Nothing Wrong

5

Five thirty AM and I'm on my way to work. The traffic is amazing at this time of day. I glance in the rearview mirror and glimpse my reflection in the dull morning light. My face is swollen and one eye is partly closed on top of that I have scratches down my cheek from the shuffle with that scum bag mugger. There is no doubt in my mind that there will be questions about it all. I figured that it would be plausible that I had a few drinks on the weekend and upset my neighbour and this happened. I think the best lies have a little bit of truth that way it's harder to trip yourself up.

The reason for setting off for work early this morning was to go and get the number plates off the car I saw the other day that was identical to mine. Going on my way to work gave me a reason for being out at this time of day if the police pulled me over. The other reason was there was a good chance the car would still be here and not many people around. To keep my face hidden I wore a cap with a peak on it pulled down. I didn't want to just pull my hud up as that would restrict my vision and reduce my hearing. If I got caught stealing the plates it would be very bad and lead to a lot of questions that I can't answer. Ok, correction I can answer but that would be very very bad.

I pulled up a few cars away from the other little red car and checked to see if there were any signs of life before exiting my car. In a few houses lights had come on but the curtains were still closed. I got out pulling my cap down to hide my face and casually walked down the footpath to the car. One more glance around and saw nothing so I ducked down between the parked cars and took out my screwdriver. The first plate came off easy. I then went to the other side of the car and the same again. Tucking the plates Inside my coat. Then I put my hand in my pocket and held them inside and started to walk back to my car. A dog barked and didn't sound far away maybe just at the end of the street. I quickened my pace and got in my car and waited for a minute. A man appeared at the far end of the street walking a huge Rottweiler. The beast was yanking on the lead and the man kept tugging back. I slumped down in the driver's seat and watched as he crossed over and continued past. I turned around and left the road from the opposite end and drove to work.

Sitting in the break room I was the butt of the jokes. I tried to make witty remarks back but not all my punchlines landed. Most people seemed to believe my story. Nobody questioned me too badly anyway. Brian was sat reading the local paper when things took a little turn.

"Hey, lads has anyone heard about this."

He held up the paper showing us all the headlines. 

Police looking for good Samaritan.

"Someone has stopped a mugging in town over the weekend and disappeared. According to this he nearly strangled this cunt to death. This thieving scroat has been on a rampage for a while."

The room started to spin and I felt sick. Not with my actions, I felt good about what I had done. No the cause of my problems was the police were looking for me.

"Are you sure this isn't what happened to you, Harry?"

"Nah I would have run the other way. I'm no have a go hero."

Someone else chimed in then.

"Have you seen the state of him? The mugger has said he didn't see of manage to fight back."

Thank fuck for that shit seems to be working out in my favour. The rest of my day went without a hitch. That night I went back to reading about Denis Nealson. Who would have thought about cutting up your victims and boiling them up then pouring there remains down the drain. To me, that was quite impressive. Nook