In This Life I Will Be Strong

Chapter 1

Is this what death feels like? It's so painful that you can't move your whole body. Not only that, the pain in his whole body slowly disappeared.

It felt as if Samuel had lost all his senses.

Sreet!

Sreet!

"Hey, do I have to keep dragging this blood-smelling body? Come on, I'm tired too!" said the man in the school uniform who was dragging Samuel's body.

"Shut up, if we get caught, we'll be in trouble," another man replied with a scared look on his face.

"If you get caught, what will you do, a poor student who has no one? No one will protest if someone finds his body. Even if they do, we can just give him money and that's it," the man standing in the middle said as well, his haughty face very obvious.

Did they think Samuel was dead? 

Considering he couldn't do anything but stare, it seemed natural to think he was gone. Samuel realized he was on the verge of death. His eyes might close in the next few minutes.

He could no longer open them to see textbooks, plants, and people. Samuel finally felt the end of the world.

"Did you finish digging the hole? It took you so long, you're an earth-type witch, aren't you? Why did it take you so long to make a small grave? You idiot!" the haughty student glared at the two friends who were trying to dig the ground with magic.

"The ground here is hard, be patient. If you don't want to help, at least don't be a loudmouth, okay? Tsk, annoying," said the student who had dragged Samuel's body.

"What, you dare to talk back to me?! A stupid and silly student like you dares to say such a thing, I'll burn your body right now!" the haughty face shouted with a ball of fire in his hand.

"I've been holding back for a long time, you really are an annoying boy. If I had to choose, Samuel is better than you. At least he doesn't say offensive things. You arrogant kid!" the disciple also cast earth magic.

"Hey, never mind you guys. Don't fight here, please keep your temper today. We have to unite to bury this guy's body," the scared student tried to mediate between them.

Samuel should be happy or sad about this fight. 

Happy because it would slow down the burial that there might be passersby. Sad at the thought of passersby taking the side of these people.

Samuel felt confused on the brink of death. Not calm as the book said.

In the book Samuel read, people on the verge of death would usually feel calm slowly. This is inevitable because it is too late to want to come back to life. So only acceptance has to be done.

Huh, if Samuel could feel like that. Accepting and leaving quietly, surely he wouldn't feel hatred now. Hate for them and the people who ignored Samuel.

This hatred made Samuel hopeful again. After all this time, he wanted to live. Anytime, as long as he was alive in this world. As long as the people here were still alive.

Samuel longed to get even with them. Crueler and sweeter, until they themselves wished for death.

God, please grant Samuel's wish just this once!

"His eyes are still open, is he still alive?" asked the frightened student.

"No way, close his eyes if you're afraid. Let's bury him, it's all done," the dragon approached Samuel.

The frightened student did as his friend said. He closed Samuel's eyes with a gentle rub. This was different from his usual behavior of rubbing roughly or with sharp objects.

How could Samuel be happy about this? He was a little grateful that for the first time the hand did not make his face bleed. But this treatment was the last before Samuel closed his eyes.

He was leaving behind a cruel world.

It was so unfair that Samuel's wish was not granted this time. Nothing was different than before.

Still, he was grateful to feel the cold. Yes, the feeling of being exposed to water for a long time came back. It reminded Samuel of the first bullying by the three students who killed him.

"He's really messed up, hahaha. We should get out of here soon."

"Hahaha, poor kid."

Huh? A male voice?

Could it be that the afterlife was so dark that there was a male voice? The temperature was cold, and Samuel's clothes were wet. Really wet, like water.

That couldn't be.

"This? What is that?" asked Samuel, feeling his face covered by the object.

It was hard to believe as the bucket covering Samuel's head came off. The view of the men's room was the only thing he could see, and his first grade uniform was soaked. 

Samuel's current state was not like the afterlife.

"Aw! This hurts, this can't be a dream. In the afterlife it's also impossible to show memories during life, is it possible ...." Samuel whimpered as he pinched his cheek hard.

Samuel slowly stood up and approached the glass that showed his fifteen year old self. An age younger than when he was killed by that damn student.

There was something different too, back then Samuel couldn't see without his glasses. Now his vision was normal without the glasses. 

It was really strange.

"Is it me? This is unbelievable, how can I be here? In the five years before I was killed. Is someone playing with my mind? Tsk, why can't you just let me go?" Samuel rubbed his face in annoyance.

Whoever was playing tricks on Samuel needed to be taught a lesson - if nothing else, to respect others.

Would Samuel's thoughts ever come true? He couldn't even live anymore, how could he make that happen? Apart from him, there was no one else.

For Samuel, no one could be trusted except himself. Everyone is an enemy. They only side with the powerful.

For a poor student like Samuel, not being bullied is already a precious miracle. 

It was better to be ignored than for people to see him being bullied.

"Samuel, can you listen, Mommy?"

Who? A woman's voice? Had a woman snuck into the men's room?

Samuel checked to see if there was a woman in the bathroom, to no avail. There was no one there but him. If there really was no one, perhaps this was one of someone's illusionary spells.

The person who had put Samuel in this situation.

"Look at the necklace you're wearing, that sound is coming from it."

The woman's voice came back. She said it as if she knew Samuel's confusion.

Sure enough, the half-wing shaped necklace was bright red. As the stranger said, the voice was coming from the necklace his mother had given him.

And then Samuel remembered the last word in the first sentence, mother. Was this person the mother Samuel had never seen?

"Who are you? Are you the one who cast the illusionary spell on me? Please let me die in peace. It will be useless to do anything to me," Samuel said, picking up his cracked glasses.

"Does my son want to die without revenge?"