So many things in life can just never go the way that you want them to. It does not matter if you have been good person or how hard you tried. So many calls the events of life that happen with no regard fate. Well, if this is fate then I do not want any part of it. I want nothing more than to go against fate and go after what I want. I just do not have what it takes to hurt people. All I want in this life is love and even that has been denied to me. As I lay on my kang and ponder the way the world revolves I am filled with a sad melancholy of what has become my life. Today is my wedding day. I always imagined that on this day I would be filled with excitement to be pledging my life to another for eternity. It is sad to say but in this moment, I feel nothing. For the last view days, I have found that I am unable to dredge up any emotion. I am just being the good boy who listens and follows directions. Without her this is what my life has become. She left without a word. Just one sm
I have so many things running through my mind at the moment that I do not know how to feel. My world was rocked on its axis when I found out about his engagement. Now he has told me that the entire time he has been fighting against it, but his mother had her own agenda. For the moment, my anger breaks, and tears spring to my eyes. What could I have done to deserve such a fate? Why did it take him so long to come to me? I cant voice any of these questions as deep sobs are being wrenched from my throat at the pain I feel. I thought I had lost him. I never knew that something in this world could cause me so much pain. I feel Draco wrap his arms around me as I cry. Seeking comfort to my chaotic emotions I turn into his arms. I use him as my piece of solace as I try to let go of the pain. We sit down as he hums our song trying to soothe me further. Soon my tears dry up and all I sense is quiet. My heart is no longer kissing in my chest. For days I felt like my world was ending.
The day four weeks ago still stays on repeat in my head. I have sat in his room since surrounded by all his things. In the evenings I sit in the sitting room and replay our conversations by the fire. I have cried at the pain I feel all this time. My boy is gone, and I have no one to blame for him leaving but myself. I have not spoken to anyone since that day. I live in the memories of my son. That day when Draco pushed me away after he found out the truth I had remained seated in my pride. I was hurt that he would speak to me, the woman who birthed him, in such a way. Normally, when he is hurt he runs to his tree to have some time to himself. I thought that he would go there to think and to get over what he had heard. As his ma I should have known that this time would be different. I had dismissed my lady maid as soon as Draco left the room so I could have time to think to myself. For a few moments I felt guilty at what I had done. That feeling was however fleeting and I soon ro
Ahead on the slowly inclining slope we here a voice raised in the air. As we take a pause listening the night goes quiet. The guards signal us with a raised fist in the air to hold our positions. After a few seconds, their hands lower and we take a few steps. “Somebody please. Somebody please help me. Oh god, please. Please help me” Someone screams. The old man must know the scream because once he hears it he begins to run up the slope faster than I have seen someone his age move. The guards quickly rush after him with Santo-San behind him as they go. As we hear the cave I can hear a girl crying and as we reach the caves entrance a horrible scream pierces the air. With the guards at the ready in front of us there is a pause at the entrance of the cave in the dim light. To my left a lantern barely flickers. As I approach the men in front of me to see what has them so captured. I see the girl holding something. As I my eye adjust from the moonlight to the dim light of the cave I r
As I come out of my memories from the past I find that I am still confused. I have more than paid my dues for the death of the boy that I love. The day I visited his mother at their estate I can still hardly remember after all this time. I remember telling her about the child as I fought the waves that had surrounded me in a deafening wave. The rest of that night as well as many nights are a blur to me now. “What am I supposed to do Draco? I do not know what your mother wants from me. I just want to rest and for this torment to end. I am so tired” I plead in the night to the statue of the boy I love. When I awoke the next morning after visiting his mother, I was in the middle of no where far from home. I laid naked in a field in extreme pain and disoriented. When I rose to stand I put my hands on my stomach only to find it flat. I cried as I realized that somehow I had lost my child. I wanted to return home, but I had no direction to where my home was. I remember walking for day
I have experienced a lot in the twenty-five years I have had on this earth. Everyone knows the day I was born. They know where I lived and what I looked like. My adoptive parents were visited for years so others could ask questions about me. Everyone in the world was curious about the baby girl who hatched out of an egg filmed live to the world. People knew my name but because most didn't talk to me directly, I was alone.On the night I was born the world was in a state of shock when so many children hatched from eggs all across the world. We were all different shapes and sizes. What made us stand out from the rest were the unique features that we had. For some of us it was the startling beauty of our eyes. For others was their size or abilities that could be seen right away. The thing that made me stand out was my hair. It was a deep coal black with unnatural red streaks.A week before my sixth birthday my whole life changed. The home of my adoptive parents caught fire. Somehow I was
Anger is such a powerful emotion. It fuels our feelings and actions, making us do things that we never imagined. It grows beyond the bounds. It festers and can be all encompassing. Everyone experiences it. Everyone has reveled in the power it can bring. Or the fear and the weakness it shows to those on the hunt. It is so easily used against those that cannot control its fury and, in the end, becomes their greatest doom. It became mine. As I stand on a hotel balcony, the world is blanketed in the mystery of the black night sky. The brightness of the thousands of stars I see shimmering bring to heart feelings of such great sorrow. Each of those beautiful spheres are the blazes of the fires of the many loves I had during my long life and what became of them. Some of the loves came by choice while others I was consumed with an undeniable hunger to have. They remind me of the regret and love I am filled with, for they are the souls of the children that I will never meet. But alas
The story of my love begins exactly eighteen years from that sorrowful day. My birthday. My father and I were sitting at our meager dinner table made of wood that we had kept through the years. A giant rice cake sat in the middle of the table as we chatted about the new parchment, he got me from town last week. He may not have been able to send me to school but over the years he passed on his and my mother’s love of reading to me. As our conversation over the parchment ended my father excused himself to his room and returned with a package which resembled the size of our face basin. When I first saw the package, I was a little filled with disappointment because what I desired was an adventure as my gift. I wanted more than anything to go to the celebration of Hanami tomorrow. It was a celebration that the main village threw every year for all to attend to watch the cherry blossoms bloom. We saw it as a time of renewal and a reminder to enjoy the fleeting nature of life. The b