2022-05-11 12:54:25
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How My Life Was Ruined 075: Growing Suspicions
I watched as Aina ran desperately and climbed the stairs.She was running away.I could see that. She had been running away for so long. I had noticed it a long time back. When she used to watch me with those eyes, with yearning. When she was with Miyamoto, she would gaze at him, longingly. Her gaze said that she wanted something more from him. Something that she wasn’t able to find in him. And that something was…me. In the first place, I think the reason she started dating Miyamoto was also me. Although I don’t know how exactly or why, but I believe I am not un-related to that matter.Shizuku Aina. A headstrong girl who doesn’t shy away from being brutally honest and telling them what needs to be said. Long brown hair and those eyes filled with determination.When I first saw her and started knowing her better, I had subconsciously started comparing her to Kaya. They were a lot similar. That was why I wanted to know just how similar they were. So, I showed her the dark side of me. Th
How My Life Was Ruined 076: Realization
It has been four days since my late-night encounter with Aina. Ever since that day, she has been avoiding me constantly and there were dark circles under her eyes probably the result of thinking about things too deep till late at night. I have had a few conversations with Nakamura and Ito and spent most of my time in class with Yamamoto. Other than that, I have kept myself holed up inside my room listening to ‘Starting Over’ by John Lennon. Somehow I have found this song to my liking and for the past few days, I have been listening to this on repeat. I am now just waiting for another song to take over.Today is the fifth day of our study camp plus tour meaning the second and first-year students could be coming any time now. Or so I thought while going down for breakfast with Yamamoto and others in tow when we saw that they had already arrived.They were the same as us, looking around the hotel with glittering eyes. The only exception was Miyamoto. He was acting calm and was following
How My Life Was Ruined 077: Betrayal
I ran towards where Miyamoto was like a madman and grabbed him by his collar. His eyes widened in surprise. The other guys appeared equally shocked.Before Miyamoto could say anything, with my hands still on his collar, I dragged him.The other boys who were standing there still, recovered from their shock, and the guy who was talking enviously about Miyamoto screamed at me.“Hey, you. What do you think you are-“ His sentence abruptly and unnaturally ended then and there as I turned around to look at him.With a murderous and threatening aura in my already cold-looking eyes, I gave a passing glance at each one of the boys present there.“Don’t butt in,” I said. Hearing my voice laced with clear animosity, the boys gulped in terror. One of them even ran away like a scared rabbit. The remaining stood there, motionless, without even drawing their breath.This much must be more than enough.After determining that, I led Miyamoto to the empty area behind the dining hall. There was no one h
How My Life Was Ruined 078: Blame It All On Me
Miyamoto Sota.I had completely read him wrong.The fact that he hated me; it wasn’t because I had committed such a horrible act. It was because he thought that I was framed by those girls; I was accused of something I hadn’t done. And instead of fighting back, I accepted and admitted it. I also left them all without saying anything and without any clarification.For Miyamoto who admired and idolized me, it must have been the greatest form of betrayal. That was why he hated me. He believed that I couldn’t commit such a horrible act. It was all a lie.But, now, he has finally learned the truth. What he had believed all these years was a big, fat lie. What he had idolized was a fake; it was someone that didn’t even exist in the first place. That realization crippled him. The only goal he had set for himself in his life was just an illusion. That goal suddenly disappeared and it was akin to the world ending for him.“Really, I do nothing but break people.”How many does it make now? I ha
How My Life Was Ruined 079: Knell
The sky outside was getting a bit darker and I could see dark clouds approaching from the eastern side.“It’s going to rain pretty heavily.”The time was around 4 pm.The classes for the day were over long ago and starting today we won’t have any classes no more. Tomorrow – that is the sixth day – and the day after tomorrow will be packed with nothing but trips to different places in Kyoto. The third-year students had a relieved face. Now they could finally get to enjoy the vacation in its truest sense.I was alone and I walked at my own pace scanning the places around me and committing every detail I saw to my memory. Today, I was once again out in search of Hayami. Even though the past two days had seen no result, I wasn’t going to give up yet. And today, I hadn’t sneaked from the hotel. There was no need to. The school had allowed us, students, to go on a stroll around Kyoto to our liking. We could go anyplace we want to as long as it wasn’t someplace shady. As a rule, we had to ke
How My Life Was Ruined 080: The Schemes
I was angry. But I didn’t feel my blood boil. Instead, I felt calm. Looking at my face, nobody will ever think that I was furious. As if to let the world know the anger raging inside me, from the heavens came a thunderous roar so loud it shook the very ground. Along with the lightning and the thunder came the drops of rain pouring.Every drop of rain felt like bullets and with each drop that hit me I felt as if wounds were opening up everywhere in my body; both old and new.As the downpour got heavy, people around me started running around trying to find a place to shelter themselves from this heavy rain.I, on the other hand, continued to run, all the while being hit by the numerous raining bullets.As I ran, the sounds of water being splashed reached my ears. Along with water, mud was being splashed everywhere including my clothes.When I no longer was able to run anymore, I stopped. Then I suddenly opened my mouth as wide as I could, gasping for air. Seems like I had stopped brea
How My Life Was Ruined 081: Ugly but Effective
When I said that, her smile that was about to reach her ears froze where it was. As if time itself had stopped.“What…do you mean?”“Listen here. You want the two of them to get remarried and I don’t want that happening. So the only solution here is to take me out of the equation. You get what I am saying?”Think about what if she had never learned that Hitomi had a son. The two of them would get remarried and the three of them will live happily ever after. If she wants to have a familial experience, then she has no choice but to ignore me. As long as she doesn’t include me, everything will fall in place.The rain was seeping into my clothes and making them heavier. I had also started feeling cold and hot at the same time. Was it just a fever or pneumonia? I didn’t know. However, I did know that I will become seriously ill if I continued to soak in this rain any longer.With my piece said, I turned around and walked towards the hotel.Because of the loud pitter and patter of the rain,
How My Life Was Ruined 082: Already Betrayed
We were allowed to go outside today as well for the same time period of 4 pm to 7 pm and of course, we had to follow the same rules. The student identity card I was carrying around my neck was swinging here and there in random directions as I walked around the streets of Kyoto in search of Hayami. I went to different bars and hotels and other shady places while keeping my identity hidden. I didn’t want to leave a single place unexplored. Even then, I still had no results to name. I didn’t even have any leads to work with.I continued my search for about an hour. When the clock hit 5 pm, I stopped my search for the day.Today, I had some other plans in store.I took out my phone and checked the location I had been sent in advance.“Oh, it’s not that far from here.”I walked for five minutes down the narrow street and took a right turn to a dark alleyway with barely any light even though it wasn’t night yet. As I walked, I could see light up ahead. Leaving the alleyway behind, I was led
Latest Chapter
Afterword
If you are reading this afterword instead of reading the story, then, please go and read the story first! However, if you are here after following the gruesome journey and the end of Kageyama Kage, then, I have to thank you from the bottom of my heart to have given this novel a chance. Now, then, about this story. You know, we humans, are contradictory in nature. In the little things we do and speak, there is always a small contradiction there. We might fail to notice them, but it doesn't mean we don't contradict ourselves. Similarly, we humans, also go through our fair share of hardships and pain. It is inevitable. I have had my fair share of them and you all have too. This story, 'How My Life Was Ruined', is a story where the contradiction is exaggerated - no - overexaggerated and at the same time, I (being the overthinker I am) took the various problems people around me faced and converted it into a story. A story where we don't see a redemption arc. A story where all that await
130: The End And The Beginning
Furukawa Maya and Maki were in the Director’s room.The atmosphere was gloomy and heavy.No one said a word but they both knew what was on their minds.“So we failed to save him.” Maki was the one to say that sentence. She clenched her fists and bit her lips. She had failed to save the person her dear sister had been trying to protect. As a sister, she had failed to fulfill her duties and that realization left a bitter taste in her mouth.“No point in beating yourself over that. The moment Kaya died, everything was as good as hopeless.”That had been the last straw.Kaya had been the one to have held Kageyama down to this world. She had cast chains on him and shackled him. But when she died, the chains came off and he plunged to his doom.No, even after that, there was still a chance to save him. If not for the girl, Hayami. The girl that didn’t exist. The girl that never existed in the first place.“Hallucination, was it?” Maki spoke.After Kageyama’s death, the Director told her abo
129: After The End - III
Aina had been hurt by the news of Kageyama Kage's death.The shock was so much that when she first learned of the truth she ended up fainting on the spot.Even after regaining her consciousness, she hadn’t been able to stomach the truth. The fact that the one she had loved was no more in this world had left her unable to think of anything for a long while.She continued to think. Day and night without an ounce of sleep.Why? Why did Kageyama end his life? She knew why he did. She knew of his whole story. Any normal person would have ended his life long ago if they had had to go through such hardships and pain. The fact that Kage had managed to act like a normal person when he had such a heavy history dragging him down was nothing sort of miracle.But, still, there were many questions she wanted to know the answers to.Like, why did they allow Kageyama the opportunity to end his life?Hadn’t the Director assured her that they were trying to prevent that from happening? She had seen tha
128: After The End - II
The news of Kageyama’s death had saddened both Yamamoto and Ito.For Yamamoto, Kageyama had been a good friend. He even considered him his best friend. That was how much he trusted and not to mention admired him.Kageyama had been his savior. Crushed by the guilt that he hadn’t been able to save Yua back then and unable to take any action, he had already given up. The one who gave him the push to take action and make things right was none other than Kageyama. If he hadn’t come into his life, then he wouldn’t have been able to do anything. He would have most definitely remained frozen as always while he watched Yua suffer more and more every day and he kept lamenting. Kageyama was his hero. And so he was for Yua as well.Yamamoto knew that Yua was in love with Kageyama. Although he was hurt, he didn’t hate him. In fact, he thought it was inevitable that she falls in love with him. He had saved her from what seemed like an impossible situation. He had dragged her out of that muddy world
127: After The End - I
The news had made headlines across the country.No matter which channel Nakamura switched to, everywhere, it was the same news, the same grisly spectacle and the same pain of having lost someone important assaulted her.She shouldn’t have been surprised. He had tried to end his life once. It shouldn’t have been surprising that he would try to do the same. What was surprising was how short the interval between his attempted suicide and death was. She had expected the authorities to take some action to prevent that from happening and they did take action and kept him under surveillance but he had somehow managed to escape and end his life.She turned off the TV and sat on the floor facing the veranda.A cold wind blew and sent her hair flying. She looked to her right. There was no one.If he had been alive, he would probably be outside on the veranda.If he had been alive. But the fact was that he wasn’t.Nakamura knew that Kageyama had wanted to end his life. She always had thought tha
126: The End Of The Story
“Finally.”I muttered as I stood on the edge of the rooftop holding hands with Hayami.The cold wind ruffled our hairs.I was battered. Bruise covered my body here and there and there was also a gun wound on my lower leg. Hayami had ripped her skirt to tie it around my leg to prevent blood loss. Although I found it hilarious that she was trying to prevent the blood loss of someone who was going to die soon, I didn’t speak a word and let her do her work.“We can finally die.”Although I had wanted to go in a grand way, this was good in its own way. It gave me the adrenaline rush that made my spirit pump even more.Suicide?No.Don’t term what we are about to do with something as petty and cowardly as suicide.It was the only good thing that I was going to do ever in my life. Everyone should be overjoyed that I was about to remove a corrupt and wretched existence from this world.My life, not only was it meaningless, it was sought with suffering, pain, chaos, betrayal, deceit, and every
125: The Escape
I went back and sat down on my earlier seat.My mom came out of the bathroom after a few minutes.Her face was wet. She probably washed her face so that she could hide the fact that she was crying. But her red eyes gave it away. The pain was still there in her face.I handed her the towel lying on the sofa. She dried her face with that and shortly after the old hag came in.I took out my phone and started scrolling through the feed on social media. Though I was still paying keen attention to the old hag.Hmm.Just then I noticed the two of them make eye contact. It was nothing unusual but it definitely caught my attention.The time was 3 in the morning. I ended up staying awake all night today.“Furukawa-san, why don’t you stay till morning? You probably are hungry with all the speaking and work. I will whip up something quickly and you can take a short nap to give some rest to your body till the morning.”“Hmm.” The old hag seemed to be thinking about her proposal and eventually, she
124: I Have Never Hated you
For the next five minutes after my mom dashed to the bathroom, no one spoke. I feel like these long and short stretches of silence in the middle of conversations were happening a lot to me. Was it a meaningful silence or a meaningless one? Did the silence speak louder than the words or was it just and merely silence? I don’t know.“She sure is taking long. What must she be doing?” The old hag broke the silence with a meaningful question.“Yeah, I wonder what.”Although I knew what she wanted to hear from me, I played the fool. I knew what she was doing in the bathroom. She was without a doubt crying her eyes out hurt by the scathing words of her own son.The old hag gave me a smile as if she had seen that coming.“Putting aside your words that you being born itself was the root of it all, don’t you feel angry?”“Angry? Why?”“If you hadn’t learned what your mom had been doing, things wouldn’t have gone that out of hand. Let’s say if your mom hadn’t been cheating on your dad, if Nakamu
123: The One Grave Mistake
After calming down a bit, I looked down to the dining area from the stairs. The old hag was sitting there waiting for someone. And I knew that someone was me.“Hayami, you go wait for a little longer.”“Hmm. Okay~” Although, she seemed reluctant after I gave her a kiss, she went back to the room. After hearing the click of the door locking, I made my way downstairs and sat in an empty chair facing the old hag.“Why are you here?” I asked.“We heard from Aina's parents that she had run away from home and would like our help to search for her. That’s why I am here.”So I was right that she had run away from home without telling anyone.“But, why are you here? How did you know Aina would be here?” Did she know beforehand that the only place Aina will head to after running from her home under the current circumstances will be my house? I could think of the old hag arriving to that conclusion. She was quick-witted after all.“No. We just followed her path.” She continued. “We checked the C
