Last Updated:
2024-10-29 19:42:56Very slowly, Lucas has finished painstakingly removing each and every tag from everything they brought home and putting all of the relevant things into the washer, as well as prepping it to run but leaving its door open.
As Lucas plops down onto the patched-up sofa and starts channel surfing in order to distract himself, a clean and mostly dried-off dog darts out of the bathroom to roll around on the wall-to-wall carpeting of the living room, kicking his legs happily into the air. Jonathan's laughing can be heard from the bathroom for a few seconds before he shuts the door.
Lucas is so delighted by the sight, he drops the TV remote he was previously holding right on the floor and gets up to run over and play with the dog. Unfortunately for 427, he has yet again released the mental pterodactyl-screech assault of happiness.
[Oh for the love of... Please. I'm begging you. Don't. Just, don't make that awful sound.]
'Eheheh, sorry. But seriously, LOOK AT HIM. Erhmahgerd, too cute.'
[...I'm glad you're happy. Really. Just, please, that sound is so awful. I can't just cover my ears or anything to help offset it either.]
'Hrm... True... But, counterargument; Look at how cute that dog is.'
[…]
'Okay, okay. I'll try not to. D'aww, those little toe beans...'
427 lets out a sigh as Lucas lies down on the floor on his side, next to the energetically rolling pup.
The TV is entertaining itself with the evening news, not that any living creature in the room is paying it an ounce of attention.
With Lucas's dog-observation skills running at 110%, he makes a fresh discovery.
"Oh, I thought you had some black spots too, but you were seriously just that dirty?" When he asks this out loud, he gets an energetic bark in response. Lucas bursts out laughing at the enthusiastic answer.
"Is that really something to sound so proud about?" Still chuckling, Lucas has now initiated belly-rub protocols. This time he gets two barks as an answer.
Taking a few moments to think it over, Lucas comes to a different realization. "Oh, it's that yer just that happy to finally be clean again?" When Lucas asks this, he gets another enthusiastic single bark.
Lucas laughs a bit more at the happy doggo, then he rolls over to grab some of the recently purchased dog toys to assist the pup in quality control research.
After some time of rigorous play-testing, Lucas is vaguely aware of Wraith Hunter's voice coming from the TV but doesn't think anything of it. He's spent so much time today with that voice as part of the background, it doesn't even register as unusual in his brain.
Between the frenzied squeaks of the large stuffed duck suffering the dog's onslaught, the sound of the bathroom door creaking open can just barely be heard. Jonathan comes out wrapped in a far too-large plush navy blue bathrobe, the bottom hem nearly touching the ground.
The washing machine spinning up into the final drain cycle seems intent on joining in on the noisiness competition. The duck's squeaker is still in the lead though.
"Hah! And I thought that thing was huge on me!" Lucas can't resist taunting the young teen from his position on the ground, sprawled out prone beside the doggo. Jonathan pouts slightly from the attack on his stature, driving Lucas to laugh even more while he gently pats the dog's back a few times before standing up again.
Jonathan's line of sight stays on the ground where Lucas was just laying, the left corner of his mouth twitching a bit. Seeing his expression, Lucas looks down and realizes that the majority of the concrete dust that was still on him is now on the floor instead. And on the dog too. Oops.
"...Where is your vacuum?" It seems that Jonathan wishes to invite a new challenger to the commotion competition. There's nothing quite like spending some time homeless to make you appreciate what you have and wanting to take care of it.
The dog freezes mid-attack for a few seconds, then resumes his assault on the faux fowl as if nothing happened.
"Eh? In the extra room at the end of the hall, I just use it for stor-" As Lucas is answering, he gets distracted by 427 suddenly laughing.
'Eh?'
[You really can't manage to stay off the news, can you? Look.]
With this prompt, Lucas turns over to see himself starting to uproot the thick concrete pole of the streetlamp with the electronic pedestrian crossing sign mounted on it. The video is at a slightly crooked angle, seeming to have been shot with a cellphone from the coffee shop across the street from Faunahorde, which is diagonally across the intersection from MF's Fashion Boutique.
Lucas laughs a bit and can't help pointing at the TV, turning to face Jonathan. "Ayyy, I know that guy." As the mutt hears Lucas say this, he stops the attack on ducky to look up and sees him on TV.
Jonathan looks over at the TV as well, chuckles a bit then walks off in pursuit of the vacuum cleaner.
Much like a bird preening in front of a mirror, Lucas is standing, transfixed, in the middle of the living room, intently watching the TV.
'Ha, look at that form, that technique! Ten outta ten, perfect score, would smash the front of a truck in again.'
[…]
The crystal-clear video keeps playing, showing the cloud of concrete dust settling a bit and Lucas walking around the truck to the far side away from the camera. After a few moments, it can be seen that the door of the truck suddenly flew away and the driver gets pulled out in short order, vanishing from view.
After the two men are out of sight for a few seconds, a faintly familiar female voice from near the source of the recording sounds out. "Oh, I gotta see this."
The recording shakes a bit, then the view is from the perspective of running out of the coffee store and crossing the crosswalk, weaving through traffic to do so. The recording zooms in on the still-sparking wires coming out of the hole in the ground where the pole was removed for a few seconds, accompanied by the sound of the woman that is doing the recording letting out an impressed whistle. Next, the shot pans back up to show Lucas sitting on the back of the driver that is half-submerged in the pavement.
"Aww, I missed it!" The almost recognizable female voice then transitions to laughter after saying this, zooming in a bit on Lucas for a few seconds. The shot then pans back out and slowly goes over all of the various supervillains present at the scene, paired with the running commentary of who each of the known supervillains are in an excited voice.
The excited tone of voice is what finally drives home why her voice seems familiar; it's the owner of the handbag that led to all of the events resulting in Lucas getting caught up with the Superhero Enhancement System.
As this realization comes to Lucas, the tips of his ears turn a bit red.
'Wait, she was ACTIVELY WATCHING ME? Isn't that, like, way creepy?'
[...Hardly the strangest thing a fangirl has done.]
'Urk, yeah, I guess...'
The video from the recording finally comes to an end, the TV screen now shows Wraith Hunter seated near the familiar blonde news anchor who is giving him an interview. Lucas's mind is still thinking about his stalker, merely considering Wraith Hunter's voice as white noise.
"Yeah, he was a huge help. His name's Lu- ahem, Xenoclast. He said he's going to be registering his own organization tomorrow morning, and that kid you saw is going to be his sidekick. He goes by Jackknife." Just before Wraith Hunter casually exposes them on television, Jonathan has come back out into the living room with the dusty vacuum cleaner. He gasps when he hears the name-dropping.
"Uh, isn't it kinda, um, kinda bad to get well known like this?" As Jonathan points this out, Lucas groans and covers his face with his hands.
"Seriously, now that crazy lady knows my name!" As usual, Lucas has focused on the wrong thing.
The pup at Lucas's feet gives an inquisitive sounding bark as he finally turns his attention away from the television, looking up at Lucas instead.
"Eh? That chick that recorded the video! I've helped her before and she got all weird about it!" As Lucas declares this in a sorrowful voice, Jonathan breaks out laughing.
The dog pants a bit, sounding a lot like his own form of laughter. He keeps this up until he finally notices the vacuum and runs to the bathroom in a panic to escape its wrath.
-----
Lucas kills this chapter: 0
Lucas total kills: 6
Lucas deaths this chapter: 0
Lucas total deaths: 10
Lucas current GDV: 5.76 (+.01 net change)
Lucas's fame level: 2* (Mostly just local)
Lucas's hero suspicion level: 1* (Only highly paranoid people)
Jonathan kills this chapter: 0
Jonathan total kills: 4
Jonathan deaths this chapter: 0
Jonathan total deaths: 2
Jonathan current GDV: 1.56 (+.01 net change)
Jonathan's fame level: 1.5* (Just local)
Jonathan's hero suspicion level: 1* (Only highly paranoid people)
-----
Little character theater:
Jonathan, now laughing at the dog: Uhh, if he's so smart, why is he still afraid of vacuums?
Lucas, ready to dash after the pup: Don't worry buddy, I hate them too!
Spooked pupper, questing for a safe space from the horror which is vacuum cleaner: Bark bark! Bark bark!
427 continues to be rendered silent by Lucas's behavior, for the hundredth time.
Author, nodding with their arms crossed: I mean, the noise that vacuum cleaners tend to make IS pretty awful.
Mr. Quacks, confident he would hold up better against the pup's playtime than how the stuffed duck was fairing: Quack!
Previous Chapter
Related Chapters
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch41 - Judgement
"Bah, whatever. It shouldn't be enough for anyone to be wary of us, yeah? No point worrying about it, I guess... Ugh, I really am creeped out knowing she was watching me like that though... Oh, er, thanks for cleaning up!" As Lucas looks at the TV one last time, he acknowledges Jonathan before running off to grab some towels and a change of clothes for himself. Once he has all of his selections, he goes into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.A slightly stunned Jonathan stands in place for a moment, staring at the recently shut bathroom door.[I'd say that while it isn't a good thing to get this kind of publicity right away, it shouldn't be too much of a threat. We're going to have to work on some villain-appropriate PR moves sooner than initially planned though.]
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch42 - Top Dog
"Okay fine, we'll clean the place up soon! Ugh, most of the stuff in the front room is probably junk anyway, we should be able to clear it out enough that you can have your own bedroom... Don't look at me like that! I'm not some hoarder or anything like that!" As Lucas caves under Jonathan's judgmental stare, he even feels like the dog is judging him too. Which he is."If that's not a hoarder, then what else do you call someone that keeps a room full of junk for no good reason?!" As Jonathan subconsciously channels the wrath of his mother that disowned him, Lucas can't help but sputter a bit."I'm just a... Lazy... Pack-rat... That really doesn't sound much better, does it..." As Lucas achieves enlightenment with this rare bout of introspection, he exhales a deep sigh.
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch43 - Found Family
"All right, enough of that. Seriously though, we need to at least come up with a name, if nothing else. I was lookin' at some existing ones, seems the bar for naming is uh... Pretty low." After speaking just a few words, Lucas has already turned and started walking away from the bathroom. He doesn't even remotely bother to check if Jonathan is actually following or not.Once he makes it to the coffee table, Lucas grabs his laptop and goes over to plop down onto the patched-up sofa. As he settles in, he kicks his feet up onto the coffee table and pats the sofa cushion next to him a few times, encouraging the pup to come up and join him. Instead, he suddenly gains a Jonathan, who ends up picking up the pup to hold on his lap. Once the pupper is in place, he leans over to look at the laptop screen.'Yeah, one day is definite
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch44 - Weird Threat, But Okay.
With everyone turning their attention back on track, they don't make it very far into the list before Jonathan speaks up with a confused voice."Wait... Alliance of Salvation? What... What kind of supervillain team name is that?" While he does a double-take and asks this out loud, he furrows his brows to the point they're practically touching. On the other hand, Lucas bursts out laughing."Right!? I had the same thought when I first saw 'em, so I looked 'em up. Turns out they're mainly a drug cartel, specializin' in some seriously heavy stuff. Like, whatever that dude that was harassing you this morning was on type shit. So yeah, the name weirdly makes sense in context. I'm pretty sure that if their HQ burned down, they'd probably get the entire country high. ...And give everyone cancer or some shit too." As Lucas gives this
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch45 - Awooo!!!
Continuing on with laughing their way through the exceedingly long list of supervillain organizations, another F name catches Lucas's eye.'Oh? Floralanche? Heh, sounds like they should be neighbors with Dan.'[They practically are. They're three buildings down the block from Faunahorde. As far as I am aware, the florist shop's owner Nightshade personally tends to the growth of all of the seeds, fruit, and various other vegetation that the miscellaneous inhabitants of Faunahorde consume.]'Oh, hey. They related or something?'[Not as far as I am aware.]'Huh.'"Um... Luca
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch46 - Hamster Nest
While Jonathan is still having fun role-playing as a beam of happy sunlight, Lucas resumes scrolling through the absurdly long listing of supervillain organizations.Only a little further into the S section, Lucas bursts out laughing, bringing an abrupt end to Jonathan's LARPing session.As Jonathan's curiosity takes over, he looks at the inciting name, thinking for a brief moment before promptly joining in the laughter."How fuckin' petty do you have to be to name your organization 'Slaying Doom Flock'!? What did the boss of 'Doom Flock' do to you, bro!?" As Lucas manages to say this between bouts of laughter, he slaps his thigh as he leans forward for a moment.[It's a good thing you just got that endurance en
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch47 - Baconeggncheeseonaroll
After a blissfully peaceful night of rest, Lucas is annoyed awake by a beam of sunshine sneaking through the gaps in his curtains. Trying to escape the offending daylight, he rolls over to his other side, keeping his eyes tightly shut.As he's trying to fall back asleep, after a few seconds he notices an odd smell. Not particularly strong or offensive, but uniquely different from anything he's woken up to before.Once curiosity overwhelms his desire to attempt catching additional zzz's, he slowly opens his eyes, freezing in place for a moment while his brain catches up to current events.He's instantly reminded that he no longer lives alone perforce of the sight before him. This view being that of a surprisingly large pair of fuzzy dark brown balls about 2 inches away
I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please Ch48 - Murder Weapon
Once the majority of the contents of the bag have been demolished, Lucas is still slowly eating the last of the extra-crispy home fries with his bare hands.The pup is sprawled out on his stomach, his long spindly front legs awkwardly holding a plain bagel in place as he slowly gnaws on it, more for the sheer sake of chewing on it and not because he has any lingering hunger at this point.Jonathan has already finished eating and has washed his hands free of any lingering bacon grease, though he had notably eaten the most out of the three of them, and by no small margin either.As should be no surprise to anyone, no small amount of home fry crumbs have landed on the cursed patch of carpet. However, with the power of snoot, the dog resolved that issue quickly enough. Jon
Latest Chapter
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 11 - System Updates
Lucas and Jonathan—dressed decently but nowhere near as fancy as yesterday—are most of the way to Cat’s Paw Cafe, pointedly not utilizing the stinky subway station to get there.‘Ya know, it’s been surprisingly peaceful, yeah? Though, not havin’ people gawk as much as yesterday is kinda nice. All that attention was gettin’ old fast.’[Ahem, well, fortunately, Boss System approved my long-term task priority filtering proposal.]‘Oh? Whassat?’[Compared to before, now it requires an opt-in before being bombarded with every single task in range. Before receiving alerts—and therefore penalties for ignoring them—we’ll run the calculations of the tasks’ estimated impact vs. potential unwanted attention. This effectively weeds out a majority of minor tasks—plus some moderate ones—by accounting for how suspicious it would be for you to know the event was taking place, let alone be believably compelled to interfere. I knew there was no need to ask if you were interested in activating it immedi
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 10 - Chosen Chores
Once the allotted thirty minutes have passed—precisely down to the second—427 tentatively undeafens Lucas. At first, all he can hear is a booklet’s pages being flipped through, followed by Lucas grumbling.Hesitantly removing the remaining sensory suppressions one at a time, 427 nearly sighs with relief upon discovering that Lucas is standing in the kitchenette by the new automatic drip coffee maker—thankfully dressed—in the midst of poorly attempting to demystify its instruction manual.‘How the hell is this so complicated?’[Ah, making good on your promise to Jonathan?]‘Oh, thank fuck; yer back. Took ya long enough.’[…Hello, again, to you, too.]‘Yeah, yeah, yeah. Welcome back. So, anywho, can ya scan through this or somethin’ and tell me how to use it?’[…I already looked up the instructions from everything’s model numbers earlier. First, measure out—]427 guides Lucas through measuring and grinding a serving’s worth of coffee beans and setting it up in the machine with such in-d
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 9 - Solitary Request
For a few peaceful minutes, Lucas delights in demolishing the delicious delicatessen delivery. As Jonathan reaches for his coffee cup to gauge if it’s cool enough for a sane person to drink, he ends up cutting himself off with a yawn, earning a side-eye from Lucas.“Hey, ya barely got any sleep, yeah? Instead of havin’ caffeine, shouldn’t ya go take a nap?” Upon Lucas’s question, Jonathan pauses, looking at the contents of his mug with an obvious longing. “I’ll make ya a fresh one in like half an hour; I’m sure 427 can figure out howta use whatever newfangled machine ya got,” Lucas continues, his eyes also fixed on the beverage.[…I suppose I appreciate your vote of confidence.]Jonathan’s gaze lingers on the coveted coffee for a moment before he sets it back on the table. As soon as he lets go of it, Lucas lays his claim upon it.“Um, o-okay, yeah. I just, um, sh-should take a shower first,” Jonathan stammers as he stands.Lucas hums an agreement around a mouthful of coffee.[Did y
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 8 - Good Un-Morning
Thankfully, there are no further interruptions during the rest of this round of deliveries. Or even during the next one, either.Once Jonathan finally has the fourth and final load of freight, he makes a detour to a delicatessen. More specifically, the one where he previously purchased yesterday’s breakfast.After equally uneventfully acquiring milk, third breakfast for himself, and first breakfast for Lucas—since he’d totally only eat sugary baked goods if real food wasn’t conveniently available—he makes his way home.With his back to the recently re-locked front door, Jonathan reclaims the last armload of supplies as he looks at Lucas’s still-shut bedroom door.‘…Our food will still be too hot to eat for a little while; I’ll make some coffee first.’Jonathan may or may not be making up excuses to keep putting off waking up Lucas in the hopes that he’ll do so on his own, knowing full well that he probably won’t.While taking longer than necessary to decide which appliance to christen
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 7 - Ongoing Onerous Obligations
“Ah! Um…” Jonathan’s face scrunches up a bit as he looks over his pending purchases.‘Can we at least turn off tasks while my hands are full? I really don’t want to drop everything and have it get broken or stolen by the time I get back to it… It will be annoying enough having to run back and forth a bunch.’[Requesting temporary task suppression… Permission granted; disregarding minor tasks for one hour at no penalty, effective immediately.]Jonathan barely represses his urge to sigh with relief.Before Ji Soo works up the nerve to express concern over Jonathan’s vacant stare at the wall behind the service bot, Jonathan’s attention returns to reality and redirects to said bot.“Um, c-could you hold some of it for a few minutes once I’m done paying? I-I won’t take long… Like, five minutes?” Before fidgety Jonathan even finishes asking his question, the bot is already nodding.“Certainly. Do you wish to use a private scanning kiosk to complete your order?”‘I’m surprised it’s even an
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 6 - Whole Latte Shopping
Jonathan, however, doesn’t hear the utterance of recognition. Unaware, he continues his quest for a coffee maker.A short time later, Jonathan stands--while quietly grumbling--before a row of two-in-one coffee/espresso machines.Behind him is a sea of drip coffee machines, with cold press equipment further off to the side. Alongside the arrangement of two-in-ones sits a selection of espresso machines, both automatic and semi-automatic.‘How are there so many!? What even are the differences? Wait, no, don’t answer that. The technical details will probably just be even more confusing.’[Understood.]Although Jonathan notices movement in his peripheral vision, he doesn’t outwardly react to the recent arrival at the end of the aisle. Instead, he pulls out one of the two-in-one machines set at eye level, rotating it so he can read the back of the box.“Ah! Don’t get one of those! That entire line is overpriced trash,” the newcomer blurts out, muffled by the layers of carbon-filter fabric f
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 5 - The Worst Part of Waking Up Is Almost Endless Tasks
After the harrowing--see also; totally normal--experience of getting his hair professionally cut, Jonathan blinks a few times as he looks himself over in the mirror. ‘Oh, wow. That’s way better.’ He’s now sporting a long-top, backswept, tapered hairstyle with a rounded back. Given how clearly tense he was throughout the entire cutting process, a trendy skin fade would have fairly obviously been too much for his liking. After giving Jonathan a few moments to make his mental evaluations, one of the hairdresser’s dreadlocks uses a soft-bristle brush to clear away the loose hair clippings around the collar of the barber cape. A few other coils of his hair organize the various tools he used, setting them aside for cleaning. Meanwhile, he quickly sweeps aside the bulk of the rogue tufts of hair on the ground in a much more conventional hands-on-broom method as he uses the mirror to make eye contact with Jonathan again. “Lookin’ good, mon. Well? Whaddya tink?” His question pulls Jonath
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 4 - Coiffure Conundrum
Once Jonathan is finally en route to the hairdresser...[Safe distance from Mikah’s power detected. Alert; you have exceeded 10 GDV. You have one enhancement available.]‘Oh! Um, you said before that rank three vision should be good enough to see through Maria’s powers, right?’[Correct, rank three should be sufficient as long as her target is in motion. Rank four would be necessary to see anything stationary, given the current strength of her powers. Please be aware that going beyond rank three for any individual enhancement has additional requirements.]‘Three should be good enough to avoid most of her pranks... Use my upgrade on vision.’[Please confirm that you would like rank two vision.]‘Yeah.’[Understood. Please close your eyes during calibrations to avoid nausea.]Jonathan slows from running at enhanced speed into a normal-paced jog for a few steps, then stops and shuts his eyes.[Bzzt... Calibrations complete.]He opens his eyes and looks around, blinking several times.‘Wo
- I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please
Vol 2 Ch 3 - Chaos in the Streets, Asleep in the Sheets
The duo’s fiery funnel further forces the growing multi-car pile-up towards the middle of the street for a few seconds longer. Finally, the flames falter and fade. After a short delay, the wind wanes as well.‘Oh, I shouldn’t give them any extra reasons to think I’m a threat.’Jonathan swiftly shuts and pockets his switchblade as he follows the sidewalk. While doing so, his attention flicks between the ongoing chaos in the street and the front door of Howling Cartographer’s HQ lobby.Ashley steps through the door with Jason right behind her. They both take a moment to appreciate their destructive handiwork with smug expressions. Considering that Jonathan is conspicuously the only person still in the immediate vicinity, they quickly focus on him.Before either of them manage anything beyond a glare, Jonathan raises both hands in a submissive gesture, showing that he isn't wielding a weapon. "I-I just wanted his gun!"Ashley's exposed eye squints with amusement, the not hair-hidden cor
