the way down to her knees. It had th
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The assassin’s body was now bubbling like crazy, and some of the boils were growing to nearly the size of a baseball. His face began to contort into an unrecognizable, abstract horror, and then his torso began to expand. “Oh shit!” Rafe exclaimed. “He’s gonna go Big Trouble in Little China on us. Hit the deck!” Logan and the others dove to the ground, and then there was a loud, sloppy-sounding pop. Logan could feel the chunks of gooey gore crash into his body, and he was nearly mortified. He pulled himself to his feet and observed the scene.The assassin’s body was completely gone, or more accurately, it was scattered all across the inside of the Cult of Ralston’s headquarters. Pieces of furry spider flesh ran down the walls and left a trail of green gore in its wake. The assassin's organs were spread across the ground at various intervals.This place was going to need a real deep cleaning as soon as possible. Logan nearly gagged as he wiped the slimy remains of the creature off
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As Logan ran towards the assailant, he drew the jagged remains of his goat-headed dagger from his belt, ran his Magicfire-covered hand over the base of the blade, and enchanted it. The jagged, broken steel stretched out into a fiery cutlass, and he readied his weapon for the assault. The spider-creature threw out the pointy end of its leg in his direction. He was probably hoping that Logan would run into the point and skewer himself, but luckily for Logan, he wasn't that stupid. Instead, Logan twisted his glowing blade and parried the deadly appendage away with a flick of his wrist. He ducked down, spun around, and lopped off another one of the creature's back legs. As the spider-demon fell awkwardly onto its knees, Logan saw a. flash of Abina's polearm as the blunt end shot up and struck him in the chin. Green mist sprayed upward, and the demon was now dripping its own sludge-like blood out of its mouth. Logan wasted no time in thrusting his sword in the direction o
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Logan surveyed the battlefield around him and saw that, despite their best efforts, the army of oversized spiders was quickly overwhelming them. They were already halfway up Raphael’s body, and they had Gula nearly completely covered with their horrid wave. It was like they kept multiplying faster than they could kill them. “Precision strike?” Rafe suggested. Logan nodded to the goblin, and then they both ran toward their friends. He created a series of ascending platforms for the goblin to climb, and he acrobatically hopped up the makeshift stairs with ease. Once he was at the top, he flipped up into the sky above Gula and rained down a hailstorm of tiny balls of Magicfire. The spiders screamed as they were burned off the elves’ torso and arms.Once she had her upper body free, Gula took a swing with her enchanted battle axe. Chunks of spider and greenish blood flew up into the sky, and then the elves was free.“Save Abina,” Logan nodded to the redhead as he dashed toward Kelda
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Logan started to take a step toward one of the two gentlemen, but then he froze. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but something was off about these two.When the boys moved, it was almost like they were suspended like marionettes on strings. Then there were their voices, which seemed devoid of all emotions even though they wore large smiles on their faces.Something wasn't right here.“Actually, I think I'm gonna stay over here,” Logan explained. “But you boys are more than welcome to tell me all about the ‘good news’ from a distance.”The boy on the left looked at his friend. “I was afraid he'd say that.” He sighed and then turned back to them. “The good news is that we finally found you, Logan Ralston.”In an instant, the two creepy-looking young men began to glow with a black ectoplasmic substance. They reached out and took each other's hands, and then their bodies began to meld together into one large, ominous blob. Finally, the magical nebula began to take on a
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“What’s the matter?” Logan asked with a grin. “Are you shy?”The redhead snorted. “Anything but,” she argued. “It’s just… I don’t know… I feel like Sister Abina and Sister Kelda are putting a lot of pressure on me to hook up with you.”“Really?” Logan noted sarcastically. “I didn’t notice.”They passed by a few of the offices of the lower-level cult members, and then they were at the computer room. Logan stepped aside and let the elves enter the room first.“Well… I want to,” Gula continued. “I really, really want to. But--”“You want to ease into things,” Logan finished her sentence. “I get it, Gula. We don’t have to rush into that if you’re not ready.”“What?” the Sister of Gluttony asked with a confused quirk of her lips. “That’s not what I meant at all.”“What did you mean, then?” Logan questioned.Gula looked down at the ground bashfully and then turned her head up to stare him in the eyes. The elves bit her lip, and Logan could see that her nipples were growing erec
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Shadow sped through the streets of Phoenix, under cover of the dark desert night. The second that Rafe and Tris had returned from their munchie run, Logan snagged the keys to the vehicle and decided to head toward his cult’s hideout. If they really were going to be tracking down a missing Archangel, rallying his cultists was probably the best place to start. “I still don’t get why you didn’t just call Oliver,” Rafe muttered from the middle seat. “It would have saved me from being uncomfortably smashed between two guys for an entire car ride. I think I’ve had to say ‘no homo’ more times today than I have in my entire life.” “Doubtful,” Raphael uttered under his breath. “What’d you say, angel boy?” Rafe demanded. “We may be best buds, but don’t think I won’t give you the ol’ one-two, one-two if you get outta line.” “Of course,” the Archangel said with a coy smile. “I’d never think of insulting you, Rafe.” “Damn straight,” the goblin nodded, “but, as the leader of this group, I’ll le
