Gerald looks a bit surprised at the long apology, I don’t know what he thought I might tell him if I did come to apologize. Maybe he thought I’d try to excuse my behavior in some way.But I don’t want to do that. I want him to know that he means too much for me to treat him so lowly despite what I did in the morning. I want him to know that I value him, and even if sometimes I act and talk like a vicious idiot, I would never undermine his importance.Gerald gets up from his seat, and round the desk. Then, he approaches me. For some reason, I brace myself, wondering if he’d slap me. He wouldn’t be entirely wrong if he does.But to my surprise, he steps in front of me and encircles me with his arms.Gerald hugs me, his frame an inch or two shorter than mine, and I feel like a lost little boy who had just found a home. My eyes start to itch from suddenly getting wet and I valiantly keep the tears down from flowing down my cheeks. I know that if I let them flow, I’m going to start to blub
“You look like someone pissed in your cereal,” Lemon comments when he finds me curled up on the couch in front of a fireplace, the very crouch where I once kissed Coraline. “Also, dude, are you drinking? I thought you didn’t like drinking!”I’ve got a bottle of wine clutched in my hand, and the taste of the tart red liquid on my tongue and lips. At any other time, it would be disgusting to me, but this time, the liquid feels like nectar from the gods. There’s a bottle of whiskey in front of me on the coffee table, but even in my misery I still haven’t worked up the courage to touch that. Besides, I’m pretty sure the wine will knock me out just fine, me being such a puny lightweight.I still hadn’t even drunk more than three gulps from the bottle, yet already feel buzzed. So, yeah, no worries there.I boggle my head to glance at Lemon who looks at me with an expression that’s between surprise and worry and get the sudden urge to laugh because of the sheer ridiculousness and disbelief a
“Jace!” My father’s voice comes in a bellow that wakes me up from the light sleep I’d finally fallen into after one whole night of tossing and turning in my bed. I shoot out of the bed at the sheer volume of the proclamation and immediately get reminded why such an idea could be considered really bad for a man with my predicament.I moan as I hold my pounding head in between my arms, feeling a thousand hammers pummeling me from the inside of my skull, and close my eyes tightly because the brightness burns my corneas.My mouth is drier than the Sahara Desert, and I smell like a dumpster truck full of week-old cat food. I feel like all kinds of shit I could even think of, which is not a pleasant image, at all.As I hold my head and try to get ahold of myself, I get reminded of why I’m in this position in the first place. And just as quickly, all the feelings I’d subconsciously tried to keep at bay returned, and there was nothing I want to do than succumb back into the blanket nest I’d f
It’s so weird to see my dad cook.No, scratch that it’s so weird to see my dad do anything mundane, period. I feel like I’m watching someone else utter around the kitchen, opening the cupboards as well as the refrigerator to see what’s in them and taking out various ingredients to see if it’s expired or not before placing them on the counter. It’s clear that the man is not familiar with his own kitchen, but it seems like he has some kind of an idea about what he's doing, so I sit quietly and let him work.That's until I start to see a pattern in the things he keeps pulling out.“Are you going to make freaking spaghetti?!” I ask him, raising both my brows, and he gives me a look.“Yeah, you got anything against it?”“Not really, but it’s still not even afternoon yet,” I protest, “it feels wrong.”My father tsks, “well, tough, Jace, because it’s one of the things I could make without burning the house down or giving people food poisoning. It’s either this or egg, but someone has forgott
Out of all the people to appear out of thin air and get me out of the funk I found myself in, my father was the last person on the list. Even if he made the list.But that is what happened. He fed me some passable spaghetti, and made me wash the dishes while he helped himself to some of the brandy from a bottle I’d opened, grumbling about me breaking into his prized collection even after I begrudgingly apologized, egging me on to call the university and cite reasons for my absence because apparently, they’d been trying to reach me after noticing that I had been skipping classes, but because I’d neglected all my calls whenever I saw they weren’t from Coraline and he even made sure that I called my friends so I could burrow their notes.I lied and told Mal, Louise, and Annabelle that I’d been down with the flu, and then politely turned down their offers to come to visit with food. I did not want anyone to know that I’ve been wallowing after a breakup like some teen girl in a coming-of-a
I try to call Coraline from all the communications devices we have at home, and when they don’t work, burrow the ones that even the security team has.But none of the calls connect through, and the automatic voice from the other side says that Coraline’s phone is out of range or turned off. None of the texts I send gets seen, much lead read.“This is not good,” I say to Gerald, calling her number for the hundredth time, this time from a new phone I just brought from a shop. My mind races, frantic, trying not to come up with eh worst scenarios possible for the lack of contact, but I cannot torture myself that way without having the evidence to back it up, so I hold it wall at bay. But by now, my hands and voice are shaking like a young leaf in the wind, and I feel like throwing up. The light-heartedness I’d started to feel before Lemon’s call came has disappeared, gone in the wind. Now only dread remains, and it makes my blood run colder with every failed attempt to get in touch with t
If it’s any other time, I would be mortified at having left the house in nothing but a t-shirt and a pair of pajama pants with a pair of cracks on my feet. I don’t even feel the chill in the evening as I rush towards the car my father had decided to drive rather than use a driver until Gerald comes behind me, looking utterly exasperated with it all while looking worried, which results in a strange expression overall.“Jace, for the love of God take your wallet and your phone! What if Coraline tries to contact you out of wherever she is? Also, wear these socks, we don’t want you ending up sick on top of it all!” he shoves everything he’d just named at my hands, huffing under his breath about stupid friends and their kids as he rushed past me.“Right, sorry,” I reply quietly, feeling emotions swell within me, and follow him to the car Gerald gets in the passenger seat next to my father rather than me like usual, but this time I’m thankful for that, because there are currently tears runn
“When was the last time either of you saw her?” I ask Mr. and Mrs. Granger, sitting around their dinner table. The sense of déjà vu strikes me again, and I’m reminded of the last time we’d been here, at the dinner which changed the course of our lives. Before the dinner, Coraline and I didn’t have the problems that eventually drove us apart. But after that, I got obsessed with Astra Development and its harassment. This was our cracking point.And we haven’t even been that long still. So, yes, I could understand where Coraline had been coming from before. It was so early in the relationship, but I was already sneaking around and breaking her trust. Now when it’s too late, I understand how that must’ve affected her as much as it did.If only I could just go back in time to fix it all, maybe Coraline would still be here.“This morning,” answers Mrs. Granger, “she was…not as upset as she was in the last two days, but she still had an air of melancholy to her.” I swallow the apologies lodg