Sea Of Pain

"I love you, " Xian Chen said, his eyes full of deep sadness. What else could he have said? Whatever he said, it all boils down to two sentences. I love you, I'm sorry. The rest would have been just excuses...

"I love you too, " Yu Bin replied with a wistful smile. Ah, in front of her was the person she loved with all her heart. The person who made her see the world as it really was. In front of her was the person who was always by her side. Thinking of all the times when Xian Chen was with her, Yu Bin smiled with tears in her eyes.

[[I'm sorry, Yu Bin, I'm so sorry. It's my fault. It's my fault, I killed them all, I'm so sorry, Yu Bin]]

The words suddenly echoed in her ear, and the smile froze on her lips.

No, you can't love him. Whatever it is, she won't love him again. If she has to take her heart out of her chest, then so be it, but she won't love him again.

"What happened? " Xian Chen asked timidly. In a way, he already knew, it was over... Yu Bin had also remembered the rest of her memories. His heart crumbled again.

"You, you, you, ... you killed her. You used me to get to her. I thought we were going to be a big family, but you killed her, and my parents and ..."

She said and then stopped suddenly. She felt like she was out of breath. Just knowing, she felt how her heart was breaking piece by piece, saying out loud she felt like she had no more air. It hurt so much that she couldn't take it anymore.

"Yu Bin ...?!" Xian Chen gently called her, caressing her cheek, but Yu Bin pulled back

"Why, why did you do it?"

"Yu Bin..." He called her again softly with a trembling voice. She asked him and waited for an answer, but he had no answer for her.

He put his hands on her shoulders and hugged her to his chest

"Why ? " she asked, grabbing his shirt . When Xian Chen hugged her, Yu Bin lost all her will to fight. She wanted to stay in his arms forever. They were the same arms that had always protected her, but at the same time, they were the same arms that had killed her family. And yet she had no strength left now. She was tired... She just wanted to know why. Why did he have to do that? Why did he kill his family? Did Xian Chen hate her parents for the death of his family? Did he hate the Master for what happened then? Did he want revenge? Was Xian Chen always in pain? Why ? Why did he do this?

It's as if in one way or another, Yu Bin was trying to find a reason for him for what he did...

"Yu Bin ... I've never used you, I've always loved you. " Xian Chen also answered with a shaking voice.

"Why? why did you kill ... how could you?" Tears began to flow in torrents without stopping. She still didn't understand. For understanding the man in front of her, she first needed to understand the reason why he had to do all that ...

"Sorry."

" You said that we will always be together, you said that you, me, and master will always fight for the well-being of our people, you said that you will help me to be a better queen one day.

You said you'd always be by my side, so why? Why ?...

I hate you, I hate you so much, I hate everything that happened between us, I wish I had never known you, Xian Chen. " Yu Bin shouted loudly with her head buried in his chest, clutching the blouse that hung terribly on him because of her.

"I know I deserve it, I'm sorry. " Xian Chen answered, trembling. He didn't have any answer for her . After all, it was his fault. Whatever he would say, it was his fault. If he stayed by his master side that night, if he wouldn't leave that night ,everyone would be safe now .

Even if Yu Bin will hate what happened between them, he will always cherish them. These memories were the things that kept him going.

Tears streamed down his cheeks, and he looked so sorrowful that Moon thought Yu Bin was hurting him instead of him hurting her.

He couldn't understand what they were talking about. Who killed whom? Her parents died when she was a child, and Xian Chen is younger than her, so how can he be the killer? Because of this thought, he forgot to take pictures but watched them carefully.

After Yu Bin stopped crying and fell asleep, Xian Chen carried her back home and then left. Leaving her house, he sat down on a curb by the side of the street and cried bitterly.

Finally, he could cry his heart out. He had indeed cried in front of her, but this time, he could cry bitterly. Seeing him so desperate , Moon couldn't keep sitting there and watching. He hurried to see what was wrong with his colleague.

"What happened? Why are you crying? …Xian Chen, what happened? Tell me right now, " Moon asked worriedly, trying to pick him up

"Moon ... it's my fault. It's my fault that Yu Bin is sad. I tried my best to keep her safe, but she ended up in pain because of me."

"What are you talking about ?"

"I can't anymore. My heart hurts. I wish I hadn't come back. It's okay for Yu Bin to come back. It's okay for master Fang to come back, but not me ... I wish I hadn't come back."

"Xian Chen, are you drunk?"

"Is it? .... Am I ..? Anyway, let's go, we have a lot of work to do tomorrow…ah, yes, tomorrow, don't tell Yu Bin anything." Xian Chen replied, wiping away his tears.

"O.K ..."

Tears were still streaming down Xian Chen's face. He gathered his strength and left, leaving Yu Bin sleeping soundly.

She was safe for now, and that was all that mattered.

Saying goodbye to his colleague Xian Chen took his phone out and with trembling hands, he formed a number.

"Hello..."

"Master, can we talk?"

"Xian Xian ? are you crying? What happened?"

"Master, I can't ..."

"What do you mean kiddo, do you want to give up now? I know we were incapable last time, but now we are in a new world, with new and stronger lives, right? So how can you give up now?

"Master, what will happen when she remembers?" Xian Chen asked with a sigh.

"I'm so tired master", He added

"It will be good, I think it will be easier if she remembers,"

"I'm okay for her to hate me when she's drunk, I don't know if I'll survive when she hates me forever."

"I still don't understand. Why does she hate you?"

"Because I killed you,"

"Oh ... what? " Bao Fang shouted the last word in surprise.

"I still don't understand. Why does she hate you? She has no reason. If I remember correctly, you both were very close. I know you don't want to talk about it, but can you please tell me why she is so against you? why is it so much against you? Why does she hate you, Xian Xian ?"

"Because I killed you ...."

"Oh ... what? "

Bao Fang shouted the last word in surprise. She couldn't believe it. How could he kill her when he…

"But you ... " she added in bewilderment

"It was my fault..." Xian Chen answered, his voice trembling.

"Are you crazy? No, I'm just asking. Are you damn crazy Xian Chen? Do you want to die in my hands? How is it your fault?" Bao Fang was truly troubled because she couldn't understand what happened after her death.

"I couldn't protect you master..." Xian Chen said, looking down, tears streaming on his face like a river. His chest was feeling so heavy, and he wished he was not reborn.

" Ehhhhh ?! Xian Xian, listen to me, it's not your fault. You weren't even there, so how did you kill me?"

"Because I wasn't there ..."

" Because she was smarter, it's that thug's fault, not yours. But how could we tell Yu Bin that? She would never have believed us. If that night I could've...."

"That's why it's my fault master... if I didn't leave that night ..."

"We would both have died the same night, Xian Xian. There was no difference."

"We died anyway ..." Xian Chen said, giving up.

"Ah, yes, I always wondered. How did you both die?"

"I don't know how Yu Bin died, but I died at her hands." Xian Chen answered, looking up into the sky. At least she was the one killing him. At least he died in her hands. He was content with that one thought.

"What... ? " Bao Fang shouted in surprise again. She couldn't believe what she heard.

"Ah, my ears ...." Xian Chen cried out.

"You mean Yu Bin killed you?"

"Yes."

"But why ?"

"Because I killed you,"

"Did you tell her that?"

"Somehow, she knew she came to me and asked me if it was my fault if I had anything to do with your death."

"Did you say yes?"

"I said I'm sorry ..."

"Xian Xian, you're really stupid ..." Bao Fang shouted angrily.

"I'm sorry, master, it's my fault ..." Xian Chen said calmly, staying down on a bench.

"Silly child, if we were in our realm now, I would have beaten you to death .... you are lucky," Bao Fang said, calming herself too.

"Sorry..."

"Stop saying that and go to bed."

"Okay ....good night master,"

"Good night, Xian Xian."

"Ah, yes, Xian Xian, about the picture Yu Bin sent me….I received a phone call…

" Really? I knew you were the greatest master! Send me the number so I can talk with them early in the morning." Xian Chen said, and after saying their goodbyes, he put his phone in his pants pocket and walked away looking at the stars. Their realm should be up there.

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