The Vagary of a Bastard

Chapter 2

Ten years had passed before his very own eyes. Now given a new name for his existence, Haruka had many questions in his mind. No amount of evidence nor findings were able to answer his unbearable questions. No claims were able to support his theory, but here he was. All flesh and bones, standing right in front of his reflection. Haruka squinted right at his own reflection. Golden blonde locks cascaded from his head down to the nape of his neck. Giant round violet orbs staring right back at him. He almost mistook his reflection to be sick due to the pale complexion

Haruka snorted. It's been five years already; he still couldn't get used to his new appearance. Growing up a devout atheist, he did not believe anything that his parents and community believed in. Faith? Resurrection? Reincarnation?

Laughable. The often-debatable theological belief caused Haruka to bark out laughter every Sunday. He went to church with his parents to hear sermons. He's a man of science, for crying out loud! He slept with facts and evidence under his pillows. He owned a library of encyclopedias in his house!

So why does this not make sense to him?

He remembered something that both Hindu and Buddhists believed in. Rebirth. A weird concept that his past self had encountered, indeed. But now, he had to bear with this situation due to a lack of resources.

The knocking sound disturbed Haruka's trail of thoughts. Haruka wrote down his theory before calling them in.

"Come in." With permission, they came in. Three female adult attendants and a young boy, no older than thirteen, bowed before Haruka. The female attendants all wore a translucent fabric that covered their faces from sight. They wore thick and layered clothing that drag against the floor. The boy, however, wore the much thinner and lighter dress. He also carried some gold accessories on his arm and neck.

"What's the occasion, Futaba?" Haruka asked the boy. Futaba gave a small smile at Haruka.

"Satomaru-sama asked for your presence along with your siblings'," Futaba replied meekly. He stepped back as the attendants put multiple wooden boxes with an intricate design in front of Haruka. "Todomaru-sama wanted Haruka-sama to get dressed." One of the attendants spoke up monotonously. "We had provided you appropriate clothing of his choice."

Haruka said nothing as he let the attendants do their things. He watched Futaba closed the door silently to give him privacy. Haruka had always been shunned by his clan. Whenever he came out, clansmen would glare behind his back. He didn't know much about his situation. He couldn't understand. One day, he was locked inside the room by his grandfather, who had loathed him ever since his birth. After a day without food and water, he was found by his father. Weakened by starvation and dehydration, Haruka was immediately hospitalized. There was a considerable huge commotion right outside of his room. He couldn't hear a word. Days went by, Haruka was discharged. Ever since then, he never saw his grandfather walked into right-wing like he used to just to throw a stink eye at his own grandchild. His father, however, tried to spend as much time as he can with Haruka.

Haruka concluded that he was a black sheep among the white sheep. He knew he was different; he didn't need the awful look from the others just to know it. What's the point of trying to immerse himself among the white sheep?

Haruka grunted when the attendant tugged his hair. The attendant slowly put in the hairpieces while she styled his hair. The other two attendants had finished their work; they were packing up the things and tidying the place while they were at it. After a few minutes, she was done. Haruka looked at himself in the mirror and frowned at his new appearance. He wore an elegant white kimono that was made with spider silks. There were beautiful shimmery threads that are made from pure gold. His hair was held by the flower kanzashi. Haruka hated how he looked. He looked like a woman, especially with his hair worn that way. His grandfather tried to do everything just to effeminate him.

Futaba jumped in surprise when Haruka suddenly slammed open the shoji door. Futaba immediately escorted Haruka to the courtroom. The walk was silent, too silent for Futaba's liking. He tried to strike up a conversation with Haruka, but he was shut down as quickly as a wink. Dejected, Futaba stopped in front of the big red gate. He held the door open before closing it softly behind Haruka's back.

Haruka hid his scowl behind the sleeve of his kimono. Just great, that old fuck was there. The whole council was there in their designated area except for his grandfather. How he despised the old geezer

-o-

Todomaru stood beside his son's throne. He was pulling discreetly at the courtesan's kimono sash. The courtesan tried to move away from him, but she was ultimately held back by the dark gaze of the elder. She whimpered softly.

"Father, stop it." With a simple order, Todomaru let go of the courtesan's kimono sash. The courtesan quickly backed away from him to reunite with the rest of the courtesans. Todomaru sucked his teeth in annoyance.

"And let the opportunity slip out of my hand. You've gone senile, Satomaru." Todomaru retorted, taking his paper folding fan to cool himself. Satomaru could only heave a deep breath to release the tension.

"The only ones who've gone senile are you," Satomaru muttered under his breath. Narrowing his eyes at the group of courtesans, Satomaru rubbed his finger on his temple. "The courtesans are unnecessary for this meeting. Remove them at once."

Todomaru furrowed his brows, nonsense! These beautiful and youthful ladies are essential to our needs!"

"Your unholy satisfaction is not recommended for this meeting. The courtesans are not for your entertainment nor reproductive needs." Satomaru stated firmly, ordering the guards to guide the courtesans out of the courtroom. Todomaru was fuming red from rage and embarrassment

Satomaru paid no mind to him; instead, he searched for his blonde-headed son in the crowd. His other sons were there, dressed nicely in their yukatas. Their mother was also there with them. However, still no sign of his youngest son.

The gate was suddenly opened, and then a young child dressed in white kimono walked in gracefully. The kanzashi illuminated under the dozen artificial light.

'Nadeshiko...?' Satomaru thought absentmindedly, but as soon as the young child walked closer, his thought vanished. And replaced with a clear sounding of disapproval. That child was not a woman. That's his youngest son, Haruka.

"Haruka, what are you wearing?" Satomaru questioned him, watching his face getting distorted with irritation. "Father, the attendants had brought me this dress. They said it was from Todomaru-sama." Of course, it had to be that old man. Nothing came out good from him. Todomaru stood there with a smug expression on his face.

"Ah, my bad." He uttered proudly.

Satomaru bit his inner cheek to prevent himself from growling. He will never forget that fateful night. Satomaru searched the whole compound for Haruka. When he finally found his youngest son, he immediately picked his son up. Haruka was lying limp on his arm, so thin and pale. His blue lips were quivering from the freezing room. No amount of heat was able to warm the cold and pitiful Haruka. Satomaru shook his head to clear that memory from his mind. He cleared his throat.

"Go be with your brothers."

Haruka bowed. He went to his half-brothers. However, Satomaru saw a slight shift in Haruka's eyes. His son glared at the person behind him.

A soft chuckle escaped from his mouth.

-o-

The sun was starting to set. The meeting just ended. Haruka did not expect that the meeting was very long. Much to his dismay, nothing of importance that Haruka had gathered from it. The whole meeting was a waste, with his grandfather constantly urging Satomaru to give the right to succession to his other legitimate sons. The elders agreed to what the old geezer, his father, had difficulty settling the meeting. Haruka sat on the porch watching the koi fish bumping at each other in the fish pond. Haruka felt the shadow loomed over him.

"I don't understand why Father paid so much attention to you." A young boy stood behind Haruka. His dark spiky hair brushed against his back when he walked toward Haruka. His red yukata flopped when he sat next to Haruka. But his face remained scrunched up. "What is it?"

Haruka looked at the boy from the corner of his eyes and hummed, "Perhaps, you have more than I do. The two fundamental beings were present at your birth. And the love and admiration from the clansmen were genuine..." He turned to face the boy directly "...While mine departed before I got a chance to see her. And the whole clan raged over my existence. He's all I have." Haruka replied with a ghost smile on his face.

"Born under the crisp breeze of spring, Futanage Kazemaru; the child who had more than plenty." The orange ray hit Haruka's face creating a soft glow. His hair turned into golden threads. The wind picked up and blew away the light-weighted kanzashi causing his hair to dance along with the wind. But one thing that will forever burn into Kazemaru's memory was Haruka's melancholic smile etched on his face.

"BORN UNWANTED AT THE DISTANT SPRING FIELD, FUTANAGE HARUKA. THE CHILD WHO HAD NOTHING LEFT."