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How My Life Was Ruined 120: Suffering Because Of Me
I reached the train station a bit late than our scheduled time.On the bench in the waiting area was the person I had come to meet.She was wearing a half-sleeved blouse on top with the shoulders exposed and a simple white skirt that reached to her knees.I walked up to where she was.Upon hearing the sound of my boots, she turned her head towards me slowly.“I thought you wouldn’t come.” She said with a heave of relief.As I sat down on the bench next to her, I thought that the charm the usual Nakamura had was not present on her face tonight. As if something had diminished her radiance. I knew that I was to blame for that one way or the other.The time was 11: 30 at the night. She had asked to meet at 11 but I ended up being late because I wasn’t yet sure whether I should go or not. It was Hayami’s persistence that I came here even though I was half an hour late as a result.“Attention all passengers. The last train for today will be arriving in fifteen minutes. I repeat…”The static
How My Life Was Ruined 121: It's Too Late
When I reached home at around 1 am, there were two people at the dining table beside the living room.One was Hayami. And the other one was sitting with her back to me. Her long brown hair reflected the light in the room.“Aina?”I walked around and stood behind Hayami so that I could be face-to-face with Aina.She had dark circles under her eyes.“I will leave you two alone.” Hayami stood up and then climbed the stairs to go to my room.I sat on the seat Hayami had been sitting on and faced Aina.Silence settled in the room. I was confused and surprised why she was here. How did she know where I lived in the first place? All the students had been taken back to Tokyo after the school camp ended. So that means she came all the way here to Kyoto to meet me? And all alone? Why would she do that?Just about an hour ago, I had had a small conversation with Nakamura at the train station. Thinking that Aina had likely come here for the same purpose, I spoke, breaking the silence.“You are he
How My Life Was Ruined 122: Denial
“It’s too late.”Bam!Aina slammed the table hard with both of her hands and stood up simultaneously.“It’s not late. It is never late. You still have so much of your life ahead. You will always have a chance to make things right.”Even if I lived, I know there is no way I can make things right. In fact, I would only make things worse. Yeah, not even bad, but worse. That’s my ability. I can make things worse without getting them bad. Though no point in thinking about that.Unaware of my internal feelings, Aina spoke at the top of her lungs.“Don’t give up. We can work things out. So, it’s still not late. As long as you are alive.”I gave a smile to her in response, without actually intending to.“Yeah. That’s right. As long as I am alive.”“Yes, that’s right!”Misunderstanding my statement as agreement with her words, she broke into a smile only to break into a cold sweat with my next words.“But what do you mean by being alive?”“Eh?” She gave a quizzical look to my question.“What a
How My Life Was Ruined 123: The One Grave Mistake
After calming down a bit, I looked down to the dining area from the stairs. The old hag was sitting there waiting for someone. And I knew that someone was me.“Hayami, you go wait for a little longer.”“Hmm. Okay~” Although, she seemed reluctant after I gave her a kiss, she went back to the room. After hearing the click of the door locking, I made my way downstairs and sat in an empty chair facing the old hag.“Why are you here?” I asked.“We heard from Aina's parents that she had run away from home and would like our help to search for her. That’s why I am here.”So I was right that she had run away from home without telling anyone.“But, why are you here? How did you know Aina would be here?” Did she know beforehand that the only place Aina will head to after running from her home under the current circumstances will be my house? I could think of the old hag arriving to that conclusion. She was quick-witted after all.“No. We just followed her path.” She continued. “We checked the C
How My Life Was Ruined 124: I Have Never Hated you
For the next five minutes after my mom dashed to the bathroom, no one spoke. I feel like these long and short stretches of silence in the middle of conversations were happening a lot to me. Was it a meaningful silence or a meaningless one? Did the silence speak louder than the words or was it just and merely silence? I don’t know.“She sure is taking long. What must she be doing?” The old hag broke the silence with a meaningful question.“Yeah, I wonder what.”Although I knew what she wanted to hear from me, I played the fool. I knew what she was doing in the bathroom. She was without a doubt crying her eyes out hurt by the scathing words of her own son.The old hag gave me a smile as if she had seen that coming.“Putting aside your words that you being born itself was the root of it all, don’t you feel angry?”“Angry? Why?”“If you hadn’t learned what your mom had been doing, things wouldn’t have gone that out of hand. Let’s say if your mom hadn’t been cheating on your dad, if Nakamu
How My Life Was Ruined 125: The Escape
I went back and sat down on my earlier seat.My mom came out of the bathroom after a few minutes.Her face was wet. She probably washed her face so that she could hide the fact that she was crying. But her red eyes gave it away. The pain was still there in her face.I handed her the towel lying on the sofa. She dried her face with that and shortly after the old hag came in.I took out my phone and started scrolling through the feed on social media. Though I was still paying keen attention to the old hag.Hmm.Just then I noticed the two of them make eye contact. It was nothing unusual but it definitely caught my attention.The time was 3 in the morning. I ended up staying awake all night today.“Furukawa-san, why don’t you stay till morning? You probably are hungry with all the speaking and work. I will whip up something quickly and you can take a short nap to give some rest to your body till the morning.”“Hmm.” The old hag seemed to be thinking about her proposal and eventually, she
How My Life Was Ruined 126: The End Of The Story
“Finally.”I muttered as I stood on the edge of the rooftop holding hands with Hayami.The cold wind ruffled our hairs.I was battered. Bruise covered my body here and there and there was also a gun wound on my lower leg. Hayami had ripped her skirt to tie it around my leg to prevent blood loss. Although I found it hilarious that she was trying to prevent the blood loss of someone who was going to die soon, I didn’t speak a word and let her do her work.“We can finally die.”Although I had wanted to go in a grand way, this was good in its own way. It gave me the adrenaline rush that made my spirit pump even more.Suicide?No.Don’t term what we are about to do with something as petty and cowardly as suicide.It was the only good thing that I was going to do ever in my life. Everyone should be overjoyed that I was about to remove a corrupt and wretched existence from this world.My life, not only was it meaningless, it was sought with suffering, pain, chaos, betrayal, deceit, and every
How My Life Was Ruined 127: After The End - I
The news had made headlines across the country.No matter which channel Nakamura switched to, everywhere, it was the same news, the same grisly spectacle and the same pain of having lost someone important assaulted her.She shouldn’t have been surprised. He had tried to end his life once. It shouldn’t have been surprising that he would try to do the same. What was surprising was how short the interval between his attempted suicide and death was. She had expected the authorities to take some action to prevent that from happening and they did take action and kept him under surveillance but he had somehow managed to escape and end his life.She turned off the TV and sat on the floor facing the veranda.A cold wind blew and sent her hair flying. She looked to her right. There was no one.If he had been alive, he would probably be outside on the veranda.If he had been alive. But the fact was that he wasn’t.Nakamura knew that Kageyama had wanted to end his life. She always had thought tha
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