Last Updated:
2024-09-01 01:16:00Phoebe was in a state of confusion, her heart feeling the impact of having to make this decision. She needed her to embrace, to cling to the warmth that Christian was willing to provide but she realized that would be selfish on her part and on his as well.
“I need time,”she murmured. “When I’m alone and unleashed, that’s when I do things which seems needful to my soul, the soul that needs to be set clear in a direction I yearn for or spend time in contemplation, in thought of things I so dearest desire, I hope you will comprehend that?”
Christian sighed, but there was nothing but sorrow in the eyes which were fixed on phoebe. “I do. And I hope that whatever happens between us, we’ll be able to remain friends because you are really important to me Phoebe, and I don’t want to have you out of my life altogether.”
Phoebe closed her throat feeling the bitterness of sweet moment she had with him. “You a
Previous Chapter
Related Chapters
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD Do You Still Love Him?
Seth looked at Christian and for once, his face could not be understood. “I am not here to mess up things I need to speak to my wife.”It was as if saying the word “wife” was a kind of sin, and seeing the word on paper hurt Phoebe’s eyes as well as her heart. It was so ironical that she had been struggling to let go of that title, and to avoid being typecast as a woman who was only known professionally as being married to Seth. But here he was, dragging her back into the very thing she was trying to escape from, into degradation, sin and death.“Perhaps they should be left alone,” Phoebe Augustine said to Christian Hardy. It was the last thing she wanted; she did not want this to turn into something else than what it had become.Christian tried to look away but his eyes met Seth’s, he thought for a minute then finally bobbed his head up and down. ‘I think that it’s better that two of you get some space,’ he stated unwelcomingly, but his tone betrayed him. He got up and hugged her and
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD What You Really Want
Christian put the spatula that he was holding in his hand down on the center table, and then calmly walked up to her looking very much sad, but understanding. “I know you didn't know Phoebe, but every time things are not well and I can see that they are not what they seem to be”She agreed by nodding and her eyes started to water again. “You have been so tolerant of me, so gracious; and I don’t want to cause you suffering, Christian.”Christian extended forth and touched her hand, holding it softly its temperature a comfortable one. “I do like you, Phoebe … a lot … but I think I need to know something very important first.Are you still in love with Seth?”Phoebe was standing before Christian and all she felt was a chill run down her spine. The question lingered between them yet again; full of the reality, which Sophie had been trying to avoid so much. She brought her hands to the table and linked them with his; she couldn’t even look at him any longer. Then she said in a low tone: “I
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD I Still Love Her
Seth sat in his office with his back resting on the comfortable black leather executive chair and his eyes glued on the big glass that framed. Skylines which are symbolic of the pride of human achievement felt claustrophobic today. The morning had been one long string of meetings and phone calls, and she had hardly been conscious of what had been going on. The meeting at the apartment alone with Phoebe occupied his mind constantly, as well as the fact of their separation.Deep in his mind, Seth recalled the last few moments of the family’s encounter with the bad people and his fists tightened. Just watching the ease with which the man accepted himself, felt at home in Phoebe’s apartment, had threatened to make him mad with jealousy and frustration. He had visited Phoebe there to enquire from her how she was feeling after all that they had been subjected to.unfortunately Christian showed up at her house which was making him think that she has really moved on with her life without him
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD I'm Confused
The truth was that there was something more than friendship between her and Seth and she had felt this way for quite some time. But she also knew that he was in love with Phoebe and never will stop being in love with her.Sasha hesitated, and the minute Seth stepped off the porch, she let the tears for which she had been fighting fall. She was quite sure that she had done the right thing, still the pain did not seem to be far from the truth.Sasha clea her tears, breathed deeply and regained the composure that she had been accustomed to. She had always been busy, and there was still much to do, which was why she could not afford to be stupid now and simply give in. But the pain in her chest brought her back to the fact that some wars were waged internally and out of the sight of others.And for Sasha, this was one battle of hers she was fully aware that she could never hope to come out on the winning side.Lucy was awakened by morning sunlight and she found Phoebe sitting on the edge
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD Grandma's Visit
It was as if every space in Phoebe’s apartment was filled with a sort of tension that was inherited from the day. Christian sat on the couch thinking in circles all the while looking at the cup of coffee Christy handed him. Rising from the breakfast table, Christian was still weighed down by the morning’s developments; the feeling was a twinge of hope and a dash of apprehension churning in his stomach. He tried to control himself, tried to remain calm and collected in front of Phoebe, as she needed a strong man in her life. However, that was a huge issue that had led to tension between the two since the man did not know where he stood in the lady’s life.His musings were interrupted by a loud knock on the door which snapped him right back to reality. He frowned not seeing anyone that he anticipated to meet. But the sensation in his stomach did not let him go and he felt apprehensive as he got near the door.He of course did not think that the woman standing behind the door when he op
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD The Man at The Bar
And if you can’t demonstrate to her that you are all those things, that you are different and you are the one she should be with, she will move to the next man. Well, you’re on your own then, buddy or maybe I’m speaking to you, you never know. ”Suffocating with the pressure of her words was what Christian experienced Cameroonian could literally feel the weight from her words. He could not think of anyone who had an easier time with the girl of his dreams; he could not imagine that he would have to compete to have her.‘I’m not going to pressure her,’ he murmured, nearly choking on the words. “I am too fond of her to do that.”Grandma Patterson’s eyes drooped, but just a little and for a brief second only with disapproval. “That does not go well with caring, Christian. Not if Seth is still in the picture. You have to be assertive, have to prove to her who you are and that you are ready to go to the end of the world for her.”Christian squeezed two tight fists before him, the turbulent
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD Meeting Alex
Phoebe chuckled softly. “That obvious, huh?”He smiled. ‘Only to someone who has been in such a position before’.She looked at the notebook that lies on the table. “Are you a writer?”“Sort of,” he replied, pointing to the cover. “I like to take papers and write down the things that I am thinking about. It aids my thinking processes because it is only when I see them written down in black and white do I actually stop and analyze my real thoughts.”Phoebe looked at him, and after absorbing all that he had said she nodded. ‘I say to you that one time I was a writer, at least I tried it, but now I do not write anymore’.“Perhaps you should,” he said, a gentle look in his eyes. “It may help you understand what is going on in that head of yours.” He said pointing to his forehead.Phoebe threw her head back and took a long swig of beer, frowning as she ran her finger round the circumference of the glass. “It’s like I have no clue what I want, but at the same time I can’t even imagine want
SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD You Have to Make a Choice
He could not get the previous night out of his head and even if he tried, something would trigger it again. It was on that note of dialogue that they had chatted and laughed for hours, and even establish certain form of intimacy, but inside her, he could feel her reluctance. She had feelings for Seth, as much as she fought them and that was the biggest blow to his pride.He remained seated for some time engrossed in his thoughts when his phone rang on the desk. He looked at the screen of the phone and realized that the message was written by his good friend, Alex. “Lunch today?”Christian stared at the message for a moment before typing a quick response: "Of Course bro, I will see you at our usual hangout place.”When Christian got to the café it was teeming with clients who were getting to-have their lunch. He saw Alex at the seat that they both frequent near the window and walked up to him. Alex was already halfway through his coffee, he sat there watching the screen of his smartpho
Latest Chapter
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
"What Regret"
“Regret,” she said with a sneer. Regret is just a euphemism for guilt. It doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t wipe the slate clean, and it definitely does not heal the mess that you made.‘Christian,’ she said softly, ‘don’t come any closer.’ He stopped, as she decided to step back from him.Phoebe flared up again and asked him: “You said you came for the truth?” “Fine. Here’s the truth, Christian. I loved you. With everything I had. And you destroyed me. You were able to make me question myself in ways that I never knew existed. And now you stand here, asking me for what? Closure? Redemption? Forgiveness?”“No,” he said firmly. All I am demanding is an opportunity to prove that I can improve.” That I am better.”She scoffed. “And you believe that one conversation is going to make a difference?” You think I can just what? Stare at you and forget the years I struggled to climb up the ladder and get a life again?“No,” he repeated again, and there was no quiver in his voice. “But I can’t
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Need You
Christian did not answer this for a while. He looked down, his hands were tightly bunched into fists at his sides. “I know it caused pain,” he said, his voice rising in a hoarse whisper. “I know I can’t undo that. But I can’t just let things be this way. Not anymore. If that means living with your hatred then let it be so.Phoebe only chuckled bitterly and began to pace in front of the fire. ‘Christian, you keep saying all the right things.’ Saying sorry, admitting my mistake, promising to take my anger on myself. But you don’t seem to understand. It’s not about you. Not anymore.”He stared at her with a frown on his face. “Then what is it about?”“It’s about me,” she said angrily, turning to him. ‘That’s about the years I’ve spent struggling to climb out of the pit you dug for me to fall into.’ It is about finding out how to be independent, how to live without the feeling that my chest is going to collapse. It’s about healing, or at least, about trying to put myself back together aft
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Believe inYou
Phoebe shook her head, her arms wrapped around herself. “You don’t get it, Christian. Other people also had the same feeling as you; they were scared. I was terrified too. Of losing you, of not being good enough. But I stayed. I fought. And you didn’t.”“I know,” he said and his eyes welled up with tears. “And I hate myself for that. I wish I could have been stronger and did not leave when I did. But I’m here now, Phoebe. And I’m not running this time.”She glared at him and her eyes were red with rage, hurt and something else which she could not describe. “You say that now,” she whispered. But what happens when things get hard again? This begs the question, what happens when the cracks start to show?“They won’t,” he said firmly. “Because I’ve come to realize that running in particular does not solve anything. It just leaves a trail of broken pieces behind.”Phoebe only shook her head and a tear rolled down her face. She gently removed it as if she was embarrassed to show her weaknes
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
“I’m confused”
It’s convenient. You were waiting until you felt I was ready and powerful enough to take the news. Until you thought I didn’t need you anymore.”“That is not true,” Christian said quickly, getting up, his voice a high pitched note. “I have been taking this guilt with me every day since I left.” I did not return because of convenience. I returned because I could not continue living such a life knowing that I destroyed something that was wonderful.Phoebe whirled on her toes, glaring. “And what about me? Have you ever thought what it feels like to wake up every day with the marks you have made on others? To have to break yourself down and begin to build yourself up again from scratch just to have the one who was responsible for tearing you down appear with an apology?”“I do now,” he said quietly. “Because I do, I see it in your eyes. I hear it in your voice. And I hate myself for being the reason it’s there.”She was breathing raggedly, her hands were balled up at her sides. “You don’t
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Either you believe or not
Christian sighed deeply and rested his hands on the table. “I am a man who wants to know how to accept what I have done. To challenge it, rather than avoiding it. To be able to admit that I can change the future but I can’t change the present and I can’t change the past.”Phoebe scoffed. ‘You really believe that taking responsibility is sufficient?’ You really believe that saying you were wrong in any of this makes it alright?”“No,” Christian said quickly. “It doesn’t make it okay. Nothing can make it okay. But it’s a start, isn’t it? A step toward being better. Towards becoming a person who does not destroy things.”Phoebe looked at her sister with her face impassive and then shook her head. “You want to be better? Good for you. But you don’t get to use me as your redemption arc. I am not some check-point on your way to self-improvement.”“I’m not asking you to be,” Christian said, his voice quiet, but commanding. I don’t need your forgiveness or your approval for anything I am doin
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Lingering pain
“Phoebe,” he started cautiously, “I’m not here to put more load on you regarding this.” I know you didn’t want any of this and I’m not going to say that I’m so great for coming here now. But I’ve been attempting to take responsibility for my actions. And part of that means realizing how much I caused you pain.”Phoebe’s lips formed, her arms drawn tightly around her in the manner of a shield. “It does not heal the wound, Christian.” Oh do you think that knowing you regret it will give me back the time I lost? The trust I lost? The parts of me that had to be reconstructed?”“No,” replied Christian, who now looked ashamed. “I don’t. And I’m not asking you to forget what I did or even forgive me. I just had to tell you that… I can see it now. I can now understand how self-centered I was and how unable to notice your suffering.She tilted her head to the side, her mouth tightening as she looked out the window and saw the rain running down the glass. “Blind, huh?” she said with much bitter
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
All about Phoebe
Phoebe went back to the fire, her hands folding over her chest. For what seemed like a long time she did not respond. The fire crackled in the background, and its heat was the only thing that made the atmosphere between them warm.“What do you want from me, Christian?” she asked after a long time her voice was so low that it was barely audible.“Nothing,” he said quickly. “I don’t want anything from you. I just… I had to share it with you because it is the truth. To say sorry and let you understand that I noticed your suffering. That I see you.”Phoebe only managed to stifle a sarcastic laugh. “You see me now? That’s rich. Where was this clarity two years ago?”Christian moved a little closer and spoke slowly and calmly as if he was pleading with her. I was blind back then Phoebe.” As if the rest of the world does not exist, or, at least, I don’t exist to the rest of the world. But now… now I see everything I should have seen before. I understand how powerful you are, how much you inv
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Get rewarded
“Sorry isn’t enough,” said Phoebe, tears rolling down her cheeks. “They think they can just come out and apologize and that’s the end of it.”“I’m not expecting that,” Christian said quickly. I know that I can never reverse the wrong I have done. But I had to tell you. I had to stop bringing this with me without doing something about it.”Phoebe exhaled hard and then rested her weight against the windowsill. “Well, did you even know what you left behind?” “How much I had to tidy up after you?”“I’ve thought about it,” Christian said, softly. “But I know that thinking about it isn’t the same as living it. I still can’t fathom how difficult it must have been for you.”Phoebe looked at her and shook her head, fuming again. “And you didn’t just hurt me, Christian.” You made me doubt, everything, including us, including myself. I used so much time thinking why am I not enough. Why I couldn’t repair whatever was ailing you.”Christian cringed as if the words that came out of her mouth had h
- SETH RIVERA AND THE ULTIMATE BLACK CARD
Another Game
One part of him wanted to kick Christian out, shut the door and never see him again. But there was another part, a lesser, more contemplative part of him that was interesting. What if Christian really had transformed? What if this wasn’t just another one of his games?“Alright,” Phoebe said in the end, the word coming out sounding more like a bitter grumble. “You want to talk? Talk. ‘I’m not making any guarantees here,’ I tell him.Christian nodded and his shoulders dropped down as well. He looked around the room, and then looked at the couch. “Do you mind if we sit?”Phoebe frowned, then reluctantly gestured at the couch with a nod. He stayed on his feet, leaning with his arms folded against the wall, a defensive air about him.Christian leaned back on the couch, placing his elbows on his knees and his hands on top of each other. He looked at the floor for a moment with a blank face, then he said something.“I know I hurt you. And not just once—repeatedly. You wanted to help me and I
