The Door

Chapter 2

You see, the rational, tidily ordered, scientific mind can accept and categorize a great deal. Perhaps even be flexible and play along a bit when things don't quite square up with one's hypothesis. But, when the universe goes about distributing strange doors willy-nilly and playing fast and loose with the laws of science, one's mind must simply say, "No thank you!" Refuse to participate, as it were. Or, as some might put it, faint dead away.

Luckily, I had fallen onto the bed and when I came to again, that is precisely where I found myself. No worse for wear, though my mind, which had experienced the shock of its life, begged to differ. Despite that, I wiped the drool from my cheek and lifted my head for another look.

Oh dear, there it was again, outlined by the doorframe, a view of a clear blue sky above a green, rolling hillside. That had been it. The final bit that my mind couldn't wrestle with, because as every good Englishman knows, clear blue skies simply don't exist. They're a figment of the imagination, like fairies, honest politicians, or the notion that good tea can be had outside of England. Preposterous!

The sunlight caressing those rolling hills sang to me like a siren, tempting me to step through that odd door. But I wasn't going to fall for it. No, I would carefully examine the situation and think through all of the possible eventualities most thoroughly.

Yes, this was a time for a careful exercise of the scientific method. With that firmly in mind, I rose again from the bed, tied my dressing gown closed, and shuffled back into my slippers to begin my careful examination.

Any thought of setting even a foot through that door was the furthest thing from my mind. It would be preposterously foolish, especially without bracing the door open and lots of careful packing and preparation.

Yes, if I was anything, I was careful. Careful to a fault some said, but let them talk. I was a bloke with his wits about him, and not one to be trifled with! Hah!

The doorway stood perhaps a meter in front of me, but I could see through it that the grassy slopes made their way gently downwards. Where the sky neared the turf, it turned from a beautiful, deep blue to a swath of turquoise. Which seemed an odd thing for a sky to do, unless...

I suddenly sprinted through the door and out into the sweet, sweet sunshine. Oh, it felt wonderfully warm on my face, and the grass was so soft and verdant beneath my slippers. Butterflies flitted jauntily by, and was that the sound of waves caressing a shoreline somewhere downhill?

Now, you may judge, but it had been a frightfully long and cold rainy spell, even for England.

After shuffling a few meters further on, I crested a small rise. Down below, I could make out what looked to be a long stretch of white sand beach, kissed by that turquoise blue. Yes, that was the sound of waves!

Well, Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore, I thought with a chuckle. Or, perhaps we were, as I'd never been to Kansas, but I seemed to recall that it didn't have beachfront property, or hills for that matter.

In any case, this certainly wasn't England. That much I knew. The burning orb in the sky and the complete lack of clouds was a dead giveaway.

It was then that the warm breeze picked up a bit, and I could smell just a hint of the sea. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply of the clean sea air. I reveled in it. I grinned like a simpleton and then giggled like a schoolgirl. Ahh, the simple pleasure of it was almost overpowering.

This perfect moment was then very rudely interrupted by a prolonged, and frankly annoying, creaking sound from somewhere behind me, which was then followed by a loud thump.