"~I'm so tired...sheep are counting me~"I stood, staring at them wide-eyed."You've got to be joking", I muttered.But of course, they didn't look like they were. I had to wonder why I was the one who had to do it. This wasn't making any sense."This isn't the matter of whether someone else will or not. They simply can't. Besides, this is Prophet's choice. He is the one that picked you, wouldn't let him down now, would you?"That wasn't even an adequate excuse. Chopper looked right at me."You need a hand, kid?", his look made me go cold. I looked down, all the strength in me left me. The sun was racing down, I felt my spirit leaving along with it. My feet were heavy when I turned back and took a step towards Prophet.The sound every muscle in my body made as I walked over to him, the ground pressing beneath my feet, the air passing through my hair, drops of sweat on my forehead, the coldness of shivers running down my spine, my tongue running over my dry lips, my eyes struggling to
Another chapter of my life had come to a close. I must admit, I didn't get out of this one unscathed. In fact, I was brutally trodden upon from all sides. I yearned for rest, there really wasn't anything I could have asked for back then. But Valhalla was always in a turmoil.I had limited myself to my chamber most of the time, other times I rigorously trained. These honing sessions weren't short of torture but no one dared interfere and say anything to me. In fact, I rarely spoke a word at all to anyone. To me it seemed, no one else conversed either. Through my small circular window, I could view Lady standing at Prophet's grave everyday. She'd be emptily staring at the sky.The sky hadn't been very bright for such a long time, at first it was a terribly dull gray but now it had found a hint of crimson which seemed to be contaminating the gray exceedingly with every passing day. No one knew what was causing such a red sky and many people conjectured it to be the end of the world. I co
I lifted my foot which had just pulverized some burnt wood into the ground. The smell of that town was magnificent, like cooking hotpot on a rainy winter day. This piece of wood too, had once been a part of one of these vacant houses which harbored such hotpots. I remembered the last town Azag had run dry, this one reminded me of the same thing. We were likely to find some skeletons or similar remains here too. However, unlike last time, the sight didn't unsettle me one bit. There weren't a lot of things that moved me like that anymore. I was following Chopper's lead, who didn't seem to bat an eye on small things like that. I figured he'd already seen what was there to see here. Instead, he looked rather concerned about something else entirely. He turned to look at me more than once, as if searching for something. But when he wouldn't find it, he'd assume an annoyed look and look away. He never made any effort to hide his agitation. He was perhaps too preoccupied to try to conceal a
The wind that silently blew between us was teeming with ash and a dry smell of rain. It was screaming of emptiness, the most gray it had ever been.I, on the other hand, had about had enough of real and fake. I was quick to turn Chopper's claim down. He claimed that this was different from before, but I was just about ready to up and leave if he went on with that any longer."This seems real enough to me", I answered in a low voice.He looked about, concerned, perhaps seeking some thread to grab. I, seeing the opportunity at hand, went in for a jab right in his face. He managed to not just dodge it, but landed a clip round my ear instead. I almost saw heavens for a minute, but at least I remained standing."Doesn't seem like a dream, sir", I affirmed my theory.Chopper then slapped me across the face, owing partly to my not taking him seriously when he was so certain of the impending danger, and partly, because--at least in my opinion--he was feeling violent today."Look up, kid", he
I was confident enough that Azag wouldn't pose much of a problem after all. For one, I could see how he used evasion tactics, he was checking the waters. And that meant he felt threatened. Perhaps of the power surging within me, at least that's what I imagined. I remembered how Chopper had asked me multiple times if I smelled something. What he was really trying to discern was whether I could sense the demon. "You lot are such rude visitors", Azag appeared from our right this time. The two of us averted our attention to him."This ain't gonna get nobody nowhere, pal", Chopper observed.Naturally, Azag already knew that. Still, I was tired of this exchange as well. If Chopper knew this was an illusion, he also knew how to break through. The calm that I'd seen on him earlier meant he'd figured everything out already."I don't mean to intrude but...", I interrupted, "there really isn't a thing you can do here, Azag. You know, I did hold up against Lucifer, if only barely, but he's the k
"Please just admit that you're enjoying this."I was exhausted, there was no sign of Azag anywhere near us and Chopper was going on and on with the same thing over and over again. Still, I was able to return to my old self which I had forgotten for a while now. All this dying brought back fond memories."Seraph, if you'd just be still and do what I tell you to-"Surely, he didn't quite grasp how hard it was to do this, to kill and to die at the same time. For a long time, after god knows how many attempts, I was the sole one dying, somehow he managed to not die every single time."There should be a better mechanism to this, wouldn't you agree?"My proposal was likely to be overlooked. I "wasn't in my right mind", as he had told me earlier.Azag had pulled this illusion out of our dreams, our memories and imaginations. In other words, this illusion was the materialization of our minds. And thus to break through, we needed to make sure both our minds ceased functioning simultaneously. T
"I want to give them hope."Azag, Chopper and I stood in a vast field of golden wheat, under the shade of the sole tree bent by time. Wind blew quite freely, making waves through the field, and a rhythm which made us forget this wasn't even real. I was astonished to find such a peaceful place spun around by Azag.We weren't alone there. There was a man, with waist length dark hair and a gentle expression, wearing a long white coat. He didn't seem to take any notice of us. I later realized that this was a real memory. We were just onlookers in that world. Any action we took made no dent nor difference there."I want these people to take control. I can't help them much longer after all. I can't save them from their ultimate demise. And I certainly can't bring back the ones that die. No matter how good of a doctor I may be, I simply cannot accomplish a miracle."At first I believed he was talking to himself out loud. As it turned out the tree was very much alive. Or perhaps, possessed by
"People that haven't lost their families can never understand what sadness and loneliness feels like.""Cut the crap!" *******************I won't say that I expected any empathy from Chopper. I had never found myself agreeing with the sense of justice that the dwellers of Valhalla possessed. Chopper's actions in particular had always been questionable to me. Yet, I found the current matter no business of mine. If Chopper intended to cut Azag down, I wouldn't interfere. If it came to me, on the contrary, I wouldn't lift a finger against Azag, unless he was to become a threat to me. "Look, pal", Chopper smudged the cigarette on the ground, "Whatever grievances you got, it ain't none of my business, now are they? On the other hand, ya got something that don't belong to no one but me. So how about this? I'll let you go, if you give him back. And there ain't nothing more to this deal than that. And I swear, you wo
I would like to think to myself that this isn't the end. But seeing as her story went back to where it all started, I realized that my role wasn't saving her at all. I just made sure she'd continue to exist, eternally.In eternal suffering and forgetfulness and new encounters and the last times, in every world, she'll continue to exist.As for me, I couldn't bear to live in a world knowing she was somewhere out there, helpless and torn, just as she'd been when I first found her.When did I first find her?Who can say? I had always been talking about how I wished I'd met her sooner. In fact, I had always known her. Our existences were intertwined so much that I don't think either of us could just pull away and be happy all on our own without thinking of the other.After I'd returned Lady's power to her, I floated away in an empty space for an eternity. I was foolish enough to think that the sorrow would fade away one day. But no matter how long and far I floated away, the memory and th
It was the coldest I'd felt in ages, and there was an aching heaviness in my head that I simply couldn't seem to shake off no matter how much I walked. I don't know when, how, or why I was walking through the snow towards the top of some hill I didn't even know.For that matter, I didn't remember who I was, how I'd gotten there, or where I was going.And just like that, before I knew it, I had collapsed in a den of wolves. Luckily, it looked abandoned, so I didn't get eaten off right away. I figured it'd be a long, slow death. I found the idea of such a gentle death appealing, despite the fact that I was walking mindlessly just seconds ago.I must have passed out, for when I came to, I was stiff as a rock. And yet, I wasn't that cold anymore. I lifted my head to find myself covered in a bear pelt. Someone had been so kind as to cover me up. And yet, the pelt was rather old and shoddy. Who cared as long as it could keep me warm?I stood up, looking around, getting accustomed to my surr
"I didn't imagine we'd ever come to a crossroads such as this", I let out a puff of smoke, standing opposite her."But, as a matter of fact, I always had a feeling we would", Lady answered with her signature smirk."Sure, you did", I said sarcastically.It was surprising at first. But things made sense soon enough. Lady had sent all of us away on a mission. She'd isolated herself at Valhalla. Chopper had left of his own accord. She'd sent Sight to look for him. Deli had gone to see her children. And she bid Lubbock and June farewell. She'd even given her fur coat to June. Grim was on a mission, too. And I was looking for Jean V. to deliver her letter.It was all exactly as it had been back then. When I'd return from meeting Jean V., Lady would already be beyond saving. Back then, all I knew was that the person who sent her that blank letter was the one who came to kill her. I never ventured to find out much else.It all made sense now as I stood be
"Must you leave without fulfilling my wish, Seraph?"He had some guts to ask. I looked up at the red sky. There was nothing but barren, burnt land all around us."What else could you ask for?", I looked back at him."You look so old, Seraph", he chuckled, "What exactly did you give the others?"I looked behind me without answering his question. There was no one and nothing."What? It's a long story", I answered without looking at him."We've got time to kill", he grinned."I don't", I said, but went on to answer him anyway, "I gave everyone what they wanted.""Really?"I glared at him, "Yes, really, Grim. I took a fee, of course."He laughed."And what will you take from me?", he asked, grinning.I looked around and then rested my eyes on him."There's really nothing."He seemed to agree."So how'd you manage?""Well, Grim, you could almost call it travelling back through time. Though, it really isn't that. I split the worlds to create new ones. Time doesn't exist for me anymore. Ever
"I will take death in any way and form it comes to me, anywhere and anytime."That had to be the most brazen statement I'd heard. It took me a bit to take that statement in."You really have no special requests? If I can, I'd like to make it up to you", I sat down and stared at his bloodied face.He shook his head."Make up for what?", he asked.He didn't know me yet to call me "boy" but I suppose that's the way it had to be.I had become better at rewriting the reality. I could write quite far back in certain cases. For example, in Sight's case, I made it so he never met Lady and Chopper on the night he killed the prima donna, Czarna Dalia.Before meeting them he didn't know anything about what he'd been doing. He didn't know what an outcast was, even though he himself was an outcast. Ignorance is indeed the greatest of all blisses. And I thought for Sight, it had to be the biggest saving.Lady was right. People who see things differently are the most dangerous of all. Especially tho
"This isn't what I asked for, Seraph", she complained, fixing her glasses on her tiny nose."I don't get what the hell it is that you want exactly, June", I was beginning to get tired."You don't understand at all", she folded her arms."You're damn right, I don't. What kind of crazy a-""One thing.", she looked at me sternly, "One thing I'm asking for is a place to be happy. Not a mother, not a wife, not a hero, not any of the other things you're trying to come up with.""What'll make you happy, exactly?", I folded my arms and leaned against the wall of Valhalla.Everyone else was off to fend the red sky off. June had been left behind in a protective barrier.She fell silent."How about Lady? Isn't she your favorite?""I could care less about her", she answered, bluntly, "I hate her.""Huh?", I wasn't sure I'd her heard her right."She does everything on a whim. She claims to understand everything when rea
"They are waiting for you, Monsieur Lubbock", a dark woman poked her head into the dressing room, "It's almost time for the show."The bajillion young ladies that were powdering his nose scattered away.His face was pink with heat and he wore a long fancy coat. It almost looked odd on his somewhat small figure."I'll be right there", he answered, gussying up in the mirror."Aww, you're leaving already, Monsieur?", some of the girls came up to him.He chuckled modestly."What can I say? The life of the greatest singer in the world isn't so relaxing, my dears.""You might be the greatest singer, but Monsieur is also the life of all women's hearts", one of the cheekier ones commented.Lubbock laughed. He didn't try to hide how much he loved being pampered like this."I'm sorry, girls. My audience awaits!"Saying so, he shot out of the room and hurried towards the stage. Backstage was always heated just before his shows. He was the one star that every theater wanted to have. But he was a
"Do you blame me for mother's death, father?", she asked, placing the empty cup of tea on the little side table.Her father wasn't facing her. He was still locked up in his study, reclining on his chair and looking out of the window at some distance lands.She sat straight, with her back erect. The weight of her gown was enough to tire her but she was made up, as befitting of a noble. She had to look all the more perfect since she was visiting her home for the first time since her marriage."Blame you?", the lord of the house spoke in his grave voice after a while, "I simply don't think you were worth her death. Esme was a wise woman. A level headed, understanding, noble woman."Faye looked at her lap."You refuse to carry out the will of the house of Vlad. You'll go as far as to commit a heinous crime to that end. I'm disappointed beyond measure."Faye pursed her lips. No one but she herself had been hurt the most by what she'd done."Vlad was born to you twice. And yet, you ungratef
"Tell you what, Seraph, this one time, I met a girl and she had these enormous scars all over her arms and legs. I couldn't help noticing her, of course. When she told me she did it herself, I couldn't help it. I killed her then and there", he chuckled to himself, "I didn't want to do it, of course. Something just came over me. It wasn't that she told me she did it herself. It was how she said it. She was smiling.""I'm sure she wasn't smiling because she was happy", I answered, with a solemn look on my face."I'm sure of that too. I was sure of it back then too. That's probably why I killed her. But do you know how many people I've saved?"He looked at my face. I stayed silent."I've saved more people than I've killed. I've been counting since the beginning. I know, for sure, that my atonement is over. At least, it ought to be. But does it look like I'm still repenting?", he asked, smiling vaguely, knowing my answer."You do.""That's because I am. No matter how many I save...the ato