How many men can brag about dying fucking a woman less than half his age in a parking lot? I could, if I weren’t dead, of course. At sixty years old, my dick could still get harder than a stripper pole. Alas, though, my magnificent manliness is what ended up doing me in, because despite my cock being ready and willing, my heart just couldn’t keep up. It’s funny in a cosmically fucked up kind of way… I’d spent my entire life not knowing I had a heart, only for it to make itself known by cockblocking me through cardiac arrest. “Daddy?! Daddy?!” A panicked voice with daddy issues was the last thing I heard before a deafening crack. Then silence. Blackness. Nothingness. Fuck! No women after death? I mean, come on! I can take the fires of hell as long as there are feisty succubus and the likes servicing me from time to time. With an electric buzz, a blue screen materialized in front of me. Letters scrawl across the display: “Game over!” I feel someone watching me, causing my metap

On Kerenza, once the sun no longer shines on the sky, the temperature drops in the blink of an eye. Yes, I used to pass my time writing lame rhymes when I had nothing better to do. Sometimes it helped with a certain kind of ladies. Sometimes it did not. While I trudged on the slope to the top of the hill, I kept the cold at bay. Now, as the widow’s house comes into view and the ground is flat under my feet, the chilly breeze makes me gather tightly around me the bear coat I’m wearing over my shoulders. The sword is safely sheathed in its scabbard and rests hanging from a girdle I put around my waist. By the time I knock at the widow’s door, the darkness has settled, and the smell of rain permeates the air. I’m tired and bored. I have to end this errand quick, find a tavern, and a wench with big tits cascading over the cleavage as I’ve seen in the movies. Yeah, that would make my day. No time to waste with an old widow.As soon as the door creaks open, I yank the sword free from t

Wrenn has a small sleeping space in a tiny alcove in the back of the smithy. The place is barely big enough for him to lie down on his side and curl up a bit, or otherwise, his head hits the wall. To the right of his sleeping mat, shelves and storage bins of various sizes and shapes are piled high with tools and materials. Wrenn has to duck his head beneath other instruments hanging from the ceiling to get to his sleeping spot. Beneath the last shelf near his mat, there’s a small nook in the wall where once a mouse resided. That mouse has since long gone, eaten by a neighbor’s cat. Now, the nook is a storage space for the few things Wrenn has, including the letter I’m searching for. After plunging my hand into the hiding place up to near my elbow, I dig out the letter and set it on the sleeping mat. Even though the sigil is torn, I recognize the family crest in the wax seal as that of the Averys. This noble family is of the highest rank in the country of Zhenaria, and they have

“Wait!” I yell, one last attempt to make them stop. My feet leave the marble on the balcony’s floor as I lean forward, my head hanging over the edge. The wind is whipping through my hair as I scream for help. The ground is fast approaching. Nothing can save me now.Free falling is a common experience in stories and nightmares, but in real life, it's deadly. You can laugh as much as you want, but these seconds before reaching the ground seem to last forever. If this is going to be my second time dying, I must say I prefer the first. Everything was better, starting with the woman calling me—[Daddy?! Daddy?!] Yes, the same voice rings in my head, but instead of the hot woman I was fucking when I died, it’s just my useless, annoying system. What have I done to deserve this to be the last thing I talk to?[Quit whining! Choose the +1 life option from the pending rewards]I want the +1 life! Now![Reward granted]The ground is still fast approaching my face. How will the extra life appl

[Don’t kill me, daddy. Please. I promise I have a good side task now]Oh, do you have good side tasks too? I can’t imagine. [Daddy, don’t be mean]Hmm…. your voice sounds a bit… aroused? Are you getting off on this? [Uhmm… No! So… Uhmm… Side task acquired: Make a woman cum without using your dick in the next 15 minutes. The countdown is starting now]A small lettering countdown starts at 15:00 minutes, counting down in the top left corner of my left eye. I lose focus on things around me, my eyes darting toward the timer as if I have a medical condition or something.System, this is too distracting. Can you remove the countdown and let me focus on my task? Just remind me in case I have less than a minute left. Though I should be done a lot faster than that. [Yes, daddy]Surprisingly, the countdown vanishes, and the system’s voice doesn’t bother me anymore. I return my attention to the widow, who stares at me from the corner of her left eye as her right cheek is still pressed agains