Chapter Four (Reassurance)

Raymond flung his car keys on the table. He glanced at the entire living room, and his gaze settled on the sofa where he left Dera a couple of hours ago. But she's not there anymore.

"Babe? I'm home!"

Hands gliding on the hand drill, he strode upstairs.

"Oh, you're back," Dera said almost immediately as he barged into the bedroom. Her pretty set of canines and incisors came into view when her lips pouted with a smile. That kind of smile that Raymond would kill any potbellied asshole to put on her face.

"You came right on time."

She zipped a bag. She shoved it to the side of the bed. She drew another bag closer to her "These are your clothes, I'm sure you will need them. Here! Guns, recorders, IDs, and your shoes are packed in here." She zipped that bag. She placed it on the floor.

Raymond's lips pouted with a sigh. He let go of the door and walked towards the bed

"Dera. Why are you doing this?" His tone sounded gloomy even if he intended it to sound despotic and strict.

"Doing what?"

Dera stared at him and she broke the eye contact again. She bit her lips and snuggled to the edge of the bed where Raymond stood.

"I'm not doing this because I support the dirty games you play. I'm doing this because it is what I owe you. I love you, Raymond." The glamour in her eyes faded like the lights at the end of an invaded tunnel. "But, I don't think you love me enough. Enough to -"

Raymond shut her lips with his mouth. That sudden kiss made Dera tilt her head to meet his deep brown eyes staring at her. He paddled his thumb over her lips. Dera's heart missed a beat when he kissed her again.

"I love you Dera. More than you can ever imagine. You and that baby in there are my world right now."

Dera scoffed. She paced to the closet. "Oh. I think we need to find a new meaning for that word."

A gasp flew off Raymond's lips.

"What do you mean?" Raymond conked out lazily into the bed.

"I mean you're saying that because your lips are itching to find the right words to describe how disappointed you are that I got pregnant."

Dera thought she could restrain the impact her words would have on Raymond. But words are like bullets - impossible to hold back after the trigger is pulled.

Raymond's heart throbbed in disappointment. His jaw tightened, wrinkles appearing at the corner of his face. He arose from the bed, giving Dera a blank stare.

He bit his lips, trying to find the right word, even if Dera was being indecisive with hers. A wrong word may unveil the rage he is trying to conceal.

"Why would you even say that?" he stepped towards Dera. He wrapped his hand around her neck, and buried his face in her shoulder, ruffling her hair with his hand. "Dera, it makes me sad that you doubt how much I love you," he muttered.

Dera clicked her tongue, and she heaved a sigh, attempting to walk away, but Raymond's hands wouldn't let go.

"Then prove it to me," she said.

Raymond's hands extricated from her neck. She turned to stare at his widened eyeballs.

"For how -" Raymond tried to speak but was cut short.

"For the last time Ray!" Dera interrupted.

Raymond tightened his jaw, his heart constricting in rage.

"What do you want Dera?" he asked, with a stoic look on his face.

Dera's eyes lit up, like a kid that's about to be taken to MacDonald on their birthday.

"You're wealthy Ray. You have enough money to relocate to another country and start a new life and walk away from all the troubles -"

Dera moved closer to Raymond, her hands hovered on his shoulder. "You deserve a better life babe. We deserve a better life." Her breath hit Raymond's face as she spoke.

"I know we deserve a better life, but -"

"Not buts Ray!" Dera interrupted. "I cannot bring a child into this mess, this chaotic and restless environment. I'm happy that I'd soon be a mother, but the thought that we will be raising a child around here hurts me more than the pains of a laboring mother."

Raymond kept mute, eyes staring into nothing. Obviously, it was time to make the hardest decision of his life. Being a part of Trysis was like owning a gold medal. It feels like he's settling a score - in the most bloody way. And at least the whole violence had made him sail through the trauma of losing his parents. Leaving that path to a new phase is like doing the hard yards.

"You mean we should evacuate California?"

Dera shook her head in affirmation.

"But I've lived here for a while. It is going to be tough settling into another country." Raymond said with a frown clutching to the side of his face.

"Raymond!" Dera called. She sniffed and continued "You never thought you'd live in Cally for this long. If your parents were still alive, you'd -"

"Dera don't bring my parents into this. Let the dead rest in peace." Raymond muttered. "Al found me after that devastating moment and that's why we're having this conversation right now. I can't just leave like that. Besides -" Raymond paused. he took two steps back before completing the sentence "I'm on another mission, and I'm off to Kenya tomorrow." he said.

Dera sulked in a breath. She dug her fingers into her palms. "Ray" She muttered, retaining eye contact. She brushed Raymond's shoulder with hers as she strode towards the door, she paused immediately as she grasped the knob.

"If you love me and your unborn child as much as you claim, that should be your last mission" She slammed the door, leaving Raymond to wallow in solitude.