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2024-08-11 00:12:58Sarah’s soothing voice over the telephone was what Phoebe needed. The words Marlin had said to her somehow left her completely heart broken, but Sarah’s support gave her the light at the end of the tunnel.
“Phoebe, I told you before, do not let that bastard, Marlin get close to you because he only wants to see you in pain all because he couldn’t have you to himself”Sarah was right and Phoebe needed to take that into mind and quit thinking so much about herself and what she wanted. “I know you are right Sarah, it’s just that his words really dagger my feelings and I just feel like I am in a loosing battle.”Sarah spoke comforting words to her ‘You are not alone in this, fighting Phoebe’. “I agree with you, let me tell you I am standing with you the entire process, we will find the solution.”Phoebe forced a smile which easily went to Sarah’s observation despite the fact that it was very weak. “Thank you Sarah, Your sentiments are a source of comf
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SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD THE NEW NEIGHBOR
Her thoughts went to Seth and mixed emotions still linger with her. She recognised that their base is far from being a picture perfect couple, but she knew there is something deep inside her that still has feelings for him. The question that rose was, “can two people who are in love with each other look for ways to get back together after so many hurtful moments or are they are to remain separated forever?”With that, Phoebe shook her head waving the thoughts away to the back of her mind where she forced it to remain. Tonight was not the time for such seriously thoughtful thinking. The situation required her to take a closer look at herself and start on her own healing process.Going home, Phoebe felt something off her chest and she was utterly free. That evening she went to bed and for the first time in a while she slept and woke up very much at peace. With everything that Sarah has done for her plus her mindset, she felt somehow at peace.
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD THE NEW NEIGHBORS II
They got back to work and interestingly for the first time in a long while Phoebe felt relieved and happier. The encounter with Jason was quite positive and meeting him was refreshing so she was glad about her day.When they had finalized moving the last of the boxes, Jason moved closer to Phoebe and smiled at her. “Wow, you really saved my ass today, I start my new job in one month’s time and this is making it much easier and much more enjoyable.”"Anytime, Jason," Phoebe replied. Nicely said, men It was my pleasure .Any other help you may need feel free to ask.“I’ll definitely keep that in mind.” Jason smirked. “And maybe the next time we can try organizing something which will be slightly more entertaining than the process of moving the boxes.”‘Sure thing,’ said Phoebe, agreeing to the plan. “Hello there Jason,” “I am happy to see you, welcome to the neighborhood,” and “It was lovely meeting you, welcome to the hood.”“Oh, You are we
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD THE INVITE
“I’m glad you think so, then let us prepare for it. So, the first step could be something like a gallery or a community center.” “That sounds perfect. I feel more reassured by it already.” ‘And maybe that will make someone else who doesn’t think they have any artistic skills, realize that they do, and start painting trees too.’ Phoebe replied. "Oh, without a doubt! Art also has the facility to create closure and make people see life from a different angle. I am quite looking forward to this, Phoebe.” “Oh me too Jason It’s good to have the prospect of something to look forward to and another thing is that it is always better to go through it with a friend.” ‘By the way, have you got any near trips in the pipeline? I know that traveling to new places makes me feel like I discover new muse’Jadon asked her expectingly. “No at the moment, but I have been entertaining the idea of going for a mountain trip since la
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD NOT JUST A COFFEE DATE
“Yes, my dear, we see each other at 4 in the afternoon.” Phoebe texted back.When she was putting on her sandals, she contemplated what this meeting would be like. This was coffee; however, it seems the meeting was more than just a cup of coffee.She grabbed her purse and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before opening the door and stepping out.Phoebe, being punctual, got to the café a few minutes before the time agreed for and got a table for two near the window. The light entering the room through the windows made her feel comfortable, and she relaxed. A few minutes later Christian entered the room, and seeing her, he greeted her enthusiastically with a wink.“Hi Phoebe,” he said briefly and sat opposite her. "You look great."“Thanks Christian. You also look good.” She said as the tension left her.They took their time placing their drinks and then moved into small casual talk. Christian described the case that has been recently s
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD A NIGHT WITH YOU
They both went on with the conversation until midnight, discussing more of the things they wanted for themselves and for each other, and even their fears. Finally, just before the chiming of the clock twelve, Christian saw Phoebe trying to hide her yawn. “Tired are you; might as well spend the night here, I have an extra bedroom and you can… sleep in there,” he said. Phoebe looked at her for a moment and then slowly nodded. “I do, Christian and thanks for the compliment.” Christian introduced her to the guest room and ensured she had all that she wanted or needed. “If there is anything you require please feel free to knock on my door, I am just a door away.” Phoebe got comfortable in the guest room, was glad to be in Christian’s apartment which was warm and comfortable. The lovely outfit he had bought her was comfortable sleepwear that she slipped into; she got on the bed but sleep never came. Day’s activities and almost bl
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD BITTER TRUTH
The next morning Phoebe woke up with a feeling that she had not experienced in a long time, the feeling of contentment. She woke up yawning she saw Christian sitting up already, brewing coffee in the tiny kitchenette. She smiled enjoying the calmness of simply being just two people cooking in the kitchen. As they prepared to sit down for their meal the sound of compelling knock could be heard at the door. All of a sudden Phoebe felt a swift beasting flutter in her bosom as Christian moved to answer it. Unfortunately, she could not rid herself of the negative feelings that seized her. This had not crossed her mind till one morning she woke up to this message: “Who could it be this early?” Christian swiftly opened the door on the other side stood Marlin, looking very pleased with himself. Phoebe's blood ran cold. She had not been able to set her eyes on him since the time they exchanged some harsh words over the telephone. “C
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD BITTER TRUTH II
He looked at her and held her hands in his, grasping them without too much pressure, but without being weak either. Phoebe you scared me for a while there, I’m not he man that Marlin wants you to see, But I’ve grown through you and I’ve changed. Perhaps Phoebe’s heart was made of agony compounded by confusion, for she did not know what to do anymore. She tries to let the man as close as possible to be intimate with her but the thought still lingered on her mind. “I think I have no idea, Christian,” she said, shaking her head friously. “There is so much to comprehend. ” Christian agreed, looking seriously at me. “You have all the time you need Phoebe, I will just wait for you, hoping you could forget everything I have done that led to our break up and give me another try.” Marlin stopped and Phoebe, taking her hands back softly, stood up to move near the window. She looked at the peacefulness around her and wondered, the calm of the morning broken by
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD CONFUSED PHOEBE
Christian followed her with his eyes, his throat tightened, thinking of the woman he has been in love with all this time. He understood that he had to wait for her to come around, to slowly open up to him and this means giving her time. But the moments when we are cornered seemed to stretch until it felt like an eternity. Suddenly,Phoebe shifted around to look at him squarely in the face, her determination reflected on her face. “Christian, I just want to be by myself for some time, there is a lot happening around me and I feel I need to figure some things out.I don’t want to hurt you but I need this right now, please. ” Christian nodded, swallowing hard. He looked at her and said softly, “Of course Phoebe, I will be here awaiting your feedback, but trust me I really and truly love you from the bottom of my heart.you take as much time as you wish. ” With that Phoebe left the room and her thoughts as jumbled as a bowl of
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"What Regret"
“Regret,” she said with a sneer. Regret is just a euphemism for guilt. It doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t wipe the slate clean, and it definitely does not heal the mess that you made.‘Christian,’ she said softly, ‘don’t come any closer.’ He stopped, as she decided to step back from him.Phoebe flared up again and asked him: “You said you came for the truth?” “Fine. Here’s the truth, Christian. I loved you. With everything I had. And you destroyed me. You were able to make me question myself in ways that I never knew existed. And now you stand here, asking me for what? Closure? Redemption? Forgiveness?”“No,” he said firmly. All I am demanding is an opportunity to prove that I can improve.” That I am better.”She scoffed. “And you believe that one conversation is going to make a difference?” You think I can just what? Stare at you and forget the years I struggled to climb up the ladder and get a life again?“No,” he repeated again, and there was no quiver in his voice. “But I can’t
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Need You
Christian did not answer this for a while. He looked down, his hands were tightly bunched into fists at his sides. “I know it caused pain,” he said, his voice rising in a hoarse whisper. “I know I can’t undo that. But I can’t just let things be this way. Not anymore. If that means living with your hatred then let it be so.Phoebe only chuckled bitterly and began to pace in front of the fire. ‘Christian, you keep saying all the right things.’ Saying sorry, admitting my mistake, promising to take my anger on myself. But you don’t seem to understand. It’s not about you. Not anymore.”He stared at her with a frown on his face. “Then what is it about?”“It’s about me,” she said angrily, turning to him. ‘That’s about the years I’ve spent struggling to climb out of the pit you dug for me to fall into.’ It is about finding out how to be independent, how to live without the feeling that my chest is going to collapse. It’s about healing, or at least, about trying to put myself back together aft
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Believe inYou
Phoebe shook her head, her arms wrapped around herself. “You don’t get it, Christian. Other people also had the same feeling as you; they were scared. I was terrified too. Of losing you, of not being good enough. But I stayed. I fought. And you didn’t.”“I know,” he said and his eyes welled up with tears. “And I hate myself for that. I wish I could have been stronger and did not leave when I did. But I’m here now, Phoebe. And I’m not running this time.”She glared at him and her eyes were red with rage, hurt and something else which she could not describe. “You say that now,” she whispered. But what happens when things get hard again? This begs the question, what happens when the cracks start to show?“They won’t,” he said firmly. “Because I’ve come to realize that running in particular does not solve anything. It just leaves a trail of broken pieces behind.”Phoebe only shook her head and a tear rolled down her face. She gently removed it as if she was embarrassed to show her weaknes
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“I’m confused”
It’s convenient. You were waiting until you felt I was ready and powerful enough to take the news. Until you thought I didn’t need you anymore.”“That is not true,” Christian said quickly, getting up, his voice a high pitched note. “I have been taking this guilt with me every day since I left.” I did not return because of convenience. I returned because I could not continue living such a life knowing that I destroyed something that was wonderful.Phoebe whirled on her toes, glaring. “And what about me? Have you ever thought what it feels like to wake up every day with the marks you have made on others? To have to break yourself down and begin to build yourself up again from scratch just to have the one who was responsible for tearing you down appear with an apology?”“I do now,” he said quietly. “Because I do, I see it in your eyes. I hear it in your voice. And I hate myself for being the reason it’s there.”She was breathing raggedly, her hands were balled up at her sides. “You don’t
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Either you believe or not
Christian sighed deeply and rested his hands on the table. “I am a man who wants to know how to accept what I have done. To challenge it, rather than avoiding it. To be able to admit that I can change the future but I can’t change the present and I can’t change the past.”Phoebe scoffed. ‘You really believe that taking responsibility is sufficient?’ You really believe that saying you were wrong in any of this makes it alright?”“No,” Christian said quickly. “It doesn’t make it okay. Nothing can make it okay. But it’s a start, isn’t it? A step toward being better. Towards becoming a person who does not destroy things.”Phoebe looked at her sister with her face impassive and then shook her head. “You want to be better? Good for you. But you don’t get to use me as your redemption arc. I am not some check-point on your way to self-improvement.”“I’m not asking you to be,” Christian said, his voice quiet, but commanding. I don’t need your forgiveness or your approval for anything I am doin
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Lingering pain
“Phoebe,” he started cautiously, “I’m not here to put more load on you regarding this.” I know you didn’t want any of this and I’m not going to say that I’m so great for coming here now. But I’ve been attempting to take responsibility for my actions. And part of that means realizing how much I caused you pain.”Phoebe’s lips formed, her arms drawn tightly around her in the manner of a shield. “It does not heal the wound, Christian.” Oh do you think that knowing you regret it will give me back the time I lost? The trust I lost? The parts of me that had to be reconstructed?”“No,” replied Christian, who now looked ashamed. “I don’t. And I’m not asking you to forget what I did or even forgive me. I just had to tell you that… I can see it now. I can now understand how self-centered I was and how unable to notice your suffering.She tilted her head to the side, her mouth tightening as she looked out the window and saw the rain running down the glass. “Blind, huh?” she said with much bitter
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
All about Phoebe
Phoebe went back to the fire, her hands folding over her chest. For what seemed like a long time she did not respond. The fire crackled in the background, and its heat was the only thing that made the atmosphere between them warm.“What do you want from me, Christian?” she asked after a long time her voice was so low that it was barely audible.“Nothing,” he said quickly. “I don’t want anything from you. I just… I had to share it with you because it is the truth. To say sorry and let you understand that I noticed your suffering. That I see you.”Phoebe only managed to stifle a sarcastic laugh. “You see me now? That’s rich. Where was this clarity two years ago?”Christian moved a little closer and spoke slowly and calmly as if he was pleading with her. I was blind back then Phoebe.” As if the rest of the world does not exist, or, at least, I don’t exist to the rest of the world. But now… now I see everything I should have seen before. I understand how powerful you are, how much you inv
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Get rewarded
“Sorry isn’t enough,” said Phoebe, tears rolling down her cheeks. “They think they can just come out and apologize and that’s the end of it.”“I’m not expecting that,” Christian said quickly. I know that I can never reverse the wrong I have done. But I had to tell you. I had to stop bringing this with me without doing something about it.”Phoebe exhaled hard and then rested her weight against the windowsill. “Well, did you even know what you left behind?” “How much I had to tidy up after you?”“I’ve thought about it,” Christian said, softly. “But I know that thinking about it isn’t the same as living it. I still can’t fathom how difficult it must have been for you.”Phoebe looked at her and shook her head, fuming again. “And you didn’t just hurt me, Christian.” You made me doubt, everything, including us, including myself. I used so much time thinking why am I not enough. Why I couldn’t repair whatever was ailing you.”Christian cringed as if the words that came out of her mouth had h
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Another Game
One part of him wanted to kick Christian out, shut the door and never see him again. But there was another part, a lesser, more contemplative part of him that was interesting. What if Christian really had transformed? What if this wasn’t just another one of his games?“Alright,” Phoebe said in the end, the word coming out sounding more like a bitter grumble. “You want to talk? Talk. ‘I’m not making any guarantees here,’ I tell him.Christian nodded and his shoulders dropped down as well. He looked around the room, and then looked at the couch. “Do you mind if we sit?”Phoebe frowned, then reluctantly gestured at the couch with a nod. He stayed on his feet, leaning with his arms folded against the wall, a defensive air about him.Christian leaned back on the couch, placing his elbows on his knees and his hands on top of each other. He looked at the floor for a moment with a blank face, then he said something.“I know I hurt you. And not just once—repeatedly. You wanted to help me and I
