I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please

Ch26 - Efficiency

No longer being supported by telekinesis, the rack of merchandise heavily crashes back onto the ground. Surprisingly, only a single shirt slips off of its hanger onto the ground, otherwise, all of the remaining merchandise stays more or less in place.

Mind Flare sighs heavily, every ounce of his body language expressing how absolutely done he is. Pulling a handkerchief out from one of his suit jacket's pockets, he carefully dabs some of the blood off of his face, taking care not to smudge his makeup. After doing this, he wipes his hands off a bit as well, dropping the handkerchief onto the soiled floor once he's done. Then, he raises his right hand to blow out two short whistles using his thumb and index finger.

With far less care than Mind Flare had used, Lucas pulls his hoodie off to wipe his hands and face on the inside of it as he had done earlier. He hands the hoodie over for Jonathan to do the same, once he has his breathing under control. It seems Jonathan has yet to master the art of breathing blood.

While they can't help watching Mind Flare a bit nervously, they do understand that he clearly has no malicious intent towards them.

While handling the hoodie, they notice that the blood seems to be sliding right off of the paint-saturated areas. Perhaps there were waterproof top-coat cans in the mix, or some sealant.

'...Weirdly cool. Wait, when did I become so numb to watching people die horribly right in front of me?'

[I'd say the subway station was the final tipping point.]

'I'm not sure which is more unnerving, the fact that you were able to point it out immediately, or the fact that I'm pretty sure you're right.'

The insurmountable shoe tower, long may it reign, blocked off the bulk of the burst of blood from tainting the neatly folded pile of purchases. The tower itself, however, now proudly bears the marks of its provided succor. It's an absolute mess.

The currently painted red service bot pokes about in the storage area under the register briefly, pulls out a towel to wipe itself off first, and then begins cleaning the check-out counter.

Mind Flare pointedly does not look directly in Lucas and Jonathan's direction, instead, looking past the two now-headless corpses over to the resplendent shoe tower. Recrossing his arms, he taps his right index finger against his left upper arm, frowning for the first time in the time since the duo has made his acquaintance. Noticing his side profile that shows how deep in thought he is, Lucas doesn't hesitate to speak up.

"It's... It's fine. As long as the actual goods are fine, I don't mind if the boxes are stained. Just... Just wipe off the bulk of it before packin' 'em up to ship out is all I ask. And... I get it. We get it. We're all supes here, and those guys were assholes." Hearing Lucas speak up, Mind Flare's immediate relief is unmistakable. Jonathan is aggressively nodding along with his statement, giving an affirmative hum.

"Are you sure? It's not your fault in the least, after all. Ah, I'm terribly sorry that you had to bear witness, it's quite an unsightly thing." Even though he still won't look directly at them, it's clear that he is being sincere.

'Oh, he's self-conscious about it, isn't he? Or at least, really doesn't want other people to see his messed up makeup, heh.'

[That seems to be the case.]

Clearing his throat while he puts the sullied hoodie back on once again, Lucas continues to placate the slightly sulky supervillain.

"It's fine. Really. Though uhh... Where's the bathroom?" Before Lucas can continue further, Mind Flare briefly raises a hand to cut him off. Once Lucas falls silent, he re-crosses his arms, resuming his tapping.

Now that a bit of time has passed, the sounds of squeaky wheels and multiple walking service bots approach. It seems this may be why Mind Flare whistled earlier.

There are a total of three bots, two of which are pushing huge plastic-bag-lined bins on wheels, large enough to fit three adult men in each. The third is pushing a cart with a stack of towels, miscellaneous cleaning supplies, and a mop paired with a soapy water-filled bucket.

'I'm starting to become uncomfortable with just how prepared they are for this. Wait, did he whistle twice because that's how many bodies there were?'

[...It's certainly efficient.]

The bot that was pushing the cleaning cart walks up to stand before Mind Flare at attention, holding out a small, warm, damp towel. The other two bots work together to move the headless bodies into one bin, and the merchandise that will require more than just a spot clean into the other.

With the bot before him, Mind Flare finally stops tapping his index finger against his arm. Accepting the towel to better wipe off his hands, he juts his chin in the duo's direction.

"Take these two gentlemen to freshen up, full VIP treatment." Once he gives this command, he bows his head slightly in the duo's direction before walking away, wiping off his exposed skin with the towel as he goes. Regardless of how irritated he may be, he maintains the same composed rhythm as always with each step.

Receiving its orders, the bot goes back to its cleaning cart briefly, claiming two more similar towels for the duo. Handing one to each of them, it begins its spiel.

"Good afternoon honored guests. Allow me to apologize once again on behalf of our fine establishment. If you would be so kind as to follow me, I shall guide you two to a specially reserved bathing area. If I may have your relevant sizing and preferred colors, I will acquire a change of clothing for you in the meantime, all services free of charge. Our top-of-the-line private laundromat will tend to your current garments, unless you should desire otherwise. You may continue shopping once you have freshened up, or we can provide you with a ticket to reclaim your possessions at a later date at your convenience."

Once it ensures that they are following, the service bot guides Lucas and Jonathan to an elevator marked with a sign reading "Employees Only".

Lucas is a bit stunned and doesn't answer right away. Jonathan, on the other hand, has wide eyes and a bounce to his step, nearly starting to blurt out his response. Hesitating with his mouth open before actually saying anything, he stops and looks at Lucas, waiting for him to go first.

"I, er, no color preference. Whatever you have an excess of in-stock I guess, as long as it's comfy. Uh, medium across the board, shoe size-" Lucas begins giving his answers, let's spare you the details from him as well as Jonathan following after.

Once they've all entered the elevator, the bot takes them up to the eighth floor.

Reaching their destination, one look is enough to tell that this is a high-end spa, staffed entirely by service bots.

'Okay, so a private laundromat sorta makes sense... But, a spa? What the hell else is in this building?'

[Well, it's also Mind Flare's HQ, so it shouldn't be too surprising, all things considered. I'll operate under the assumption that was a rhetorical question, as opposed to listing everything off.]

'...Now I'm even more curious? No, none of my business, forget it.'

[As you wish.]

Being spoiled to this degree is a rare occurrence, and it's all free, so the duo decides they may as well make the most of it. It's all robots here anyway, who's gonna judge them?

Lucas leisurely washes up in the available shower, taking his time in being pampered afterward.

Jonathan, on the other hand, races through a shower and then takes a nap in a mineral bath. His companion is a rubber duckie he got from who-knows-where, resting on a neatly folded towel on top of his head.

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Lucas kills this chapter: 0

Lucas total kills: 6

Lucas deaths this chapter: 0

Lucas total deaths: 6

Lucas current GDV: 4.48 (+.01 net change)

Jonathan current GDV: .75 (+.01 net change)

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Little character theater:

Jonathan is too busy napping as hard as he possibly can. Shopping is such tiring work for a growing boy.

Lucas, melting from a back massage: Maybe being Mind Flare's sidekick wouldn't be such a bad idea?

427, at a complete loss on how to deal with Lucas: [Weren't you scared of him just a moment ago? Just pick out your own amenities once you have a base...]

Author, with strict authority: By the power vested in me, I declare that Jonathan gets a rubber duckie friend.