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31

... On the day of my sixteenth birthday, my father brought me to the Ra-Ell estate, as I later guessed, “to the bride”, but then I was overwhelmed with pride and joy, leaving no room for third-party and thoughtful reflections. Pride because there was no person in Antrey more respected than the one who accompanied me. And the joy ... We saw each other too rarely: the service took my father's time, my time was training. Not that it was so hard to learn something new every day, and yet, knowing how few days we spent together, it was bitter to waste them on useful activities, but at the time of youth, seeming superfluous and worthless.

The first time I was surprised was when my father led me along the path deep into the park, and not along the main alley to the front porch. The second time, when I saw behind the dense openwork of the bushes where we stopped, a lawn, and in the middle of it a fountain and five girls dressed in dresses of the same cut. Perhaps it was this similarity that caused the main bewilderment: why my mother did not attach much importance to the uniqueness of her outfit, but she, noticing at least one similar cut line in someone, snorted angrily, remembering the tailor with an unkind word. And then it’s necessary ... Yes, and the dresses are not very suitable: a white canvas without shine, a high bodice ending right under the chest. Uh... Under the place where the breasts will grow later: all the girls were no older than fourteen years old and had not yet had time to acquire magnificent forms.

I looked at the flock of white birds chirping nonchalantly by the fountain, and turned my gaze to my father.

Why did we come here?

The father smiled, leaving his eyes completely serious.

Trust me, I had a reason. And so do you.

- You won't tell?

- A little bit later. First I want to ask: take a close look at these girls.

- AND?

- Try to evaluate them and determine your attitude towards them.

- Why?

“That's right, Ray. Consider this another lesson. Or an exam, it's up to you.

Yes-ah-ah-ah-ah, I found something to offer! Who loves to learn, and then also prove that he has mastered all the necessary knowledge? I hate. But when my father asks... I do my best. Because I don’t care how others treat me, but I can’t disappoint my parents.

I moved a particularly annoying branch away from my face, which strove to tickle my nose with leaves until a fit of sneezing, and proceeded to fulfill my father's assignment.

At the second examination, the girls still turned out to be different. Except for two who were clearly twins - curly, swarthy and swarthy. By the way, white dresses suited them. The other three, not too much, because they were rather pale and fair-haired.

Plump, with tightly braided and laid around the head braids.

Lanky, impetuous, ash-haired.

And another, a skinny girl with red-gold curls, her hands folded in her lap in resignation, while her friends merrily splashed each other with water from the fountain bowl.

How can I treat them? Yes, this is the first time I've seen them! I look at my father, but he thoughtfully chews a freshly picked blade of grass and is not going to simplify my task.

Okay, I'll break through myself.

The one that is thicker than the others laughs all the time, and even at the same time squeals disgustingly. We strike out.

The twins look at each other a little too conspiratorially. Set themselves apart from others? We strike out.

The lanky one will grow into a real heavy infantryman if she already moves like a guy now. But, most likely, she will never shine with her mind, because at the obvious joke of one of the twins she laughed later than the others, and she did it, it seems, just to keep up with the company. We strike out.

What can be said about the latter? Nerd. He does not want to join the general fun and does not let anyone into his thoughts. Canny. Is it bad or good? Depending on the purposes for which... Cross out.

Inspection done.

I exhaled contentedly, and the father asked again:

— What can you say?

“First, clarify in which direction my conclusions should move.

- And just like that? Did you like any of them?

I flutter my eyelashes in confusion.

- That is?

“Just as a person, outwardly, in behavior… Would you like to meet any of them?”

I took another look at the girls.

- Honestly?

The father smiled.

- Honestly.

- None.

He forced his laughter into a soft snort.

- That's what I thought...

— Did I say something wrong?

- That, all that ... Well, I'll put the question differently: what do you think about these young daneke? What will they be like when they grow up?

- What? If in order, then ... The twins are mischievous and, if they do not cope with themselves, will become a problem for the family. The fat woman takes everything too hotly, but hotness can be ostentatious, then this girl should beware. Dylda is dumb and can easily fall under someone's influence either to the detriment or to the benefit of himself. The skinny one does not live here and not now: a quiet pool in which several demons may well start. It seems to be everything.

My father nodded in time with my words, and at the end of the report on the work done, he drove all emotions from his face, leaving only intense attention:

Now I'm going to ask you the most important question. Before you answer it, Ray, think not just well, but as well as you have ever thought before. Which of these daneke will you take as your wife?

I gasped in surprise.

- Wives? Are you kidding?

He was not joking, and it was perfectly clear even to such a youngster as me.

“Father, is it really necessary to decide like this, without hesitation and…”

- Exactly. On first impression. Long thinking is not right, Ray, you can trust me.

I crumpled the slippery green leaf in my fingers.

“And I… have to answer today?”

- Now.

It would have been easier for me to send anyone home with such a question, but not my own father, who - I not only saw it, I almost felt it with every inch of my body - suffered, asking and waiting for an answer. Because the answer must be received as it should be. Regardless of desires. Both mine and my father's.

- May I think about it?

- But not to long.

Not for long ... And eternity is not enough to decide your fate once and for all without the right to correct what has been drawn. Well, you'll have to make a choice. Just don't make a mistake...

I won’t even consider twins, although they are the prettiest of all for faces: why do I need a wife who will play me, changing places with her sister? Suppose I can somehow distinguish one from the other, but my mental balance will be irreparably lost.

The fat woman, if she doesn’t grow up, will become the most perfect barrel, and besides, insincere, and every day to fight with the “home” enemy is not the limit of my dreams.

A thin girl with her gaze inward, not outward, and even with such a stern face ... Br! Already goosebumps.

No, out of the whole company, the most acceptable choice is the tall one. True, there is a danger here too: if you don’t manage to “sharpen” her for yourself, I risk getting a wife with a heavy hand. Hmm, who do you choose?

Too bad they are so far away from me and I can't read anything. Maybe it will still work? No, a waste of time and effort: even the wind does not blow in my direction. All circumstances against...

You have to decide on something. More precisely, on someone, otherwise my father will not let me go home alive. The last time, the very, very last. Which blonde? Fat? Skinny? High?

I don't need an enemy. I don't need a slave. I don't need a lady. But if I have to make a choice... The enemy must be destroyed, that's how I was taught. A slave can never become a friend. The master is not capable of condescending to a servant. But of the three evils - to fight, command and obey - I can only agree on one ...

- I chose.

The father exhaled, not even trying to hide his joy.

— Who is it?

- The one that sits away from everyone.

He looked at my “choice”, thought about something and nodded:

“No better or worse than others. Received.

And then the father walked around the bushes, went out onto the path, and turned to the girls:

— Lovely daneke! You are invited to the house for dinner. May I accompany you?

They allowed. But she, with hair shimmering with red gold, was in no hurry to go along with everyone: the girl must have also wanted to splash in the bowl of the fountain, but she did not dare to do it in front of everyone, and now that the noisy company was out of sight, there are no more obstacles. was, and narrow palms scooped up water. But I did not look at her hands, but at her face, which subtly and very quickly changed its expression.

Severity disappeared somewhere, the features became completely childish, which they should have been, and a radiance appeared in her bright eyes, dreamy, a little shy and surprisingly defenseless. Maybe that's when I fell in love, I don't know. But I didn’t dare to approach and introduce myself: our first personal meeting took place at a dinner party, and Nais’s face was again frozen and strict, but now the coldness could no longer frighten or puzzle me, because naive tenderness was hidden behind it ...

- What are you muttering there?

- BUT?

“What are you mumbling about, I ask?”

— Eh?

Viger looked into my eyes with sympathy.

- And yet you are not quite healthy, staring at one point and do not want to talk to a friend. Something happened?

- It's like looking.

“Ra-Dien ordered to ensure your safety, but kept silent about everything else. Maybe at least you won't make me wander in the dark? Eh, Ray?

I squeezed out through my teeth:

“Ballig is dead.

We must give Wiger his due: he did not try to express sympathy or indignation, but accepted the sad news silently and calmly, only the fold of his lips became even stricter.

- Clear.

- What do you understand?

“Why did the Councilor insist on keeping an eye on you. If you are left without a "shell" ...

“And without the right claw.”

How about Kirian?

- I kicked her out.

- Because of which?

- Because of stupidity. Her own and someone else's.

Do you mean yourself?

Does he bully a sick person who is in a difficult situation? Friend, it's called! A good reason to boil up and arrange a slight tantrum, which would undoubtedly entertain a brilliant society, bored in anticipation of the queen, and yet ... I'd better save my strength for other pranks.

Kiri is pregnant.

I guess from...

— Yes modicum from whom! Do you understand what that means?

Viger spent a few seconds contemplating the latest news and its consequences, after which the tanned face of the Re-Amiter paled noticeably.

- "Let go" according to all the rules?

- Yes.

Ra-Ken thought a little more and sank into a chair. I took the next one, once again cursing court tastes that turn all seats into either hard boards or heaps of pillows that can cause just as much inconvenience, and in other cases much more.

“So now you have…

- Two "snakes" hang.

- How long can you hold them?

- A week, no more. Then they will go into hibernation and wake up no earlier than the next full moon.

“Wonderful,” Viger concluded, and the tone of his voice, in contrast to the meaning of what was said, was funeral. And there was no doubt about who to appoint to the role of the deceased.

I thoroughly kissed the glass, since two extra eaters sucked all the fresh goodies out of my blood and did not threaten to get tipsy. Actually, now strong drinks served to satisfy the appetite of voracious "snakes" and the only way to keep them from falling into a sleepy state.

Ra-Ken never got to know all the details of my service (because he adhered to the generally accepted opinion about the existing connection between abundant knowledge and sound sleep), but the seriousness of such an event as a sharp reduction in the number of bodyguards did not require explanation. Even though my life is rarely in real danger (to be honest, until recently it was not threatened at all), the weakening of the guard could not but cause alarm, especially for a person who perfectly imagines the full depth of the possible development of events.

While the re-amitter was frantically trying to think of ways out of the labyrinth that had arisen, I, this time on my own, and not with the help of a friend, called the servant and demanded for my sole use the whole bottle, which settled at the leg of the chair immediately after sharing contents with a glass. And, since healers always advise to combine the treatment of the body with the treatment of the spirit by pleasing the eyes and ears with pleasant things, my attention again turned to the wife and the gentleman courting her.

Either my eyes are slightly clouded, or Nais is no longer so impregnable ... It seems that her head is slightly tilted towards the handsome man. That's right, tilted. And, judging by the slightly relaxed features of her face, my little wife listens to the words of her boyfriend with interest. Well, you must! What can he tell her that I can't? It would be necessary to intervene in this idyll. I'll take it right now...

“Her Majesty asks to be excused, urgent state affairs are forcing to delay the start of the Small Reception,” sternly, as if those present were to blame for this, informed the Ruler of Royal Receptions, an old woman, whose age could not be determined, but her vigor aroused envy, erected in the center of the hall with a mouse-gray statue everyone without exception. - But in order not to cause inconvenience to the guests, Her Majesty offers to brighten up the expectation with music. If dan Millit does not refuse to take on the task of extracting sounds from an appropriate instrument.

— Oh, of course. The court musician hastened to stand up and bow. - I'll be honored!

The manager gave him an appraising look, as if she had seen him for the first time in her life, pursed her lower lip and majestically floated out of the hall. As soon as the train of the dress disappeared behind the threshold, all the daneke, who had the good fortune to be invited to the reception, chirped:

— Please! Please!

Dan Millit, slightly flushed with the unexpected pleasure of being the centerpiece of the evening (at least until the Queen appeared), picked up the lute and moved closer to the western part of the hall, so that nothing would interfere with the sound of music and voice.

The favorite of the ladies, who won the reserved respect of their husbands, the court musician carefully and successfully kept on the verge between harmless adoration and passion that could bring trouble, and still remained lonely. I did not seek a close acquaintance with Millit, but I heard that his seclusion was the result of a disappointment in love that happened to him in early youth and caused the awakening of a dormant gift until then to compose poetry and shift them to soul-touching melodies. Maybe there are more fictions in this story than in ancient legends, I won’t argue. Everything happens in this world. Even things that can't be.

Long fingers sank down on the sensitively frozen strings, and under the arches of the Coral Hall, a weightless, unpretentious, but attractive melody flew up. When Millit wove his singing into the play of the lute, the women held their breath, and the men, with some displeasure (more ostentatious than sincere), followed their example.

Indulge in love. Ridiculous. Handsomely.

At the dawn of spring, in a round dance of snowstorms

Or in the gray mist of an autumn drop?

We can't remember when. And forgetting is impossible. [16]

Good choice to say the least. I turned to Viger, but the stern rebuke had to be postponed, because the re-amiter was still deep in thought. Okay, then you get everything you deserve! If you were allowed to get acquainted with the innermost thoughts, this is not a reason to slip the text to the court musician. But Millit is good too! Why the fuck did he suddenly undertake to perform someone else's creation? And so ugly...

But I was lying. For more beauty. I have not forgotten and never will. Late spring, blooming almeria bushes, a rainbow caught in the mist raised by the jets of a fountain, and a defenseless dream in the blue sky of the eyes ...

They didn't want to. They didn't call. And where did they sip

This bowl? Two or one?

Heart sank, drinking imperceptible bitterness, -

And crumbled under the feet of free wings.

But here I am no longer lying, although I speak only for myself. I never held on to my freedom, because I never had it: from my birth and long before, my fate was predetermined. Yes, in some ways, the path of life will not coincide with the visions of eternally drunken gods scratching with a pen in the Book of Existence, but little things are little things, and sooner or later they will form into a familiar boring mosaic. Probably, realizing with whom I would have to share the same years of being in the world, I was truly happy. But happiness did not want to last forever ...

We do not need a flight: let the sky miss you

By the happy cry of careless freedom -

We agree to forget the lonely years

Having found a long-awaited fiction on earth.

I really don't need an endless sky, Ney. Why, if I fly in it alone? How can you not understand...

Punishment? Curse? Miracle? Reward?

But, jealous, the gods in their hearts will turn away,

If fingers and souls intertwine with vines

And two views will merge into a single sea ...

Turned away. Already. Just at the moment when we put our fingers together. You didn't want to look me in the eye. Scared? Disdain? I have no right to blame. But I'm sorry to tears that our eyes did not meet then. You were silent throughout the wedding ceremony. I remember I tried to joke to brighten up the awkwardness of the engagement of two people who were still completely strangers to each other. In vain. You still didn't smile. Not once. Probably, she thought: what can this village goof say smart? And yes, I eventually fell silent. So we became spouses - in funeral silence, which, according to the elders wise over the years, is a bad sign and does not predispose to a long and happy marriage. And when they began to acquaint you with all the intricacies of the new position, you were even more frightened. That I can know the underside of thoughts and feelings with one breath? Maybe. And you could not believe any sworn assurances, and even the fact that for me there is nothing bad when it comes to you ... I would not believe it. But than-what, and I am endowed with patience. And I'll wait. Although I know very well that some accept their fate immediately and with all their hearts, while others never ...

The world shines with stolen sunshine

Fatherly hugging us by the shoulders.

Somewhere in the past dawn. Warm evening ahead.

We are poisoned, but we do not want to be healed.

I don't want. Are you listening, Ney? I do not want! And I can shout it to the whole world if I'm sure that you won't close your ears. I can stand up right now...