you're so old jokes

Follow the life of Sakamo Ryu on Earth, where he is Sakamo Ryu, a fifteen-year-old boy with ascendency of English-Japanese.  His other life is as Alex Brim, a Hero for Hire on the Magical World Azurath to where he can travel by using a magical pendant.  His help is needed from time to time, because of the Magical Voids that appear in the sky from where Monsters fall, making the lives of the different species that lives there, a very hard one.  … Alex shouted to the Orc, surprising everyone, “Eat him already! He is in my way, I want your head and the pretty Magical Orb you have inside you! You are not dead already because that dumbass is still there, but as soon as you kill him, you are all mine!” The Orc let his hostage go that fell on the ground with a muffled bump. The Orc raised his mace to the sky and screamed, giving the signal for the Goblins to attack. At the same time, Alex whispered, “Give me a little of your strength, Shinatobe.” A small dot of light near his right ear answered in a low voice, “As you say, Master.” ...

"I will remember the faces of all of you, and wait for my revenge!" Chen Long said before his death... His soul sped up and migrated into the body of a newly deceased baby which. Until the baby and its soul can live again His ambition was ignited to become an invincible Sword God along with past memories of the Sword God Book by engraving his name in the unforgettable legend....

-[You have Obtained the Vampire Progenitor System] -[Begin your journey as the son of the moon and the embodiment of darkness] . . The world has changed. Super humans known as Magis walk the earth, wielding an esoteric force known as beta. Aiden is always ridiculed by his peers due to his inability to wield beta force. However, through a twist of incidents, he awakens something even better than beta force; The Vampire Progenitor System! . . I retain Copyright to the book cover

Sebastian Cole became homeless after his wealthy-mafia family was accused of fraud. After ten years, he finds his fiancée married to another man. Sebastian is about to die when he suddenly hears a voice... [Ding!] [System installation begins] [10%] [30%] [80%] [100%] [Congratulations, Sebastian Cole, you have unlocked the God's Legacy system!]

DO YOU WANT POWER? ((YES)) ((NO)) You only have 20 seconds to answer. If you don't answer, your selection automatically will be ((yes)).

"Do you think I would wait around for a jailbird like you when a man like Matteo wants me? Are you nuts?” Jason Monroe couldn't believe his ears when he heard those hateful words from his girlfriend, who was the cause of his imprisonment, as she stood in her wedding gown about to be married to the man who sent him to prison. A talented man with great ambitions, Jason Monroe had come a long way from being the punky orphan in the foster system to the C.E.O. of his own tech company, which he founded right after he finished college. Just when he thought he had everything under control, his girlfriend was accosted by the young master of the most influential family in Dengal. Enraged by the obscenity, Jason fought the man in honor of his girlfriend. Nobody touches the rich and powerful without paying a dear price. Jason learned this bitter lesson when he was imprisoned for three good years. After enduring a jail term in the notorious Ratsburgh prison, known for its cruelty. Jason, who met a mysterious man in prison, was released with the expectation of reuniting with the love of his life. The woman who was about to marry Jason’s nemesis Shocked by the discovery of his girlfriend’s betrayal, equipped with his newly bestowed authority. Jason set out on his journey of revenge, the tussle of power, and realization of how difficult it was to be “the man who wears the ring” Will Jason have all it takes to be the Grand Patriarch?

"Come on, waiter," Tom taunted, his voice dripping with contempt. "You should lick it up while it's still cool," he added with a sly chuckle as his friends eagerly removed their phones to capture August’s humiliation for their amusement. August was devastated, the money he had been saving for the past eight months barely amounted to $180. How would he muster $800 to spare himself from this humiliating ordeal? Stooping that low to lick the liquor on the floor was an option he rather succumbed to death sooner than consider.  "Please, give me until tomorrow. I'll find a way to borrow the money and pay you back," August pleaded, desperation creeping into his voice. But Tom was not having it with him. “No waiter, everything starts and end today. If you are going to pay me the money then is going to be today and right now, or I will have to force you to lick up the liquor”. August's devastation intensified as he realized the gravity of the situation, this was not optional like Tom presented it the first time. His intentions were clear; he did not at all cared about the money all he wanted was to have August lick the floor for their amusement.

Reggie Fabray knew that his wife didn't take him seriously, but watching her bring her lover to their house to hang out was just too much, don't you think? That's when a car accident becomes the turning point for Reggie. The tide is turning in his favor, those who have always believed in Reggie will be rewarded, while those who have slighted him... will get what they deserve!

Maxwell Reed had his life going smoothly for him until he came to discover that his loving girlfriend, Vicky Thorman had been cheating on him with the Governor's son, John Reider. Powerless and poor, the least Maxwell could do was to pack up and lay low so he could endure his disgrace and slowly heal from his heartbreak, but what happens when he comes to find out that he is the long-lost son of a billionaire's descendants? And when his grandmother breaks the silence on how he had been adopted, will this help him reconnect the dots on what happened to his real parents?

You know exactly what I mean," she blurts, her voice filled with frustration. "I know you wanted a life of wealth, far from the wretched one you live and I wanted to offer you that if you had just taken my offer and back out" She spat. He feels a surge of anger rising within him, fueled by her accusations. "Shut up!" He snapped, his voice laced with bitterness. Yet he hurriedly forced a thin lipped smile. "You know Exactly what I'm saying is right.," she retorts, her orbs blazing with a mix of anger and disgust. "I will never be able to love you, Ares! You are undeserving of me! I deserve way much better than your crap!" she seethes with venom, her words laced with anger and disdain. He can't help but chuckle, unable to contain his amusement. "And you think I'd settle for a brat like you? You will never be enough for me," he retorted, his voice dripping with sarcasm. ••• Ares, wrongly imprisoned for 3 years, seeks justice after being framed by a rich kid. A mysterious old man in jail teaches him martial arts and medicine. On release, Ares finds his mother blind and his father dead due to the rich kid's revenge. Ares vows to seek retribution.